Who here has ever transformed/upgraded their lives in a major way???

[Tetris v2.0]

Great thread premise and very needed in these times

Don't have much to add except cutting out my porn addiction did wonders on my interactions with women and ultimately my wife and mother of my children

I still manage to reach into the well every so often, but there's way less shame now that I've processed what it is and what I'm trying to get from this lol

 

[Henny and_ HotWings]

Breh, I was having this exact conversation recently. It’s stubbornness that allowed me to prevail. Yes it has also worked against me at times, as well as getting me into a few a scuffles, but my refusal to take no for an answer has helped me overcome so many obstacles.

When I tell you my initial time in Brooklyn was tough, I had never felt so out of my place in my life. No friends, no network, no women. I was completely isolated.

But me overcoming that showed myself how resilient I was and that year of hardship was a blessing in disguise. It hardened me and made me stronger.

Unfortunately no. I’m not someone who wants to look back. I didn’t do anything egregious to her but I definitely fumbled the bag. The fact she saw potential in me even when I was broke spoke volumes about her character.

I won’t even lie to you, I still regret messing that one up. She wanted us to marry, have children, all of that before we reached 25. She gave me an ultimatum and I said “I’m good”.

It was for the best because I’m sure I would’ve stepped out had we married so young. I didn’t have the emotional maturity I have now that I’m engaged.

Hey man, if you can make it in NY you can make it anywhere…. You really learn just how important money and having game is lol. I have fam from there and I lived in North Jersey 15 min outside of NYC for a few years too so I know it very well

And yeah pride can work against you but sometimes it’s needed… you feel like you have to prove to yourself and others that you made the right decisions…. So you just keep pulling the wagon over the hill

And I feel you man, I don’t like to look back much either. In most cases it’s counter productive…

And that’s good that you had enough self awareness to know you couldn’t marry that young…. I know it was hard for you to let her go but it sounds like it was for the best….

I feel like a lot of people would be better off if they did what you did… so many people try to force themselves into long term relationships or marriages at a young age and then wonder why it doesn’t work out…

In many cases, it just ends up producing single mothers, nikkas on alimony and child support and bitter people who sometimes never recover

 

[Buddy]

Fitness wise I got in the best shape of my life, faint six pack and shyt. Not so much right now but I'm getting back active now that it's warmed up.

Got two pay increases last year, and moved from old place which was seriously taken over by a slum lord and found a new place, two stories I need a lot more money for the shyt I'm tryna do tho

 

[Henny and_ HotWings]

Great thread premise and very needed in these times

Don't have much to add except cutting out my porn addiction did wonders on my interactions with women and ultimately my wife and mother of my children

I still manage to reach into the well every so often, but there's way less shame now that I've processed what it is and what I'm trying to get from this lol

THIS… I look at porn and fapping like drinking alcohol….

Some people can go out have a drink or two, maybe even get drunk but they go home and don’t need to drink again for another week or two, maybe more… they’re pretty much unaffected by it and can manage it with ease. It causes zero issues in their lives….

And then you have others that have some drinks one night and just like that, they’re off to the races and end up going into a crazy drinking binge that last nights, weeks even months… caused then health issues, ruin relationships, deteriorates their health smh

Porn is the same way… some people can run one out sometimes and they’re fine…. Others just tapping once can cause them to go into an addiction infused trance and then end up not being able to stop for years on end and they develop some terrible issues… but that’s w whole mother topic

GOOD FOR YOU FOR GETTING A HANDLE ON IT…. I’m proud of you G… and I’m sure your wife loves the man you are for it

 

[ThrobbingHood]

And that’s good that you had enough self awareness to know you couldn’t marry that young…. I know it was hard for you to let her go but it sounds like it was for the best….

I feel like a lot of people would be better off if they did what you did… so many people try to force themselves into long term relationships or marriages at a young age and then wonder why it doesn’t work out…

And that was close to happening. I loved her but I didn’t want to marry her out of obligation. I felt she deserved it but I knew I wasn’t ready. I didn’t want to end up resenting her for being forced into marriage.

To her credit, she knew what she wanted. She didn’t want to be a long term girlfriend or a baby mama. Most women are happy to be strung along for years, with or without a “shut up” engagement ring.

And those are the kind of women I love: ones who are ambitious and don’t want to remain stagnant. Nothing more unattractive than lazy woman who just goes with the motion. I need a woman who matches my ambition and over a decade later, I finally found one. And I’m not messing this one up.

 

[Henny and_ HotWings]

Fitness wise I got in the best shape of my life, faint six pack and shyt. Not so much right now but I'm getting back active now that it's warmed up.

Got two pay increases last year, and moved from old place which was seriously taken over by a slum lord and found a new place, two stories I need a lot more money for the shyt I'm tryna do tho

Nice! No better feeling than moving to a new place… I live in a good place now, good neighborhood, nice digs, lots of space…. but I’m still renting. But that will change next year… will be getting a mortgage….

And I’m a health and fitness freak… if you have a faint six pack and you’re over the age of 26, your instantly in better shape than a majority of the population! Good shyt G

 

[Henny and_ HotWings]

And that was close to happening. I loved her but I didn’t want to marry her out of obligation. I felt she deserved it but I knew I wasn’t ready. I didn’t want to end up resenting her for being forced into marriage.

To her credit, she knew what she wanted. She didn’t want to be a long term girlfriend or a baby mama. Most women are happy to be strung along for years, with or without a “shut up” engagement ring.

And those are the kind of women I love: ones who are ambitious and don’t want to remain stagnant. Nothing more unattractive than lazy woman who just goes with the motion. I need a woman who matches my ambition and over a decade later, I finally found one. And I’m not messing this one up.

Yes sir…. She was dope for the simple fact she was vey certain of what she expected out of life… sucks she had to give the ultimatum but that’s how many women get their point across unfortunately lol

And bro! You preaching to the choir…. I HATE a lazy broad… it is literally the biggest turn off for me… just one reason why me and my ex broke up… I don’t even like having lazy friends at this point

 

[Fill Collins]

Nice… tell me more about CLEP… I’m not that familiar

Yeah college can be great but you definitely gotta tackle it when your heart is really in it..

CLEP is College Level Examination Program, if you pass a test, you get a course credit

I'm able to do two courses for free this semester, you can get free vouchers if you pass an exam for your class here: Home - Modern States

I knocked public library in my last post, but my library card got me access to this for free too: Main Landing Page

 

[Henny and_ HotWings]

I'm indulging in some creative new hobbies (writing, music, etc.) and I feel more productive than I did this time last year.

Nice, sounds like a step in the right direction.. creative endeavors can also open up your mind in many ways you didn’t think possible…. Who knows, you might end up finding something that puts some bread in your pocket as well!

 

[Cloutius Maximus]

The wild fires? Damn bro I’m sorry to hear that. Hopefully none of your people were harmed….

LA is so damn expensive … what’s your plan for stacking? Do you really love living in LA or are you just comfortable/used to being there at this point?

Yeah my shyt went down in the Eaton fires.

I'm pretty much feeling the bolded. I been here all my life and there's always stuff to do and there are high paying jobs out here which keeps people around. Don't wanna move somewhere with no good jobs and end up stuck. Also with the political situation I'm not trying to go to no red states.

Honestly I'm looking at Massachusetts right now. Vibe is somewhat liberal but more educated and less flashy/shallow. They seem to be doing more for working class folk over California. Cali community colleges should have been free. Not checking for the South outside of NC or maybe Virginia Beach area tbh.

 

[Henny and_ HotWings]

CLEP is College Level Examination Program, if you pass a test, you get a course credit

I'm able to do two courses for free this semester, you can get free vouchers if you pass an exam for your class here: Home - Modern States

I knocked public library in my last post, but my library card got me access to this for free too: Main Landing Page

Ohhhhhh okay, got it. I know what you mean… not sure why I didn’t know what it was when you first mentioned. Good shyt! Sounds like something more people should try…. And this day in age, people underestimate the importance of having a library membership . Because of the internet, so many people feel like going to the library is obsolete but they couldn’t be anymore wrong

 

[Henny and_ HotWings]

Yeah my shyt went down in the Eaton fires.

I'm pretty much feeling the bolded. I been here all my life and there's always stuff to do and there are high paying jobs out here which keeps people around. Don't wanna move somewhere with no good jobs and end up stuck. Also with the political situation I'm not trying to go to no red states.

Honestly I'm looking at Massachusetts right now. Vibe is somewhat liberal but more educated and less flashy/shallow. They seem to be doing more for working class folk over California. Cali community colleges should have been free. Not checking for the South outside of NC or maybe Virginia Beach area tbh.

Sorry to hear about the fire taking your home brother… and I feel you on LA… definitely don’t wanna move somewhere else just to deal with a bunch of bullshyt and low paying jobs…

What parts of MASS you looking into…. I never really thought about MASS… maybe I should have

 

[Koapa]

I remember that moment like yesterday. I just turned 30 and I was making about 65k. I went on a guys memorial day weekend trip to Vegas. Right before that trip, I kept telling myself if I were to leave that work position, I would need a 20% pay increase.

While in Vegas, I met a group of young brothers that were Dentist, Physical Therapist, etc. You could see and hear the success while talking to me. Cool group. I remember coming back home thinking about elevating my life. I changed my dressing style to wear more fitted fly clothes. I kept having success at my old job that year.

Exactly a year later, my old coworker told me about a postion at electricity utility company. That company offered me a 35% pay increase plus a partial bonus. I was gone. 31 years of age is when I felt the level up. One year after being a my new job, I officially starting clocking 100k annually.

 

[Cynic]

As in you made SERIOUS improvement/life changes ….

It could be fitness related, money wise, relationship wise, Lifestyle, education, living situation, business, family related etc etc….

What did you do and how? How long did it take? How old were you?

I feel like there’s so many lost people out there… I was once lost as well…

With the world changing around us at a VERY RAPID pace, this could be beneficial for some brother or sister still fighting in the elements

Too many to count but top 5 is

Learning Portuguese dolo
Strength training to get swole
Mobility training for flexibility
Learning how to market, sell and handle objections
Discovering eth and bitcoin in 2016

 

[patscorpio]

The most major upgrade I've done in my life to date was when I got hired at my previous company

My first job out of grad school did a decent job of updating my income. i went from making 40K as a contractor to about 70K as a full time employee over the span of 4 of the 6 years i worked there. Then i started hitting a professional ceiling and the people that were pushing me along in the company were replaced by people who didn't seem interested in moving me up. Which was crazy because only a handful of people had my actual degrees in the company. It led to a lot of internal problems within my relationship with the higherups in the company and the customer base. Problems that had me pissed nearly every fukking day. It took me a while to find a new gig.

There was a company that had a position open - a Business Analyst position - was something I had turned down twice for interviews by HR because I didn't sound like something for me. Third time they hit me up, I was like why not? Because i was reaching that level of desperation to leave. Did a phone interview and one in person. Got the job all in the span of 9 days. That job levelled me up. I was in my early 30s when i crossed the 6 figure barrier. I got paid monthly so my direct deposit looked crazy . My health benefits were top tier. I got 4 and 5 digit year end bonuses. Quarterly performance bonuses. A corporate credit card. I paid down debt like crazy, car note paid off, got my portfolio in order, savings in order. When I finally felt I could splurge a little after doing all that, man i treated myself . Multiple vacations with my ex. Trips to go see fights. I was eating so well. Making the money I was making did lead to dealing with corporate bullshyt down the line and I left after 4.5 years but it got me to where I felt I needed to be at that point of my life and also to move forward to eventually my current job.