Cold approaching women: the right mindset and some advice
- Thread starter 1-8-7-Skillz
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LiveFromLondon
Superstar
Kinda pump faked heavy this past week, i got a lot of looks and openings but never seem to follow through, largely because of approach anxiety due to other shyt. My last 5 approaches ive been rejected so i kinda fell back lately like i lost 92 bricks
Cold approach works sometimes but I somehow meet low interest women and they will feign niceness to get out of a situation.
Cold approaching did result in me having a relationship with one girl I met. Also going out with friends, having a good time, noticing body language on girls and talking to them has yielded better results. "Day Game" for me has been mixed.
Cold approaching did result in me having a relationship with one girl I met. Also going out with friends, having a good time, noticing body language on girls and talking to them has yielded better results. "Day Game" for me has been mixed.
For me I took basic steps..you have to work your way up.
I would play guitar in the park
-From there as time went on I noticed women would sit near me in the grass or on the bench.
- I started to realize they were possibly interested in me..or atleast comfortable enough to sit near me.
-I would just say hello, and if they went responded I would go in.
-I would start with asking them questions
"Hey I'm from Jersey, what are some cool spots here?
"Hey I heard about 'so and so' how is it?"
You're keeping the conversation natural and not focused on bagging her and coming off non chalant.
I got my game up like that.
I would play guitar in the park
-From there as time went on I noticed women would sit near me in the grass or on the bench.
- I started to realize they were possibly interested in me..or atleast comfortable enough to sit near me.
-I would just say hello, and if they went responded I would go in.
-I would start with asking them questions
"Hey I'm from Jersey, what are some cool spots here?
"Hey I heard about 'so and so' how is it?"
You're keeping the conversation natural and not focused on bagging her and coming off non chalant.
I got my game up like that.
Also cold approaching is much easier when you're secure in yourself.
By that I mean...I felt completely good about myself because I was working,getting better at guitar,doing jiu jitsu, had an apartment, and was meeting people and finding new spots to take potential dates.
So I would see a chick and I could easily envision me and her going to a spot,getting drinks,coming to my place, and I genuinely believed I was better than most of the guys she'll come across
Basically I was at a point where I wasn't nervous..and my aura started to become something that would make women nervous, or interested.
By that I mean...I felt completely good about myself because I was working,getting better at guitar,doing jiu jitsu, had an apartment, and was meeting people and finding new spots to take potential dates.
So I would see a chick and I could easily envision me and her going to a spot,getting drinks,coming to my place, and I genuinely believed I was better than most of the guys she'll come across
Basically I was at a point where I wasn't nervous..and my aura started to become something that would make women nervous, or interested.
Dreamzeedream
Banned
Keep going. Your 50% there.bro. you did the scary part(approach/rejection). I guarantee if u keep going.something will fall. The only thing. Don't take the rejection personal because they don't know youKinda pump faked heavy this past week, i got a lot of looks and openings but never seem to follow through, largely because of approach anxiety due to other shyt. My last 5 approaches ive been rejected so i kinda fell back lately like i lost 92 bricks
![jFKCMQ[img]](https://goo.gl/images/jFKCMQ[img])
Dreamzeedream
Banned
Also cold approaching is much easier when you're secure in yourself.
By that I mean...I felt completely good about myself because I was working,getting better at guitar,doing jiu jitsu, had an apartment, and was meeting people and finding new spots to take potential dates.
So I would see a chick and I could easily envision me and her going to a spot,getting drinks,coming to my place, and I genuinely believed I was better than most of the guys she'll come across
Basically I was at a point where I wasn't nervous..and my aura started to become something that would make women nervous, or interested.
Self improvement is key
LiveFromLondon
Superstar
Yeah ive just gotta be more consistent, I tend to have periods of approaching and periods where i dont for months on end. Needa find that constant groove of being able to shoot on site on a regular
Dreamzeedream
Banned
Once you find your groove all that will stop. Don't give up tho
I'm way out of the game, married with a baby, but I feel like many of the skills needed for the cold approach apply to general life
I get the feeling working on making conversation with pretty much anybody can carry over. General conversational skills should help a lot
Being able to read situations would help too... women have their guard up more or less depending where they are; makes no sense to make it more difficult for yourself
I get the feeling working on making conversation with pretty much anybody can carry over. General conversational skills should help a lot
Being able to read situations would help too... women have their guard up more or less depending where they are; makes no sense to make it more difficult for yourself
What amp did you bring to the park?
To be honest for months I was self conscious of my skills so I used a Vox headphone amp...or play my acoustic.
But then I got a Roland Micro Cube..after about a year and I was confident in my playing.
I can't do vox headphones amp. Idk if my pick up are that shyt or maybe a pair of higher quality headphones are more suitable. shyt gave me tinnitus for a few minutes. I was like fukk this. I got my eyes on a 10 watt blackstar amp. What you think?
Is it portable?
I had a small blackstar for about a month that was pretty loud...but if you're wanting to use it with a drummer it won't do the job.
Is this for home use?