I learned early on what Valentine's Day was all about, and it proved to be a valuable life lesson for a young niglet. In my HS, we had this thing called Flower Day, which was right around Valentine's. You would buy flowers and have them delivered to some girl's homeroom. Red was love, I think yellow was secret admirer, and white was for friendship. You could also write a little note to go with them. So freshman year, I had my eye on this cute lil Chinese number, and I figured Flower Day would be the perfect opportunity to seal the deal. I took my cheap lil allowance and blew half of it on five red flowers. I imagined that after homeroom, the crowds would part and she would see me and come running into my arms (even now I have to

at how naive I was) and she would be forever mine. So Flower Day comes and I'm anxious for homeroom to come; the bell rings, and I look for her in the hallway. I see her, and this trick has a veritable bouquet of like 20-30 flowers, ALL RED, so I immediately knew that there was other roosters in the henhouse....

I also seen my allowance growing wings and flying away, and almost immediately I felt a cold loathing for this "disloyal" heifer.
The true ether came later that week when my allowance had run out, but the homies was tryna hit the movies. So I stepped to my pops and asked for some bread. He immediately said, "I gave you ya allowance already

" So I explain to him about Flower Day at school and how I bought these flowers for this girl...
Pops: "So you got a girlfriend now?"

Me: "Nah"

Pops: "So you spent ya money, and ain't even come out of it with a girlfriend?"

Me:


Pops:



I learned though... Next year lil funky broad had the gall to ask me if I was buying her flowers AGAIN.... Hit her with the

face and asked her why I should waste my money on her