Why do so many men have low self esteem?

[BigMan]

Men don't recieve any positive affirmation for just existing. I know people will pretend we do but we don't. We are worth what we can do for people. So I'm not surprised that the men were very appreciative. This also leads to issues in dating cause we can't recognize when a woman really likes us or cares about us for us or what we can do because no one just says hey i appreciate your presence. At worst it leads to us not being able to accept that love and care because we have never been told we're worthy of it.

this is so key. 100 % on point. i've personally struggled with this.

often, men will push women away and/or unconsciously/consciously damage these women because they are simply uncomfortable with being loved.

 

[KidJSoul]

Many men aren't given advice about how to develop their sex appeal, or feel like they can even be desirable at all.

And the modern economy means that any typical working man is more expendable than in the past.

Add a lack of any useful skills (like being athletic, artistic, etc) and being average or below average looking, and boom.

Also, lack of friends to hold you accountable and discourage pathetic behavior from you when you move out of your parents house. If no one is around to be disappointed in you, it's very easy to have zero self respect.

 

[Menna]

Much respect for sharing your circumstance, and my condolences. I've had a hemorrhoid and have IBS, but other than I've been fortunate enough to mostly have good/clean bill of health.

As for the bolded I'm right there with you and I'm 23. In some respects, it's sobering. I know once Brady and Bron retire I won't have personal/childhood link to either sport anymore. So I won't watch them. Power was the last show I actively watched and once they killed the daughter and started angling toward the son as a main character I stopped caring, and never got invested in another show. All the things I enjoy get ruined by others, so at this point I just expectations. The thing is when you have low/no expectations for others/outcomes you inevitably become more withdrawn/apathetic to others/outcomes, which along with environment and self comprise life.

I more likely than not have mild depression (never been to a therapist), but when things are bad more often then they're good, why would I be optimistic/upbeat from a logical standpoint?

There is no alternative within the confines of logic. If you go the delusional optimism route you just bump your head on the same spots you have countless time prior. All you can do is just find peace of mind/some sense of being content in not caring what happens/how shyt goes.

It is what it is, and it be like that sometimes (most of the time) are my mantras. I just take it day by day and try to knock things off my to-do list and hope as I progress the Ls and Ws become more 50/50. I don't think they will I think over time you just become more adept at dealing with/processing Ls. I've said on other threads on this site, if not for immediate family I probably would off myself because I by and large don't enjoy life. It's really just music that I enjoy, but between the day to day I rarely get to listen to all the unheard albums sitting on my downloads folders.

Sidebar that's somewhat related my good breh, have you ever taken the Meyers Briggs Personality Test?

You are about 10 years younger than me so thats 10 more years to make money invest and set up a low stress life for you to enjoy in your mid 30's and beyond...That is really the only thing I see working/stressing/striving for is making money in the right way for the individual person (not all money is good or safe money) and then learn and experience investing and keep stacking and compounding because if you can buy a home outright in a not so expensive state like South Carolina or TN and you have your investments paying you so you dont gotta get up early and you dont really have to be involved with a manager or anyone and you can do what you want day to day AT LEAST your life is more in your control with your financial freedom and you have low stress and can live out your days...That would be my advice and thats what I did and im prob 5 years away from making it a reality so I get excited about that .... besides health and **family thats all I see there is to be interested about and working for as friends and women come and go as thats what life is people come in and out no ones fault but people end up doing what they want to do and things change... I peeped all this in my late 20's and made the change in this direction...Seeing progress is motivational

Sidebar that's somewhat related my good breh, have you ever taken the Meyers Briggs Personality Test? - Those tests are whatever for me I have been in so many different situation that I learn how to act within the specific situation....I don't say so and so test calls me an introvert so I am not going to this large party...If I am an introvert I can go to the party with alot of people and do my thing and then go eat alone or If I am in a business deal where I can make good money or connection ... fukk an introvert I can be an extrovert for appearances and get the job done...I dont classify myself as one or the other I just see what situation I want to be in and then act within the situation the best way i can...If your tired and want to be alone and a dime approaches you are you goin to say I want to be alone right now??? Nah you put it on her...react to the situation brah...life gives you situation it doesnt care about what personality tests results you have you gotta adapt dont do things that classify you as something and then believe you are that something learn the skills to get what you want and go after it...don't colonize yourself lol

 

[Bossino]

You are about 10 years younger than me so thats 10 more years to make money invest and set up a low stress life for you to enjoy in your mid 30's and beyond...That is really the only thing I see working/stressing/striving for is making money in the right way for the individual person (not all money is good or safe money) and then learn and experience investing and keep stacking and compounding because if you can buy a home outright in a not so expensive state like South Carolina or TN and you have your investments paying you so you dont gotta get up early and you dont really have to be involved with a manager or anyone and you can do what you want day to day AT LEAST your life is more in your control with your financial freedom and you have low stress and can live out your days...That would be my advice and thats what I did and im prob 5 years away from making it a reality so I get excited about that .... besides health and **family thats all I see there is to be interested about and working for as friends and women come and go as thats what life is people come in and out no ones fault but people end up doing what they want to do and things change... I peeped all this in my late 20's and made the change in this direction...Seeing progress is motivational

Sidebar that's somewhat related my good breh, have you ever taken the Meyers Briggs Personality Test? - Those tests are whatever for me I have been in so many different situation that I learn how to act within the specific situation....I don't say so and so test calls me an introvert so I am not going to this large party...If I am an introvert I can go to the party with alot of people and do my thing and then go eat alone or If I am in a business deal where I can make good money or connection ... fukk an introvert I can be an extrovert for appearances and get the job done...I dont classify myself as one or the other I just see what situation I want to be in and then act within the situation the best way i can...If your tired and want to be alone and a dime approaches you are you goin to say I want to be alone right now??? Nah you put it on her...react to the situation brah...life gives you situation it doesnt care about what personality tests results you have you gotta adapt dont do things that classify you as something and then believe you are that something learn the skills to get what you want and go after it...don't colonize yourself lol

To the first half, that's the plan I want independence, and peace of mind. To the second half I'm the same in the sense that I'm who the situation calls me to be, but we all have preferences on what we'd rather be/rather do if we had complete autonomy. I'm very personable and many think I'm extrovert but I don't like (not necessarily hate, just would rather not deal with) most people, so I'm an introvert. I was just asking to compare our personalities along with our mindsets. Though I thoroughly hav appreciated the dialogue

 

[Mowgli]

Out of shape
Broke
Small penis
Antisocial

Take your pick

 

[semicko82]

Because men are told that they are disposable.

That they have to sacrifice themselves for the betterment of society.

I could go on.

Bingo

 

[DaHNIC82]

Feminism, social media, the slow decline of lifestyle of the average man in Western society is the real answer. Most porn is trash and the best looking women don’t even do porn most of the time. Porn is like a weak primitive virtual reality that is ultimately highly unsatisfying. The real question is why do men feel the need to escape in porn?

Women outnumber men in the workforce. That right there tells you men have been emasculated. America is the world’s first post-industrial nation. There are tens of millions of less good jobs that were mostly entirely performed by men (i.e. factory jobs) there were here some decades ago. But America is the land of taking personal accountability even when it doesn’t make sense... so we are told it’s our fault that when we can’t pull ourselves up by our bootstraps because we lack the resources to do so. The term “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” was actually meant to sound preposterous because it is. You can do everything society tells you to do to succeed as a man and still end up a failure. Why? I’ll tel, you why...

Men are taught to look at women as equals in every shape, form or fashion when men and women are NOT equal physically or emotionally. Because of this men have been pussified. Men and women competing for the same jobs that women will always be hired over because these jobs are non physical jobs reserved for women. Millions of women literally do not need men for anything but sex in the modern era because women have their own jobs, careers and money. This is why there is rampant hypergamy today. Social media magnifies this.

Not too long ago, the baddest bytch in school would get pregnant or wifed up by some local nikka. That still happens, but now social media has expanded people’s social networks to be far reaching. The baddest bytch in school can now be the baddest bytch on IG, OnlyFans or TikTok.

Average women have also been taught to monetize their sexuality in recent years. That’s what behind the normalization of average women getting BBL, lipo, breast aug. And men don’t complain. Most of the most popular women in Hollywood and social media are build a bytches. Poorly built obviously fake build a bytches at that.

5 star post

 

[Lord_nikon]

bottle farts

 

[You Win Perfect]

Men don't recieve any positive affirmation for just existing. I know people will pretend we do but we don't. We are worth what we can do for people. So I'm not surprised that the men were very appreciative. This also leads to issues in dating cause we can't recognize when a woman really likes us or cares about us for us or what we can do because no one just says hey i appreciate your presence. At worst it leads to us not being able to accept that love and care because we have never been told we're worthy of it.

nah this is dead on. would rep if i could.

 

[BushidoBrown]

We got nikkas buying bathwater and bottle farts.

the fact that a woman would even THINK that this type of bullshyt was acceptable, let alone act on and go through with it is everything thats wrong with (western?) society


imagine at career day she telling her child's classmates that she makes a living selling her farts bottled up
man get these bum bytches outta here

 

[semicko82]

Men need to stop comparing their life and experiences to other men.
We all have our paths in life.
A young man might think he's a failure because he's not living a Drake or Future lifestyle, but you have to figure out your role in the grand scheme of things

 

[You Win Perfect]

Men need to stop comparing their life and experiences to other men.
We all have our paths in life.
A young man might think he's a failure because he's not living a Drake or Future lifestyle, but you have to figure out your role in the grand scheme of things

thats not what men are doing. and we don't give a fukk about drake or future

 

[semicko82]

thats not what men are doing. and we don't give a fukk about drake or future

Well let me correct it "some men"

 

[Capitol]

this is so key. 100 % on point. i've personally struggled with this.

often, men will push women away and/or unconsciously/consciously damage these women because they are simply uncomfortable with being loved.

I noticed this a lot lately. I had instances where I didn't understand why someone would even want to love me or be around me so it would leave the other person kinda drifting in the wind unable to connect like they wanted to. To this day its hard to recognize the real for the fake

 

[Geek Nasty]

This is why I'm always talking about Agenda. I'm old enough to see the transition. Younger male generations are all being fed subconscious messages that being a straight man is inherently wrong. Like you're an annoying necessity to women. It's little shyt too like the white doll experiment. By the time you're teenagers you've been indoctrinated.

Just thinking about a couple commercials lately. One is that life insurance one where the wife is yelling at her husband like he's a child for not finding a plan "but I was looking for a good deal "

Or that Medusa commercial, dude smiles at a woman the whole table scoffs at him like "how dare you inconvenience us with your attention (turns him to stone)"

Of course that Gillette commercial