Am I Wrong and/or an @$$hole for This?: Had to curb some old friends from high school...

[KravenMorehead™]

"A thug changes, and love changes, and cac friends become strangers, word up..."

 

[HookersandIceCream]

This weirdo never had friends

 

[martin payne]

I've recycled my group of friends so many times since high school/college

I now talk to exactly 0 people from high school

its natural that your likes/dislikes will change as you get older

 

[Heafcliffe]

I've gone through that too.
When I was single and struggling and walking to work...my pops side of the family LOVED me. They loved being able to look down on me and pity me and say "Awwww...poor little Behind-The-Wheel...we'll help you".
But after I got on board with the govt and started getting paid, got married and successful...all they do is hate!
Won't reply to calls or texts, won't inform me of family get togethers, won't visit, nothing. They drive 800 miles to come see my relative that lives down the highway from me, but never come by to see me...im less than 15 miles away.

That's ok...I'm good either way bytches.
See you fake fukks at the next funeral...and don't ask me for shyt!


So now I only talk to two people on my pops side of the family...basically my brother and my pop...that's it.
The rest of them are dead to me.

Breh, join me in this dap.

We on the same page! We live in DC (tiny city) and they don't talk to my wife or I nor my brother and his wife.

Thing is my brother and I, despite a tough upbringing, we work hard and don't carry it like we better than anyone. Now, we're both college-educated, work & thrive in the gov't, have educated wives (both have Masters) and we outchea giving back to our communities.

Not a snub to the other side of the "family" but them? They sheisty (raising sheisty kids), have many internal conflicts with their spouses (cheating, bankruptcy) and thrive on a scheme or two (insurance come-ups). AND subscribe to what I call "facade purchases." Latest cars, newest clothes but when the bill (and holidays) comes around, they broke. They can keep that.

These last 5 to 6 years without them have been nothing but a .

 

[Behind-the-wheel]

Breh, join me in this dap.

We on the same page! We live in DC (tiny city) and they don't talk to my wife or I nor my brother and his wife.

Thing is my brother and I, despite a tough upbringing, we work hard and don't carry it like we better than anyone. Now, we're both college-educated, work & thrive in the gov't, have educated wives (both have Masters) and we outchea giving back to our communities.

Not a snub to the other side of the "family" but them? They sheisty (raising sheisty kids), have many internal conflicts with their spouses (cheating, bankruptcy) and thrive on a scheme or two (insurance come-ups). AND subscribe to what I call "facade purchases." Latest cars, newest clothes but when the bill (and holidays) comes around, they broke. They can keep that.

These last 5 to 6 years without them have been nothing but a .

Holy shyt breh....you're like a twin brotha from another mother.

My wife and I are in the same position and that's the exact same mess I have with my pops side. They do everything for the lazy dumbasses in the family that ain't doing shyt with themselves.
Check this...
My pop had the nerve to BUY my cousin a damn fixer-upper home in Baltimore...all he had to do was make the 350 a month payment. Pops lined him up with tenants to give him over $2000 a month in rent in the house.

The fool couldn't even handle that! Running around buying expensive worthless crap and riding everywhere trying to impress other people, lettin his tenants stay for free.
Lost the house.


Meanwhile, my wife and I bought our home and vehicles on our own with our money we saved and the good credit we earned. My pops hasnt bought me anything substantial, but gave my cousin a damn house, my siblings cars and housing and they ain't gotta work. Aunts and uncles constantly bailing out cousins and siblings and sending em money and checkin up on em.

Its like this pathetic little circle of ineptitude or something.


I know it ain't right, but I'm anxiously waiting on the day when my pops and aunts and uncles all die off and my shiftless cousins and siblings get put out on the streets. Them fukks better not call my phone or ring my doorbell or I'm answering back with my axe.

Lazy fukks have had everything given to them their whole lives and they STILL manage to fukk it up.
My mom gave me a small boost back in 2001 and I took that shyt and FLEW with it to become the successful stable man that I am today (With Gods help and support).

People try to tell me that my pops side of the family don't follow up on me because I don't need it while the others do.

Man please...that don't mean I don't need love, concern, care, communication, family and being a part of things. So I say again...fukk YOU to all them punks.
I'll see em at the next family funeral.

 

[Formerly Black Trash]

Sounds like you hating because they did better in school than you did

 

[Unknown Poster]

No you did the right thing. Some of your story sounds like mine. The difference I grew up in the hood about mostly black people. So I was pretty much semi-woke the whole time I went to a PWI. I still made some white friends while there, and that's where I'm similar to your story. We all start from the same place post college, they all get them white people rockets on they back while I'm dealing cism related stuff career wise. And the funniest part is these nepotism/white privilege babies try to tell me what i'm doing wrong, when most of them got their money up via family members giving them jobs, or them "knowing the right people"...aka their dad knew a guy.

Its like white people all hit about 27 or 28 and that republican come right up on outta them. It's like "well, I'm done slumming it and doing drugs now it's time for me to fall into this white supremacy". Cuz funny enough nearly all the white people I know/knew were junkies, all did pills, coke, etc....but of course they never get targeted so they get to do that shyt and clean up when they feel like it. If they don't say racist shyt it's their little buddies from their hometown saying it.

Kick em to the curb. I did the same thing, OP. Kicked a lot of people I thought were friends to the curb. Alot of them almost did it themselves once I really started talkin that black empowerment shyt.

Don't even trip

The reason they even contacted me (I haven't seen these cats or talked to them in years), was cause I made a video calling out racism in the music industry. And my former friend says "great video even though the subject matter was depressing". And I'm like "what? this is the shyt I go through..." just all pissed and stuff.

I don't have time to deal with that shyt anymore, seriously. My life is great and I don't want people I don't want in my life trying to follow me and act like we're still cool.

Last time I saw this guy in particular was years ago. Went to his wedding in Arizona...was the only black guy there at the wedding. Never felt so uncomfortable. And he got some mini-mansion out in Scottsdale and
a six figure paying job...meanwhile last year I was sleeping in my car and trying to keep a roof over my head in NYC....for 8 months.


Especially with everything that has happened lately, I just cannot bring myself to even associate myself with these people anymore.

 

[Unknown Poster]

one dude i went to HS with hit me up after not speaking to him for a decade...i ignored his ass.....speak to him for what?

Those are the worst....

That's why I deleted my facebook. I'm not trying to put myself out there like that, and I'm not about being fake and pretending that me & anybody from high school still have anything to talk about.

 

[Unknown Poster]

Sounds like you hating because they did better in school than you did

I graduated with two degrees and a 3.9 GPA

I made dean's list my graduating semester....stop assuming you know people's lives from text posts. You don't even know what I'm wearing right now or what color shirt I have on.
shyt is pathetic!!!!!!
I did three radio shows in college, and an internship. And have an extensive resume with everything ranging from assistant director of a community mural program, to owning and operating a shop in the LES during fashion week and managing a staff. I worked harder in college...they just coasted on white privilege and connections.

The tension began cause they had real world success quicker...were able to get jobs while I was getting doors closed in my face, I don't even want to go into it.

 

[It is a mystery]

Caring about people all the way back from highschool in 2016

 

[Ineedmoney504]

Y'all always get hurt having these white friends. Y'all don't get it blood.

 

[director_of_bands]

Im too old for friends fck I look like worried about somebody befriending me...now if you wanna smoke then stop through we can kick it watch the game or something

 

[ridedolo]

i feel u op. honestly at this point i think its best for blacks and whites to be completely separate, at the very minimum for 100 years.

 

[WaveGang]

don't fukk with people who make u feel uncomfortable. end of story.

Underrated post

 

[Ghetto Denizen]

Ok...if you been following my posts...you know I grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood and went to predominantly white schools until graduation and moved to NYC.

Used to have a circle of friends where I was the token black guy around mostly white guys. And honestly since the past 8 years....I just can't fukk with them anymore on any sort of level. All of my new friends I've made in NYC (mostly black and spanish) I connect to alot more and can talk about things I couldn't talk with them. As cruel as it sounds...I have been making a concentrated effort to erase my past & focus on my present and that includes people I once knew. I can't relate to them or their lives. We have nothing in common anymore. Just based off my current circle of friends they don't fit in anywhere in the equation.

The main reason I can't fukk with them anymore is because of how different our lives went once we all went to college and graduated. They all got good jobs in corporate shortly after school and have houses, cars, wives, families...I visited them in the past and we went to spots where it was mostly and I just felt uncomfortable in Scottsdale/PHX and Baltimore. Meanwhile I struggled to finish college at a shytty PWI...felt alienated...had to work 5 times as hard for half the results, finally graduated...then moved...only to deal with unemployment, job discrimination, housing discrimination, underemployment, homelessness, and finally some success. But it was the fact we started at the same point and they were able to get ahead more while I struggled that just got to me.

And honestly back then they would be on some lowkey that I didn't pick up on until I was older and more educated & "woke" so to speak....this one dude I used to hang out with made a joke when we were at a concert about announcing the George Zimmerman/Trayvon Martin verdict at the show...and would make these Trayvon jokes....

shortly after that verdict i deleted my facebook...pretty telling them cats "I'm gone don't find me"



well the other day two of them texted me....I went off on one of them...especiallly after reading on all of these police shootings on tape on twitter and here...I told him to fukk off and that he was a racist and i basically don't associate with his kind.

The other texted me two days ago and since I didn't respond immediately it would be weird to now and i don't know what to say. I might just delete them.

So am I in the wrong here? Or...

Damn breh, where did you go in Baltimore that you felt uncomfortable?

And I hear you breh, had to cut off like a whole clique of cacs because anytime we'd hang out I'd be the only black person. Hell in any situation where I'm the only minority I just excuse myself.