What’s The Point Of Being The Breadwinner in a Relationship

Shadow King

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Have you ever balanced a checkbook? It's basic subtraction and addition. Balancing the household budget was considered secretarial work, and beneath a man's capabilities back then. That's like telling a man to be his own secretary. If you think the modern woman isn't capable of balancing a checkbook, thats a different discussion, but it was standard MO for a wife pre-2000.
In real life, my own grandfather gave te household budget to my grandmother for the very reason I stated. This may not represent every man, but likely more than people care to imagine.

In a fictional work based on periodic reality, Bridgerton shows upper class families and it's the men doing the estate bookkeeping, not the women, unless the man is traveling or deceased. I'm sure this practice applied to families I'm the US also who had money or at least were not poor.

I don't think it's as clear cut or blanketed as a financial balancing being "beneath" a man.
 

Cakebatter

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In real life, my own grandfather gave te household budget to my grandmother for the very reason I stated. This may not represent every man, but likely more than people care to imagine.

In a fictional work based on periodic reality, Bridgerton shows upper class families and it's the men doing the estate bookkeeping, not the women, unless the man is traveling or deceased. I'm sure this practice applied to families I'm the US also who had money or at least were not poor.

I don't think it's as clear cut or blanketed as a financial balancing being "beneath" a man.
Absolutely, the wives of the ultra wealthy were clueless of the financial affairs of the household, but even still the husbands all used accountants, so.... That still doesn't reflect on the other 90% of households. You are looking at it through young breh eyes. Based on these transcripts, I'm clearly much older than you, and was an adult long before building wealth became more than just "Earning more money". I personally know lawyers and Doctors who can't ever remember personally paying a utility bill. I know small business owners whose wives create the business's monthly P&L, Balance Sheets, and Cash Flow charts.

Finances is as simple as earning more than you spend. The bulk of your ROI are being gobbled up by inflation as we speak. If you are marrying a woman who can't handle the household budget, you lost. You can have the last word.
 

Shadow King

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Absolutely, the wives of the ultra wealthy were clueless of the financial affairs of the household, but even still the husbands all used accountants, so.... That still doesn't reflect on the other 90% of households. You are looking at it through young breh eyes. Based on these transcripts, I'm clearly much older than you, and was an adult long before building wealth became more than just "Earning more money". I personally know lawyers and Doctors who can't ever remember personally paying a utility bill. I know small business owners whose wives create the business's monthly P&L, Balance Sheets, and Cash Flow charts.

Finances is as simple as earning more than you spend. The bulk of your ROI are being gobbled up by inflation as we speak. If you are marrying a woman who can't handle the household budget, you lost. You can have the last word.
I figured this would turn into the "you're young and know nothing" trope.

Where did I say anything specifically about "building wealth"? And if these husbands used accountants, seems like bookkeeping is above the heads of these wives. I also never said a woman should not be able to handle a household budget, I questioned the status of the vast majority of men regardless of income simply handing over budgeting duties to his wife.

I'm not marrying in this modern climate of intersex relations but in the 1 in 100000000000000 chance I did, I'm not handing over bookkeeping to her and looking away, even though my income and schedule sees fit that she can stay home and have more time to do so.

Thank you.
 

AllHolosEve

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Why someone gotta come out the pocket the most? Like do you have to or you choose to? Then it becomes a question of why if you don’t have to.

It’s all about the relationship people choose to be in. In the same way, one can choose to pay for everything or most of everything. There’s no rules is what I’m getting at.
-There's only a breadwinner if you live together & share expenses. The person bringing in money & paying the majority of the expenses is the breadwinner, it's that simple. If you don't live together or share expenses there's no breadwinner.

-Yes, it's all about the relationship. Either person can be the breadwinner depending on how you choose to split work & costs. Traditionally it was the man but today more women are doing it.
 

KBtheKey

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"bytch, I'll get all this shyt cut off you keep playing"
"Gone go out with ya lil girlfriends, but yo key ain't gone be turning shyt when you get back"

That's the point. However, if you have to say those things seriously more than twice, you might should bush that hoe anyway
 

Prodyson

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I figured this would turn into the "you're young and know nothing" trope.

Where did I say anything specifically about "building wealth"? And if these husbands used accountants, seems like bookkeeping is above the heads of these wives. I also never said a woman should not be able to handle a household budget, I questioned the status of the vast majority of men regardless of income simply handing over budgeting duties to his wife.

I'm not marrying in this modern climate of intersex relations but in the 1 in 100000000000000 chance I did, I'm not handing over bookkeeping to her and looking away, even though my income and schedule sees fit that she can stay home and have more time to do so.

Thank you.
Seems you just want control (not in a bad way) and that’s fine. My wife handles that stuff. Not because I can’t but because we have different ways of handling finances. She’s a stickler for doing things one way and I don’t really care HOW it’s done as long as it gets done… so I said “here, you can do it how you want.” I also trust her and we use joint bank accounts. So I don’t even worry about it until it’s time to redo our budget (which we do together) or start talking about investments (which I handle). She handles bills and stuff like that on a monthly basis, and I can always go and check the account balances to see where everything’s going… but I don’t do that often.

It’s honestly a weight off my shoulders
 

rabbid

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My Dad is the breadwinner for my step mom and all she does is work minimum wage jobs and go on vacations. Pretty sure they aint fukkking no more as well

My uncle is the breadwinner and told us at dinner, "if i die make sure that bytch dont get shyt, give it to my babygirl". All his wife does is go to Saint Tropez solo or with her girls and likely get her back blown out by French nikkas.

So, i mean all i can do is live my life based on what im seeing, and i refuse to be Mr. Bankroll Fresh for a bish, especially if she not bussing it wide open. Its your choice brehs... but im not seeing to many happy breadwinners. alot of these other nikkas lying and once they've had a few drinks, they start spilling their guts.
 

1thouwow

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Ain’t no breadwinner it’s about holding it down…my wife is in school so I’m holding it down and when she finish she’ll hold it down while I go. Then when I’m done we’ll be holding these haters down :blessed:
If y’all don’t split up before it’s ur turn.
 

TheCPA

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Being the breadwinner is a lose situation for man in this era cause few women understand what a partnership is. Most of them don't care if you work hard for them, they'll leave you whenever is convenient for them.

I work hard to achieve my goals, this year i was able to buy my condo by myself and i just got a promotion which will bring my income to 6 figures. It was hard work to achieve this, so I'm too scared to let some basic women (yes most women are just basic) to destroy all those years of work. I never met a woman who's worth those years of sacrifices.

That's the reason why i only date female who earn the same income or more than me. For me, relationship is a investment. The only way to know a woman is serious about you is when she's ready to put her money at risk by investing with you. Woman are very protective with their purse more than anything, they only open it when they're crazy about you. That's the only way you know she's really love you. If you believe otherwise, then good luck with that.
 

re'up

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I'm just going to throw this story here, I am sure it fits somehow,

A girl friend of mine whom I really truly like and respect, makes money, is a hustler

We were going out every week two years ago, and she says lets do something this weekend, lets go to that hotel you like,

and I say, yeah, that sounds good, are you down to share the cost?

And she gets very offended, and says I am NOT that type of woman, stops our little moment right away

I say, ok, I understand, but do you know how much that place is a night? It's like $1500. If it was $400 or $500, I wouldn't even think twice, but that's like a 2k 24 hours, minimum, if we both share the cost, it makes it easier.


She had no idea how much it cost, which didn't change the outcome, but I was a little surprised at the ideology behind her thinking, that was so rigid.
 
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