Anybody on child support?

[SouthernBelle]

I'm not giving anyone a pass. Food is a basic necessity for anyone. It should be in the household regardless. There is a reason they have the terms custodial and non custodial. A custodial has rights the non custodial does not. But then at the same time everything is 50/50 right. Wrong. The custodial doesn't fork over anything even when the kid is in the custody of the non custodial no matter the time frame. I have my kid the whole summer. Do you think I seek out any type of support from her mother. Should she be responsible for half of the the expenses for our kid those months. The courts certainly don't, and neither does she. They don't even suspend the CS for those months.

And again I am not saying the money I contribute shouldn't go towards groceries but it should not be expected to be 50% of the grocery bill for the house either. Nor transportation. Those are basic things her mother should be able to cover on her own.

Its funny that people want to argue that everything should be split when it comes to the kid. But let us get on a custody battle and see if these same people preach the samething.

I have no issue with 50/50 custody and I've advocated for it in many custody battle threads on other boards I post on.

 

[Kalik]

You pay for just about everything. That summer camp thing is trife. Does she work?

She works... but her money is for her. Due to the fact when we were married she was a housewife for the last 5 years (of the ten), so any money she makes I don't see it going on my kids.

:bronshrug:

 

[Rockstar Mom]

No issues with joint custody either

 

[xd21]

Tell me what you going through?

Well, I have standard visitations for my daughter and I also pay $750 a month in child support along with $50 for Medicaid.

She tried to keep my daughter away from me for two years and I took her ass to court and got my rights back .

 

[Buckeye Fever]

how can you just generalize something you really know nothing about, I was paying whatever I could whenever it was needed before I got put on child support, and my son was from a one night by the way, which doesnt matter I hold myself accountable and responsible, the reason I was put on child support is because she didnt want to have to ask for money but know it would just be there, which is fine because I believe not living in the home I should pay something, but to be called the lowest man in society wow, that seems amazing how you can put every man in one category, peace and love to you anyways breh

Yeah, that "lowest man in society" was some of the dumbest shyt ive heard on here. Especially when u got dudes that have kids and dont acknowledge them.

I know a nikka that got a few kids under 18. As of right now, them baby mamas aint said shyt, but if they see that he workin, doin all this overtime,

 

[MikelArteta]

the only thing i have to say is be careful men, ive seen it with my own eyes, baby mom acting nice cuz she thinks y';all gonna be a happy family one day , so you dont give teh full child support n she says nothing , no custody right up etc., then bam you start dating and she gets angry as hell and suddenly them papers at your door, your wages being garnished (hr /payroll hates this), and your screwed

 

[Buckeye Fever]

@Kalik and @Rockstar Mom

 

[twan83]

if the money for child support is being used right nobody would have a problem with it cuz they know their kid is being taken care of properly and see its worth the money for that kid too get

but when that money is being abused and going elsewhere it becomes a problem

and especially when that person pulls that u can't see the kids stunt


there is no safe or sure bet way who u are with that u will stay together shyt happens and all u can do is be there for your kid as best as possible and set a good example and standard that your child as they get older surpasses you in

its just really difficult when one of the parents acts like an a$$hole that complicates things and makes the whole situation more difficult than it needs to be instead of the doing the right thing and doing right by that kid

 

[Numpsay]

OK yea you're in Texas boo.

In in NYC. Cost of living and cost period are on another level from u, off top.

And there's a difference between me and u. I would give my son everything and more, no questions asked. If roles were reversed, it will be the same. I wouldn't be on CS, because I would willingly do for my child.

I would live more than comfortably in NY with my kid with no assistance from her mother. And my lil girl gets everything and more than she can ask for on both ends. But just because that is the case that doesn't mean the process or the money can't be scrutinized and that's all we are debating here. You keep trying to turn this into men not wanting to pay and that isn't even the argument most people are making here. And I'm no different from you and based on your list Id wager I spend more on mine throughout the year than you do and that isn't including my CS payments. Mainly because I don't have my hand out for half of my expenses for my daughter from her mother.

 

[Rockstar Mom]

Hand out means I beg.

I don't beg.

His father does willingly.


So what exactly is the argument? Seems like people not wanting to give a certain amount. When it should be no questions asked, cuz its supposed to be anything for your kid.

 

[R.E.N. Spells Ren]

go to your local barber shop.

the stories

All I know is black baby mama's are the WORST.
believe me when I tell you I have seen grown men cry talking about child support.....

Yea and I've heard the stories from the other side....there's some deplorable men out there.

People, both male and female, turn into terrible human beings when money is involved and it's sad.

 

[ThumpDaddy]

It's a sad case because money can and will ruin everything. People that know my story know that my daughter lives with me. Not because I have a trifling baby mama even though she is, but because I know in my heart that I would be the better parent. She talked a good game when we was together but when we broke up and I kept our daughter, she showed how trifling she is. I think that since my daughter has been on this earth and it will be 9 years on the 10th of April. I have probably received a total of $100 dollars towards my daughter's well being from her mother. I don't care because our daughter living with me is the best thing for her.

Even now she sees her every 3 weeks and it's for one day. Maybe things would have been better if my daughter's mother wasn't so trifling but while y'all talking about who do for who or who does what, I don't even argue. My wife(no children)and I do 100%. We bathe, clothe, feed, take my daughter to school, to the doctor, to the dentist, buy school supplies, pay for cheerleading, summer camp, fund her college account, pay for her hair, furniture, birthday parties, Christmas, Easter, and well you guys get the point. I don't receive any help from her mother. And to tell you the truth, I don't want any help from her. And when I can I get her little sister because she wants to spend time with her. The killing part is that neither my daughter's mother nor her father does anything for the little sister.

I feel like I do what I'm supposed to do and that's the way it should be. I hate to hear the stories of how child support has damaged the relationships between children and their parents. Not saying that child support is wrong, because some people need to be on it, but the whole concept needs to be set up to be less bias.

 

[SouthernBelle]

It's a sad case because money can and will ruin everything. People that know my story know that my daughter lives with me. Not because I have a trifling baby mama even though she is, but because I know in my heart that I would be the better parent. She talked a good game when we was together but when we broke up and I kept our daughter, she showed how trifling she is. I think that since my daughter has been on this earth and it will be 9 years on the 10th of April. I have probably received a total of $100 dollars towards my daughter's well being from her mother. I don't care because our daughter living with me is the best thing for her.

Even now she sees her every 3 weeks and it's for one day. Maybe things would have been better if my daughter's mother wasn't so trifling but while y'all talking about who do for who or who does what, I don't even argue. My wife(no children)and I do 100%. We bathe, clothe, feed, take my daughter to school, to the doctor, to the dentist, buy school supplies, pay for cheerleading, summer camp, fund her college account, pay for her hair, furniture, birthday parties, Christmas, Easter, and well you guys get the point. I don't receive any help from her mother. And to tell you the truth, I don't want any help from her. And when I can I get her little sister because she wants to spend time with her. The killing part is that neither my daughter's mother nor her father does anything for the little sister.

I feel like I do what I'm supposed to do and that's the way it should be. I hate to hear the stories of how child support has damaged the relationships between children and their parents. Not saying that child support is wrong, because some people need to be on it, but the whole concept needs to be set up to be less bias.

Have you taken her to court for child support? I know you may not "need" it, but it is her responsibility to contribute (court enforced or not)

 

[↓R↑LYB]

So damn glad I gotta vasectomy breh I never gotta worry bout this shyt.

On the real though I'd get custody of my kids, even if I'd have to make em motherless children

here in texas its 20% for 1 child of your gross, not net income, for those of you with kids, dont pay the mother even if things are cool, because the court wont count any of that. Your best bet is to put yourself on child support. My cousin lucked out he went to court to put himself on child support, and they asked his ex, did she want about 2 yrs worth of back CS because he was just writing her checks, the amount would have been over $4,0000 but she said no. He pays $492 a month for his daughter and has her on his insurance which was already the case when him and the ex were still together. he gets the money taken directly out of his paycheck by way of the AG's office so no worries about no paying or the woman lying and saying he doesnt pay.

I'd be paying 4 grand a month on the low end

 

[↓R↑LYB]

Cats who don't have kids aren't really qualified to speak on this.

Let me explain the ugly truth

Once you have a kid with a woman, you are at her mercy.

Keeping a 2 parent household.... do you really think you have complete control over that?

What are you going to do if this woman one day decides that she doesn't want to be with you anymore and take the kids?

Do you really think you're gonna win custody of the kids? And yes, they will make you pay child support while you are in court for this.

And just because a father pays child support doesn't make him a dead beat or irresponsible. I could give this woman money all day long to take care of my kids, she can still go to court and ask for child support. This is what some of you fail to understand, and I know it's because you don't have children.

Courts don't care what you've done. If you don't have receipts, it didn't happen. Then some of you will say "That's cause you picked the wrong women"

Once again, you say this because you don't have kids. Women change once they have kids. This is well known to all of us who have kids, who went from the priority to "oh my baby comes first".

Once that women decides to leave, you are at her mercy. It's that simple... and you will be paying child support. You'll be kissing ass to make it work, and to avoid child support, which sadly is what most dudes do.

Of course, we would all like to have great relationships and raise our kids as a family. But if you and that woman split, you gotta think really hard about being able to handle supporting the kids without getting the courts involved. Will she never flip on you? Can you just take care of your kids without giving her money and will she be okay with it? Are you paying her straight cash? Are you keeping receipts? 9 out of 10 times, when the parents aren't together it never ends well, meaning that you'll probably be on child support... feeling betrayed that you held it down for your kids and still got screwed.

I just feel it's better to avoid all of that upfront. Yall could still have an understanding, but she can't legally hurt you because it's all settled. And as a man who really cares about his kids, you will have an innate desire to take care of your kids regardless.

I pay child support, and I still spend bread on my kid, and I spend way more than she gets for child support... but I don't have to give that money to her. She gets her measly $700 a month. She can't ask for anything else or hold anything over my head.

I'm more stressfree than those dudes walking on eggshells hoping she doesn't put them on papers or the dude unhappy at home, but afraid to leave because she'll put him on child support.

Not me.

I celebrate brehs

Kill her

I don't know why some of y'all don't exercise the option of murder. I know I'd sure as hell do it.