SeveroDrgnfli
Ain't nobody tryin to get indicted.
I started thinking about mine. 
I can't pick one as the funniest. I'd love to hear yours.
I can't pick one as the funniest. I'd love to hear yours.
Share your funniest sexual experience.
- Thread starter SeveroDrgnfli
- Start date
SheWantTheD
Veteran
Chick told me "ima be right back" and brought back a ruler after she saw what I was workin' wit 
AyBrehHam Linkin
First Black Brehsident
Prolly back in 10th grade when i was hitting this girl and i could hear her mother, who was like 78, breathing with the iron lung or respirator or w/e the fukk in the other room. At the time i was like 
but looking back 
but looking back Having the condom break and she said "what happened?"I said "My dikk ate the condom."
She looked at me for a second, shook her head, and we started bussing up.
Turlast
Superstar
Was about to get it in with one of the sexiest girls I've ever known. Excitement was on another level--dikk was super hard. She got naked, and that strong sour odor made my shyt go down. I didn't know whether I was 
at the fact that she smelled like that, or the fact that my shyt lost all of his motivation 
Terrible, but funny looking back.
at the fact that she smelled like that, or the fact that my shyt lost all of his motivation Terrible, but funny looking back.
Had a few drinks at the bar, but I was in the mood for something else. Went out for a cigarette, caught my bae for the night with one look.
She asked if I had a big dyck right away, I ignored everything, until we made our way to the park, It was a long walk, cold azz hell in the middle of February. She pulled out some crack, and we picked up some weed on way there. Once it kicked in, she was begging for some head. Started giving her head, and all the liquor came up, but that really got her going once I threw up all over he privates. Took two more hits, then we went in. We must have his about ten positions on the crass by the highway. Drugs were good.
The funny thing was when it was all said and done, she asked if I'd be around next weekend maybe we can get a hotel. That's the funny part, she thought were were friends all of a sudden. Also by she I mean this Dominican version of a black retired man I was lusting after but he wouldn't give it up as he said he was straight. This nygga dyck was huge, and after that first hit, he bent me over i took all ten inches like a pro. The other funny thing is that things got awkward when he kept on telling me to open my p*ssy up and using spit as lube, but didn't eat my a$$.
Hope dude got help, it's rough out there. Also, felt like killing him, because after I'd sleep with homeless men i'd become homicidal, so eventually i learned my lesson and stopped doing it.
i got funny stories for days about Harlem and Washington heights at 3 am. sometimes I miss those days.
She asked if I had a big dyck right away, I ignored everything, until we made our way to the park, It was a long walk, cold azz hell in the middle of February. She pulled out some crack, and we picked up some weed on way there. Once it kicked in, she was begging for some head. Started giving her head, and all the liquor came up, but that really got her going once I threw up all over he privates. Took two more hits, then we went in. We must have his about ten positions on the crass by the highway. Drugs were good.
The funny thing was when it was all said and done, she asked if I'd be around next weekend maybe we can get a hotel. That's the funny part, she thought were were friends all of a sudden. Also by she I mean this Dominican version of a black retired man I was lusting after but he wouldn't give it up as he said he was straight. This nygga dyck was huge, and after that first hit, he bent me over i took all ten inches like a pro. The other funny thing is that things got awkward when he kept on telling me to open my p*ssy up and using spit as lube, but didn't eat my a$$.
Hope dude got help, it's rough out there. Also, felt like killing him, because after I'd sleep with homeless men i'd become homicidal, so eventually i learned my lesson and stopped doing it. i got funny stories for days about Harlem and Washington heights at 3 am. sometimes I miss those days.
AlainLocke
Banned
Had a few drinks at the bar, but I was in the mood for something else. Went out for a cigarette, caught my bae for the night with one look.
She asked if I had a big dyck right away, I ignored everything, until we made our way to the park, It was a long walk, cold azz hell in the middle of February. She pulled out some crack, and we picked up some weed on way there. Once it kicked in, she was begging for some head. Started giving her head, and all the liquor came up, but that really got her going once I threw up all over he privates. Took two more hits, then we went in. We must have his about ten positions on the crass by the highway. Drugs were good.
The funny thing was when it was all said and done, she asked if I'd be around next weekend maybe we can get a hotel. That's the funny part, she thought were were friends all of a sudden. Also by she I mean this Dominican version of a black retired man I was lusting after but he wouldn't give it up as he said he was straight. This nygga dyck was huge, and after that first hit, he bent me over i took all ten inches like a pro. The other funny thing is that things got awkward when he kept on telling me to open my p*ssy up and using spit as lube, but didn't eat my a$$.
i got funny stories for days about Harlem and Washington heights at 3 am. sometimes I miss those days.
Had a few drinks at the bar, but I was in the mood for something else. Went out for a cigarette, caught my bae for the night with one look.
She asked if I had a big dyck right away, I ignored everything, until we made our way to the park, It was a long walk, cold azz hell in the middle of February. She pulled out some crack, and we picked up some weed on way there. Once it kicked in, she was begging for some head. Started giving her head, and all the liquor came up, but that really got her going once I threw up all over he privates. Took two more hits, then we went in. We must have his about ten positions on the crass by the highway. Drugs were good.
The funny thing was when it was all said and done, she asked if I'd be around next weekend maybe we can get a hotel. That's the funny part, she thought were were friends all of a sudden. Also by she I mean this Dominican version of a black retired man I was lusting after but he wouldn't give it up as he said he was straight. This nygga dyck was huge, and after that first hit, he bent me over i took all ten inches like a pro. The other funny thing is that things got awkward when he kept on telling me to open my p*ssy up and using spit as lube, but didn't eat my a$$.
Last edited:
AlainLocke
Banned
So I was like 16..and this bytch was like 23
Was at a party...
Her tongue was all down my throat...shyt was
Then she took me to a room, turned off the lights...and bent over...
I ended up putting it in her butt on accident...she was screaming and shyt...but then she was all like don't stop..
People come into the room and turned off the lights and just saw me fukking this bytch...
Some dudes were like...
Some bytches were like...
I was like....
Then a nikka was like I'ma stay and watch and put his dikk in her mouth and was like...
Was at a party...
Her tongue was all down my throat...shyt was
Then she took me to a room, turned off the lights...and bent over...
I ended up putting it in her butt on accident...she was screaming and shyt...but then she was all like don't stop..
People come into the room and turned off the lights and just saw me fukking this bytch...
Some dudes were like...
Some bytches were like...
I was like....
Then a nikka was like I'ma stay and watch and put his dikk in her mouth and was like...
Had a few drinks at the bar, but I was in the mood for something else. Went out for a cigarette, caught my bae for the night with one look.
She asked if I had a big dyck right away, I ignored everything, until we made our way to the park, It was a long walk, cold azz hell in the middle of February. She pulled out some crack, and we picked up some weed on way there. Once it kicked in, she was begging for some head. Started giving her head, and all the liquor came up, but that really got her going once I threw up all over he privates. Took two more hits, then we went in. We must have his about ten positions on the crass by the highway. Drugs were good.
The funny thing was when it was all said and done, she asked if I'd be around next weekend maybe we can get a hotel. That's the funny part, she thought were were friends all of a sudden. Also by she I mean this Dominican version of a black retired man I was lusting after but he wouldn't give it up as he said he was straight. This nygga dyck was huge, and after that first hit, he bent me over i took all ten inches like a pro. The other funny thing is that things got awkward when he kept on telling me to open my p*ssy up and using spit as lube, but didn't eat my a$$.
i got funny stories for days about Harlem and Washington heights at 3 am. sometimes I miss those days.
you sound like a heroin addicted cac
So I was like 16..and this bytch was like 23
Was at a party...
Her tongue was all down my throat...shyt was
Then she took me to a room, turned off the lights...and bent over...
I ended up putting it in her butt on accident...she was screaming and shyt...but then she was all like don't stop..
People come into the room and turned off the lights and just saw me fukking this bytch...
Some dudes were like...
Some bytches were like...
I was like....
Then a nikka was like I'ma stay and watch and put his dikk in her mouth and was like...
Well that was strange...On topic: The first girl that I ever had a sexual interaction with vomited on my dikk....and her booty smelled awful
How dudes do thisSo I was like 16..and this bytch was like 23
Was at a party...
Her tongue was all down my throat...shyt was
Then she took me to a room, turned off the lights...and bent over...
I ended up putting it in her butt on accident...she was screaming and shyt...but then she was all like don't stop..
People come into the room and turned off the lights and just saw me fukking this bytch...
Some dudes were like...
Some bytches were like...
I was like....
Then a nikka was like I'ma stay and watch and put his dikk in her mouth and was like...
How do they mistake an a$$hole for a p*ssy. Explain
of course a square azz coli nygga would say that
Marezzy
RIP my Nikka Zooboomafo 🕊️11-20-2014🕊️
In the middle of sex I'll say crazy shyt for a laugh.
Me:this dikk good ain't it?
Her: yes baby
Me: this dikk good enough for gas money?
Me: ouuu shyt I'm about to nut(really deep voice)
*right when I bust*
Me: moan loud like I'm a white girl pornstar.
One time when I was in the zone and just feeling like I could go all night. I would nut get up do jumping jacks, grab another condom, and jump back in the p*ssy. Good times man good times.
Me:this dikk good ain't it?
Her: yes baby
Me: this dikk good enough for gas money?
Me: ouuu shyt I'm about to nut(really deep voice)
*right when I bust*
Me: moan loud like I'm a white girl pornstar.
One time when I was in the zone and just feeling like I could go all night. I would nut get up do jumping jacks, grab another condom, and jump back in the p*ssy. Good times man good times.
