So what is wrong with settling?

[wet landscapes]

I think settling is great, it's gonna get some girl to marry me one day

 

[Blackout]

A bad effect of settling would be a lady settling for a man with a crappy personality just because he looks good aka is a 9/10 or has a lot of money.

Good way to not settle would be a lady who wont settle until she finds a man that she is at the least attracted to with a good personality.

 

[Remote]

A bad version of settling would be a lady settling for a man with a crappy personality just because he looks good aka is a 9/10 or has money.

Good version would be a lady who wont settle until she finds a man that she is at the least attracted to with a good personality.

Do you think that sort of thing varies with age?

Like, when a person is 19, they want to find someone who puts butterflies in their stomach who they feel infatuated with.
When a person is 35, they probably care less about the butterflies and have a more realistic view of compatibility.

Personally, I see a lot of women my age who look for the type of love that exists when you're a teenager...and I think that's why they continue to be single and overlook a lot of men.

 

[Blackout]

Do you think that sort of thing varies with age?

Like, when a person is 19, they want to find someone who puts butterflies in their stomach who they feel infatuated with.
When a person is 35, they probably care less about the butterflies and have a more realistic view of compatibility.

Personally, I see a lot of women my age who look for the type of love that exists when you're a teenager...and I think that's why they continue to be single and overlook a lot of men.

I agree, during the 20s a good bit of women have bad judgement which is why I think a lot of women end up being single, or single with kids in their 30s because of that lack of good judgement.

 

[MikelArteta]

Scary times

Hell I don't even settle in dating, ive had my time wasted before and not putting anyone through that.

Communication and honesty would improve so much relationships

It's incredibly selfish, especiallly when the other party involved doesn't know. I hate to bring up something as fictitious as a TV SHOW. But before I finished "The Affair" a couple of months ago, I picked up on something that probably happens a lot, and probably has serious marital elements in it.



And in the end it backfired. She went through that whole marriage like she was some prize, like she didn't have to do certain things because he couldn't do better, and he was the one who ended up stepping out . That's the problem with being "safe". You might not put as much effort into it when you think you're the prize in the situation.

 

[iBrowse]

I want to ask my boyfriend what he had to "settle" with me but I know that would be a bad idea

nikka will over think that shyt on some

 

[iBrowse]

Why is he in every relationship thread? But, anyway, nothing is wrong with settling. I'm getting used to the idea that I may not settle down with a fine chocolate stallion But, I'm sure who ever he is won't mind settling down with a Caramel dime such as myself who am I kidding it's going to take a miracle for a man to be content with the nickle that is me Be ugly brehettes

 

[Arianne Martell]

[

nikka will over think that shyt on some

I appreciate honesty

 

[iBrowse]

[





I appreciate honesty

Nah you from the rock y'all crazy

 

[Remote]

[





I appreciate honesty

Doubt it.
99.999% of women don't want the complete honest truth.

 

[Arianne Martell]

Nah you from the rock y'all crazy

Doubt it.
99.999% of women don't want the complete honest truth.

I am more of a realist and mature...so I can handle it...

 

[At30wecashout]

I am more of a realist and mature...so I can handle it...

 

[unit321]

Everyone thinks that it's stupid to "settle" for something or someone in a relationship.

Don't stereotype. Not everyone thinks that.

But really, why is that?

Some do believe in settling. It depends. But for the most part as it pertains to relationships, settling isn't good.

Are people too narcissistic?

Some are. Some aren't.

Do people have an unrealistic view of themselves and think they deserve the best of the best?

Some do. Some don't.

How do you define "settling" anyway?

Settling is accepting someone who isn't your view of what is perfect but thinking you are better.
Accepting someone for who they are without looking down on that person or expecting them to change to your view of perfect isn't settling.

I mean if you would be happy with the Camry, are you gonna keep riding the bike until you can afford the Benz?
Just asking questions to stir discussion.

Some people are willing to stay single until they meet Mr. Right or Miss Right. Or those people usually have unreal expectations and/or believe they can change the person they view as physically perfect. They've got issues.
Settling as it pertains to relationships is dangerous if you are going to make it a lifelong goal to belittle your partner because you believe you are superior. And that goes both ways, female to male and male to female. In a perfect storm relationship, this is where a co-dependent person will latch onto someone who actually wants a co-dependent person because they will do what they say. That's beyond the scope of this thread.

 

[unit321]

I've settled for a Tastycake snack product because there wasn't a Hostess snack product.

 

[Still Benefited]

depends on what you mean by settling,sometimes a person you sidnt think you would ever date comes along and makes you happy and you give that peraon a chance,and yall go on to live happily ever after together.

technically you initially settled....but if that person made you happier then you ever been,are you still "settling".

on the flip you could marry sumboy u THOUGHT was your ideal person,but then be miserable after a couple of years but stay with them anyway out of loyalty....but people dont really consider staying in a situation that makes you miserable "settling" for whatever reason

maybe you was just wrong about what you thought you liked in the first place