O.T.I.S.
Veteran
this
And I do.
If they show a willingness and want to grow then yeah, I’ll help. Don’t mind from those who ask
It is no ones responsibility though except for their parents or guardians
Do men have a responsibility to help mentor younger males who don’t have a male role model at home?
- Thread starter Ozymandeas
- Start date
And I do.
If they show a willingness and want to grow then yeah, I’ll help. Don’t mind from those who ask
It is no ones responsibility though except for their parents or guardians
MajesticLion
Veteran
That portion about men and early childhood education is something that keeps making the rounds, and rightly so. I also keep coming across the assertion that the first male role model being a prison guard. Truth is, while by far the first positive male role model for many is a PE teacher or high school coach...everyone can't be athletic, and there are vastly fewer athletically-inclined kids than those that are not. Just as there are many more children that won't be good at music, nor art. And that's okay.
Who's to guide those kids that don't manage to find their way into those (relative) niches is an ongoing question, because while male voices are desperately needed across the board, simply being a man in this place will be made into a fight if you let it.
Who's to guide those kids that don't manage to find their way into those (relative) niches is an ongoing question, because while male voices are desperately needed across the board, simply being a man in this place will be made into a fight if you let it.
Taadow
The StarchBishop™️
…so I got not even 10 minutes in before the discussion became how we need to do that so women can
have better men to marry.
Based on that, fukk no.
Let them eat cake.
Elle Seven
Superstar
When he was alive, to give his callers his perspective, Kevin Samuels would often use the example of what happens in nature .
He would ask the ladies what happens to cubs in a pride of lions which has been usurped by a new lion.
The answer was always they would be killed by the new lion (or, at best, abandoned) in order to make the lionesses want to mate again and have his young; the understanding was that males period do not want to put resources into offspring which are not their own.
I understand this concept.
This is where it always gives me pause though.
Of the Most High's creations, we as human beings are the ones given the gifts of imagination and foresight...so we can create (whether to be constructive or destructive) and we can use logic to predict (and, again, use that to be constructive or destructive).
Therefore, on the one hand, while one could make the argument that, just like in nature, parentless offspring often have death in their future - whether at the hands of a predator who is specifically seeking them or from neglect due to their abandonment by another parent - we could also say we understand what happens in societies where human boys are not given adequate care, guidance and resources toward their development into strong and ethical young men...we literally already know that this almost never turns out well.
When the argument is made to not put resources into trying to prevent the development of angry men while those future men are still boys, I wonder if some feel it is more preferable to deal with some of these same young men once they become derelict adults. That way, they are still a resource - they are a resource for the prison industrial complex versus being a resource for the community to which they belong.
Either way, they and their efforts will benefit someone (a community of families or a group of wealthy investors), and a group of people somewhere in the equation is going to pay a price for their actions (their communities will either be blessed by the positive fruits they seed and harvest in their communities or be terrorized by the destructive ones they propagate).
There is no way around this, either way.
I'm saying this as a mother, though, and understand, at least from a lot of the sentiments here, that men do not necessarily see it the same way.
He would ask the ladies what happens to cubs in a pride of lions which has been usurped by a new lion.
The answer was always they would be killed by the new lion (or, at best, abandoned) in order to make the lionesses want to mate again and have his young; the understanding was that males period do not want to put resources into offspring which are not their own.
I understand this concept.
This is where it always gives me pause though.
Of the Most High's creations, we as human beings are the ones given the gifts of imagination and foresight...so we can create (whether to be constructive or destructive) and we can use logic to predict (and, again, use that to be constructive or destructive).
Therefore, on the one hand, while one could make the argument that, just like in nature, parentless offspring often have death in their future - whether at the hands of a predator who is specifically seeking them or from neglect due to their abandonment by another parent - we could also say we understand what happens in societies where human boys are not given adequate care, guidance and resources toward their development into strong and ethical young men...we literally already know that this almost never turns out well.
When the argument is made to not put resources into trying to prevent the development of angry men while those future men are still boys, I wonder if some feel it is more preferable to deal with some of these same young men once they become derelict adults. That way, they are still a resource - they are a resource for the prison industrial complex versus being a resource for the community to which they belong.
Either way, they and their efforts will benefit someone (a community of families or a group of wealthy investors), and a group of people somewhere in the equation is going to pay a price for their actions (their communities will either be blessed by the positive fruits they seed and harvest in their communities or be terrorized by the destructive ones they propagate).
There is no way around this, either way.
I'm saying this as a mother, though, and understand, at least from a lot of the sentiments here, that men do not necessarily see it the same way.
Taadow
The StarchBishop™️
Absolutely.
But I did appreciate this: them admitting that even those who do offer help is to those who are (or could potentially be) “Top 10%”.
Now what is to be done about the other 90%? That is what hardly ever gets discussed…and the key imo lies within something you said here.
The best thing you can do for anybody - child, adult of any race, etc. - is to help them discover what their niche is. If they can do that, they
will find their own people/paths to follow.
The thing I don't like about this question is that it becomes a stick to beat men with.
If a young man is fukking up, the fingers shouldn't be pointed at men who aren't his family.
I think that as a society, it is important to help others but I get sick and tired of it becoming a thankless job for the kind hearted and an expected safety net for the careless.
If a young man is fukking up, the fingers shouldn't be pointed at men who aren't his family.
I think that as a society, it is important to help others but I get sick and tired of it becoming a thankless job for the kind hearted and an expected safety net for the careless.
O³ (O cubed)
No more PAWGs, PLEASE??!!!??
The only two boys I mentor are my nephews. Ranging from 29 down to 4 months.
One is working an internship at Shell, one is in the army, another is about to go into university. The others are eating glue and teething
One is working an internship at Shell, one is in the army, another is about to go into university. The others are eating glue and teething
Response-ability = the ability to respond.
Not obligation I mind you, but the ability to respond to the needs of young men in your community...absolutely, there is plenty more that could be done.
Not obligation I mind you, but the ability to respond to the needs of young men in your community...absolutely, there is plenty more that could be done.
Responsibility?!?!? No but I do feel compelled to help when I can.
Too many kids out here on dummy mission and nothing I can say in the moment will steer them in the right direction because that level of influence takes time and commitment
Yesterday, some kids threw a basketball at someone in traffic riding a bike. Thank God they missed and when I put my head up and pointed to the little nikka, he acts like nothing happened. I smh and kept it moving because I know in the moment, around your friends, me reprimanding him will do nothing but excite him.
This is a matter of home training. The only responsibility I have is to make sure me and mine don’t do it and they won’t because I don’t condone or promote behavior like that
Too many kids out here on dummy mission and nothing I can say in the moment will steer them in the right direction because that level of influence takes time and commitment
Yesterday, some kids threw a basketball at someone in traffic riding a bike. Thank God they missed and when I put my head up and pointed to the little nikka, he acts like nothing happened. I smh and kept it moving because I know in the moment, around your friends, me reprimanding him will do nothing but excite him.
This is a matter of home training. The only responsibility I have is to make sure me and mine don’t do it and they won’t because I don’t condone or promote behavior like that
AceDeuceTrey
Pro
Some weak minded folks gonna take offense to this but people taking more personal accountability like this regardless of their circumstances will do way more good for that person’s personal development than expecting or needing someone else, especially a stranger, to “teach” them anything.
This applies to other facets of life too (career, money, health, etc.)
Chrishaune
Veteran
Depends on whether the mother has too much control or not. If she sees the need for a man in the boys life then I guess give it a try.
You'll be trying to overcome a lot of indoctrination otherwise.
You'll be trying to overcome a lot of indoctrination otherwise.