Men-how well do you communicate?

[cocoabutter27]

I can't say: "Do you think this will work, I'm not sure if we can make this happen." I have to say, "Look, we may have some issues here and there with this plan but we'll try our best to make it happen."

I also realized that women want to talk about the relationship and lay into you about what you've not done or how you can improve ... and the worse thing that a man can do at that time is to do it right back to her.

I just gently suggest way we can make things better.



I like the way you approached the first sentence...it does sound hopeful and confident and women definitely appreciate that in their man. 2nd sentence-it is one of the worst things. Don't get mad at me because I'm rightfully upset with you. This does not help anything AT ALL. Gentle suggestions are always best...if we think our man is unhappy and he comes to us nicely....I will bend over backwards to fix it.

 

[OfTheCross]

If you want something changed, improved on, or just done then does it hurt you to say it nicely. "Stop leaving your shyt on the floor" is different than saying "Babe, put your stuff in the hamper...all the time, every time, thanks"

Pick your shyt up. I'm not babysitting adults or their feelings.

 

[cocoabutter27]

Pick your shyt up. I'm not babysitting adults or their feelings.

I will pick it up...if you ask me nicely

 

[EA]

If you leave it unsaid, do you hold it against her? If the change never happens won't that just lead to loss of interest in a relationship with her? Would it be different if it was a serious relationship vs. casual dating?

I've tried the whole "talk about the problem as soon as it comes up" approach and it either results in (very) temporary change or denial. Both are equally annoying. The only thing that works in my favour is that I don't bring things up until I can logically explain it so it doesn't look like I'm just being irrational.

It's worse in casual dating for me because I have no problem not talking to girl for days/weeks. I'm too busy with work to be the lovey-dovey bugaboo type so if I feel disrespected, I just go ghost for a while. She's probably got other dudes in rotation anyway

 

[KingFreeman]

Its difficult to do, but practicing compartmentalizing priorities in life and not attaching too much significance to trivial things can make a changed man. Things like worrying about what the next man is doing with his life instead of building your own brand/look, chasing superficial ideas, putting punanny above everything else 24/7, etc.

 

[awkwardblackgirl]

Women want communication but then focus on how a breh says than what is being communicated.

How you say something makes a big difference, though.

 

[Action Mike]

How you say something makes a big difference, though.

I know, just an observation