Anybody on child support?

[Swirv]

I would love this, it's the dream set up...

I think my first BM would be less restrictive of when i can see the girls if the other guy wasnt around. I've learned from both (though my second BM is now single again) that they are heavily influenced, wrongly, when another man is in the picture...

My second BM is a bit less restrictive in general. I really, really would love to have a perfect verbal arrangement without going thru court. Given what I laid out in my previous post though, do you think I should go thru with the custody claim or continue to try to work verbally?

For the record, both have done well recently with letting me see the girls. I haven't really had an issue with one of them playing me in 8+ months, but I guess I still have trauma from when they've both done so in the past...

Also the fact that all 3 of us are pondering a move out of state, that's factoring into my thoughts. Even in the event we all remain in NC, I want to feel confident I get my kids, but I would say with this being something all 3 of us are considering, it's feasible at least one of us are leaving NC soon...

How do you get along with the new men in there lives? Sometimes he can be an ally if you go about a certain way.

If you can keep it out of the courts, good. Try to appeal to them as a parent and wanting what’s best for everybody under the circumstances. Let them know that you gave them child support for their peace of mind, now you need piece of mind too.

If they won’t reason with you, analyze all the weak points in your life because if you take them to court, they will drill them into the judge’s head, and you’ll need a counter for them.

 

[murksiderock]

How do you get along with the new men in there lives? Sometimes he can be an ally if you go about a certain way.

If you can keep it out of the courts, good. Try to appeal to them as a parent and wanting what’s best for everybody under the circumstances. Let them know that you gave them child support for their peace of mind, now you need piece of mind too.

If they won’t reason with you, analyze all the weak points in your life because if you take them to court, they will drill them into the judge’s head, and you’ll need a counter for them.

Don't get along with my first BM's at all, he's violated several times over the last 4 years, overstepping boundaries, and she's created the atmosphere for him to do so...

My second BM is single again but I didn't get along with her recent ex...

That last paragraph you write was a profound nugget. Because I've been shytted on for not doing their hair correctly, letting them eat dessert in lieu of dinner, and always traveling out of town for work. Which for me, these are easily explainable: I'm a man, not a woman or a hairdresser so I do the best I can; I don't "force" my daughters to eat, philosophically. If my girls say they aren't hungry, or won't eat, I don't make them...

If they eat some of what I give them, but not all, but will eat some dessert, I'm pkay with the fact they've eaten. And I travel to make a living, they know that, I'm not absent from my kids' lives...

But your last paragraph makes me think these things would come up in court and work against me...

 

[Swirv]

Don't get along with my first BM's at all, he's violated several times over the last 4 years, overstepping boundaries, and she's created the atmosphere for him to do so...

My second BM is single again but I didn't get along with her recent ex...

That last paragraph you write was a profound nugget. Because I've been shytted on for not doing their hair correctly, letting them eat dessert in lieu of dinner, and always traveling out of town for work. Which for me, these are easily explainable: I'm a man, not a woman or a hairdresser so I do the best I can; I don't "force" my daughters to eat, philosophically. If my girls say they aren't hungry, or won't eat, I don't make them...

If they eat some of what I give them, but not all, but will eat some dessert, I'm pkay with the fact they've eaten. And I travel to make a living, they know that, I'm not absent from my kids' lives...

But your last paragraph makes me think these things would come up in court and work against me...

Glad I helped you in some way.

I’ve learned that children need stability, and I think all things being equal, the court will place a child where they believe that can be achieved more readily.

 

[lib123]

Wow I recently learned some people have such toxic relationships with their BM or BD that they only communicate to each other through some sort of co-parenting app to avoid blowups? Do you or anyone you know use this app?

 

[MaxPain]

Tell me what you going through?

You got one of them mangos pregnant didn’t you?

Guess you silver surfed yo ass into a payment plan….