You know, of my friends in the last ten years, all of them are still my close friends...it's the ones from when I was 10-14 that dissolved, which is still sad to me, and fukks with me a little. Like, the friends from only ten years ago...they are still 100 with me, but the ones who were actually children with me, played at recess, basketball in the front yard, slept over, we all grew up in the same neighborhood.....But, we went to different high schools, and different directions.
I had to go through my little phase, had to get locked up, etc, etc, but the same friends still held me down, through whatever. And the other ones were just not there anymore, not by phone, not by text, not in person. I got everything straightened out, but still in my own lane. I used to think it was all on me, like I was the bad one, now, I feel it's more reflective of them and their character. And at one point, a year ago, I tried to reach out to one, who lives in NY, swallowed my pride, left a fukking voicemail...nothing. The other ones lives here, I called dude when he had his kid, I see him here and there in the old neighborhood, got nothing, hardly even a whats up. The funny shyt is, his Mom, his little brother are more happy to see me then him.