Black people need more patriarchy not less

[Savvir]

shyt ain't as simple as yall make it out to be. Young women in general are already gullible to begin with. Ciara grew up a sheltered square in the suburbs, you think her young ass had the understanding let alone the presence of mind to be checkin nikkas credentials to see who's solid?

Hindsight is always 20/20, in 2020 it's easy for a bunch of grown ass men who grew up in the hood understanding and observing what real street nikkas are to mark a nikka who constantly shows his ass and takes self inflicted L's broadcasted on social media for the mark he is. As opposed to the days when the greatest amount of exposure you had to artists were in controlled spaces like music videos, interviews, and award shows. I'd be willing to bet to young naive ass ciara back then, bow wow or 50 cent, it was all the same to her. Some popular rap nikkas, all in the videos, dipped in urban attire, making music she likes, selling an image.

You see when she actually dated him and realized beyond the gloss the nikka was a mark all along, she moved on and "graduated" to 50 cent, a real street nikka?

Then she realized 50 cent and future were marks and found a real nikka in Russ?

 

[Black Steph Curry]

Then she realized 50 cent and future were marks and found a real nikka in Russ?

Alot of women peep game real quick when the biological clock is ticking, and an out of wedlock baby exposes the true character of the nikkas they thought were so cool. They priorities switch up real quick and that renegade shyt goes out the window, then it's serious time.

She threw up a hail mary for the one time and Russell caught what she was throwing. The end.

 

[BlackJesus]

you explicitly stated yourself that your "real question" is has matriarchy worked for us. my only argument has been that we do not exist in a matriarchy, and attempting to say that is disingenuous, implies a fundamental misunderstanding of what a matriarchy is, and will not lead to any productive discussion or solutions

the title of your own thread is black people need more patriarchy, which tells me that you don't even know what a patriarchy is.

.

No I think it is you who does not understand what patriarchy is, here is the actual dictionary definition:

a system of society or government in which the father or eldest male is head of the family and descent is traced through the male line.

- Dictionary.com

As our families and homes are headed by women, it’s pretty clear going by the actual definition of patriarchy black Americans don’t live in one!

This nonsense about living in general American society and under American patriarchy is merely a smokescreen you’ve thrown up to distract and disorient.

Your argument is laughable. You are clearly the disingenuous one. And now your whole argument falls apart because you didn’t bother to read a dictionary.

 

[Savvir]

Alot of women peep game real quick when the biological clock is ticking, and an out of wedlock baby exposes the true character of the nikkas they thought were so cool. They priorities switch up real quick and that renegade shyt goes out the window, then it's serious time.

She threw up a hail mary for the one time and Russell caught what she was throwing. The end.

so you're saying young women arent able to determine which men are a good fit...
but going through relationships and gaining experience gives them a better perspective on who to date?
isnt this common amongst young peoples decision making in general?

 

[Bossino]

so you're saying young women arent able to determine which men are a good fit...
but going through relationships and gaining experience gives them a better perspective on who to date?
isnt this common amongst young peoples decision making in general?

No many men figure out soon that what women are good but there's a delay in those women returning the same feeling especially today with women bushing men off rip who don't have finances on a certain level. I've known since 12 what I was looking for in a woman. But it's rare in contemporary society. Woman don't want to be traditional wives, but still feel entitled to traditional men as well as marriage

 

[Black Steph Curry]

so you're saying young women arent able to determine which men are a good fit...
but going through relationships and gaining experience gives them a better perspective on who to date?
isnt this common amongst young peoples decision making in general?

Of course everybody's gon make mistakes along the way. But you and me both know all mistakes ain't created equally. It's like driving. Hitting the front bumper of the car behind you while trying to parallel park? Understandable. It's all in the game. Consistently failing to yield when making right turns until you get rear ended? I don't feel safe getting in a car with you behind the wheel, I'd rather walk.

Too many irresponsible women these days feel emboldened to act irresponsibly without fear of judgement or consequence, and feel it's a man's obligation to "save" them from their own bad decision making and character flaws.

Stories like Russell Wilson marrying Ciara only serve to strengthen that toxic mindset, but when they don't find their own personal Russell Wilson (most don't) they get bitter and spread their dysfunctional pathology to the next generation.

 

[8.TRES]

No I think it is you who does not understand what patriarchy is, here is the actual dictionary definition:



- Dictionary.com

As our families and homes are headed by women, it’s pretty clear going by the actual definition of patriarchy black Americans don’t live in one!

This nonsense about living in general American society and under American patriarchy is merely a smokescreen you’ve thrown up to distract and disorient.

Your argument is laughable. You are clearly the disingenuous one. And now your whole argument falls apart because you didn’t bother to read a dictionary.

the first four words of that definition - which is a shytty, halfassed definition that any sociologist would deadass laugh at and I'm sure you're aware of it based on the fact that you provided a much more in depth and accurate definition of a patriarchy yourself in this thread already -

One at a time:

1. A patriarchy is social system where the primary social, economic, legal and household decisions are made by men.

are a system of society (not a segment of society or racial group in society like you're trying so hard to make it seem), and then you want to go on talking about how it has nothing to do with American society.. are you reading the bullshyt you're typing?

you don't separate society by ethnicity or race, that's the whole point of a society... that's why you've never heard no bullshyt like "asian-american society" or "white american society" or "black American society" outside of specific organizations dedicated solely to these demographics, it's just American society as a whole

when you begin to speak on things like patriarchy and matriarchy, you're speaking on American society... you are not speaking on black American culture, in which woman-led households are more prominent, because a matriarchy speaks towards the same society that you keep trying to say is irrelevant to your topic

the very concept of a "black matriarchy" was developed by a "sociologist" of the same line of frederick hoffman, the father of modern day crime statistics; you know why these points are pushed so heavily by white purists? because if you read all of these pieces, the moynihan report and race traits alike, like i have, and not just some bullshyt dictionary.com entry, you recognize that these are all calculated efforts to criminalize the black woman and man after destabilizing their nuclear structure

you dont even realize how indoctrined you are, trying to put blame on some nonexistent "matriarchy"

go educate yourself before you try to go back and forth with me, tryna talk about some dictionary.com

 

[I Really Mean It]

It’s over.

 

[Sandy_Cheeks]

Before I get to the other misconceptions in this thread, I gotta start with this. You're one the better posters too, but you're talking about an effect/symptom of the problem not the root cause. A good father teaches a boy standards, how to maneuver, and get things done consistently. In essence how to plan, manage and be responsible. Those three aspects comprise leadership. If these good men are not seen as desirable they won't get the opportunity to pass this knowledge on to their own children. Moreover if the number of women who find them desirable is too low in their community, they'll either quit or move to a different community. I say that to say something @Dallas' 4 Eva @Youseenmywork and others on this forum if they're honest can attest to.

In the U.S. the average black woman, due to media (music, movies, TV), upbringing, and environment is more attracted to black men with an edge/dangerous element. IT DOESN'T matter how legitimate this is aka wanna-be-thug/fake gangsta, nor the tier of edge weedman, scammer, moving work, gang member. With looks being equal if these type of men are put against "square" men who work regular 9-5s the majority of black women 18-25 are choosing the former. There's a ton of reasons for this but the short term thinking is in the forefront edge dudes tend to have flash to themselves, tend to spend, show more aggression/masculinity even when unnecessary, they don't necessarily feel pressed to save/plan for the future and are usually have more "mouthpiece" as they have more downtime to shoot game at women. Conversely 9-5 dudes generally have less energy/mouthpiece due to lack of free time, don't want to waste their money, because they know making it is most of their day. These guys are usually more reserved and less overt.

In the long term 9-5 dudes not only survive but if they don't fukk up there money and if they get promotions/gain experience end up ok, but in the short term black women 18-25 see that as boring and the antithesis to the protecting/providing/edgy baller. It's only after they hit a wall and often end up with a child that they seek these regular stable "square" 9-5 men. In growing amounts these "square" men are holding grudges against they type of women who dubbed them when they younger and now want them after almost a decade of them working hard and being more or less alone. Chiefly due to the fact they see the legal financial stability and safety they can provide. So if this is the leadership you're speaking on that again falls on spousal selection. I know a ton of solid brehs who black women just aren't checking for, yet.

Makes perfect sense. And as a woman there is only so much I’m aware of from a mans perspective when it comes to the challenges of leading. When it comes to the challenges of our culture around spousal selection. Many women grow up desiring a man who is ambitious and not on no “bad boy” shyt. However, i think a lot of it is upbringing, varying values in social classes along with age and what you mentioned above. Women from the hood may not be exposed to a man who went to law school and desires to build a strong family unit and leave a legacy for his kids. They are more likely to choose who they are exposed to. It’s a vicious cycle. But I agree, what I mentioned was merely the effect of a deeper more complex issue at hand.

 

[Savvir]

Of course everybody's gon make mistakes along the way. But you and me both know all mistakes ain't created equally. It's like driving. Hitting the front bumper of the car behind you while trying to parallel park? Understandable. It's all in the game. Consistently failing to yield when making right turns until you get rear ended? I don't feel safe getting in a car with you behind the wheel, I'd rather walk.

Too many irresponsible women these days feel emboldened to act irresponsibly without fear of judgement or consequence, and feel it's a man's obligation to "save" them from their own bad decision making and character flaws.

Stories like Russell Wilson marrying Ciara only serve to strengthen that toxic mindset, but when they don't find their own personal Russell Wilson (most don't) they get bitter and spread their dysfunctional pathology to the next generation.

What "consequences" do you want to see women get for making bad dating choices when they are young?

 

[tuckgod]

Absolutely

 

[Infamous45]

Ciara wasn’t fukking with no Russel Wilson if she was in her 20’s stop lying

 

[IsThatBrothaMouzone?]

Over 60% of black households in America are headed by women. It’s been well known that boys from fatherless homes are more likely to resort to crime and have LOTS of other issues, allow me to break down the depth of the problem:

• 70% of youths in state-operated institutions come from fatherless homes – 9 times the average. (U.S. Dept. of Justice, Sept. 1988)
  
  
• 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes (U.S. Dept. Of Health/Census) – 5 times the average.
  
  
• 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes – 32 times the average.
  
  
• 85% of all children who show behavior disorders come from fatherless homes – 20 times the average. (Center for Disease Control)
  
  
• 80% of rapists with anger problems come from fatherless homes –14 times the average. (Justice & Behavior, Vol. 14, p. 403-26)
  
  
• 71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes – 9 times the average. (National Principals Association Report)
  
  
• Father Factor in Education – Fatherless children are twice as likely to drop out of school

The way I see it, given the dismal state of black fathers, the black community doesn’t have enough patriarchy.

We are literally being run by women and it’s not working.

GMB I hope your listening ouchea

We should stop impregnating women that aren't marriage material.

Black men are actually more involved with their children than men of other races but the economics of not being in the same home can be an issue.

Again though, as brehs, we can't demand patriarchy if we don't act like patriarchs. No more raw-doggin every other woman we fukk. Focus on finding a wife and getting married first....plenty of sistas out there.

We gotta lead from the front.

 

[IsThatBrothaMouzone?]

Take away both parties celebrity credentials and we know men like that aren’t pulling women like Ciara, let’s keep it real breh



some of the mentally healthiest kids I grew up with came from single parent households and some of the most damaged came from two parent households, a lot of kids I grew up with lived with their fathers but the fathers were the hot tempered emotionally unstable types. That was my situation. That’s what birds like breh, it is what it is

Good point.

A GOOD father + GOOD mom = best situation.

If either parent has issues, then you'll get lots of arguing, stress etc., that's not good for kids. One good parent >>> 2 below average parents

 

[nassaunew]

When she was well north of 30years old and a single mother

Ciara started dating Russell when she was 29 years old. She's only 34 years old now, and they have been married for several years.