No, there is no justification for domestic violence, period. This notion that men have to maintain their composure during domestic disputes while women are free to fly off the handle is potentially dangerous to all parties involved and inherently sexist. Despite our advantage in raw physical strength, we are no more naturally capable of regulating our emotions than women are; all evidence to the contrary is the result of socialization. Women are taught to believe that they are more emotional and behave as such. The only way to achieve the gender equality that feminists claim to fight for is to stop treating women like they are tall children.
While I am sorry that you had to go through such an ordeal, why does being complicit (at least for a time) in your own domestic battery make you more of a man? After reading about your father's reaction to your situation, your attitudes on this topic make more sense.