Ever felt like commiting suicide?

[Smokin Rider]

Yeah, I've been there. I'm 27 been depressed off and on since 16. I decided I wanted to live after I got my hands on a 9milli, slapped the clip in, turned off the safety and held it to my dome with my finger on the trigger. But...I just couldn't put my family that I have left thru it and decided if I ain't dying then I better start living. That was 4 years ago. Life is better now, I stay on my grind and I still hold a lot of pain in but I manage it much better. I stay motivated by thinkin about doin big things to show the ones who doubted me or left me, that they couldn't hold me down from achievin greatness.

 

[MidwestFinest]

Yeah for the last year or so. I actually tried overdosing on pills but it didn't work so I'm just trying to make the best of things. Been depressed for the last 3 years and really struggling to motivate myself so I can do better in school and somehow set up a decent plan for myself when I graduate 2 years. It's fukking hard but I'm more hopeful than I was a year ago. Still sad but I'm sure things will get better soon.

 

[Scott Larock]

I'm seriously considering it or just moving to sleep in my car, I'm very depressed and don't wanna get pushed over the edge. A lot of shyt I fukked up in my life and I'm feeling it right now.

 

[HollowPoints2]

Life is kicking my ass, sometimes it seems too hard. I probably got it harder than anybody on here. I've though about itbefore but I could never do it. The bible I read says you can't get to heaven by doing it.

At quiet times I once contemplated suicide and would tried but when I held that 9 all I could see is my mother's eyes - 2pac

You just have to listen to more Tupac preferably his last two albums Makaveli or all eyes on me. If you do this consistently while driving in your car for 6 months, you will be healed from any problems because Tupac explains the game of life.

 

[DrX]

Ppl gotta let go of expectations.... Expectations will make u feel like a loser...stop comparing yourself to other ppl...find something deeper to live for than superficial things

 

[Jack Trippa 3z company ho]

I've certainly been so down that the thought would cross my mind. Really low times.

But I would never do that to my Mother, she would be destroyed by the sadness. And I do believe in God, and suicide is the unforgiven sin.

We gotta stay strong and keep getting back up. We gotta do our time on earth, and only God should decide when we can check out.

 

[Lo-Co]

Pops attempted and succeeded. Grandfather died few years after him and my brother had to go off to college. Add multiple failed relationships and you have disaster. I was managing at first but I just collapsed. I had this melancholy aura that people couldn't understand or give a fukk about. So I attempted a few times. I remember sitting in the hospital feeling like a dikkhead. That summer was some eye opening shyt. It was like a recreation one flew over the cuckoos nest. I made a few friends. Surprisingly.
But its like I feel like a burden with my emotions. So I'll sit and submerge myself in my thoughts and dissect them myself. Suicide is something I think about but I have no intentions of doing it. Its like playing deal or no deal to me in a sense.

 

[iBrowse]

@1984 no but maybe you can talk to OP.

 

[Lo-Co]

I'm not talking to anybody face to face cause I won't ever do it

If you ever need somewhere to vent, pm me.

 

[Knuckles Red]

Honestly, Yes. I've suffered from depression for over a decade now. My suicidal thoughts are a result of depression + isolation + my personal issues + my family issues + growing up black in an all white environment. Last year, near the end, it got really bad. I won't go into detail, but these people here saying that, "you're in control of your own happiness/destiny," thats easier said than done. I've said this before, but there are some days where I've missed class because I just can't bring myself to get out of bed and face society. Its just the same shyt everyday. I often times find myself asking, "whats the point of any of this?"

 

[NoMorePie]

Yes, unfortunately.

 

[Lo-Co]

Honestly, Yes. I've suffered from depression for over a decade now. My suicidal thoughts are a result of depression + isolation + my personal issues + my family issues + growing up black in an all white environment. Last year, near the end, it got really bad. I won't go into detail, but these people here saying that, "you're in control of your own happiness/destiny," thats easier said than done. I've said this before, but there are some days where I've missed class because I just can't bring myself to get out of bed and face society. Its just the same shyt everyday. I often times find myself asking, "whats the point of any of this?"

I remember I used to cut school or leave in the middle of the day because of my depression. I feel like I'm more of a loner these days from a combination of people disappointing me and just enjoying alone time

 

[Scott Larock]

I'm a slim looking older black male with a speech issue and and sickle cell thallesmia, honestly I have issues fitting into circles. Alot of black folks don't fukk with me like thst I don't look like them.

I'm thst square broke black man, different spot for anyone to be in. I'm getting to the point where I need to reinvent myself.

 

[skeetsinternal]

 

[Alan Emerald]

what is really the point of suicide, if you are already going to die ?

whether you believe in God or do not. Death will happen regardless.

So Consider this..
The real choice is not about whether you should die by your own hand. .. it's REALLY about how you should live.

Suicide might really be the point when you were going to die anyway but you are given a choice to choose life.


You didn't have a choice to be brought to life ..yet you were.. this alone proves there are "forces" at work that have control over events in your life

Bad things were going to happen in your life .. you couldn't have prevented it .


the truth is you cannot escape pain as it is apart of life. Your mother felt pain to give birth to you. .. but it passed.

Pain is not the only thing you will feel in life no matter how deep the hurt. You can find joy.. you will still smile and in that is the strength to unburden your soul


Choosing to die because of pain does not provide escape from it but the exact opposite.

You died.. with it.
.. by your side and clutched it eternally.


Your soul never learns how to be free because you didn't live long enough to learn how and that pain was the only thing that mattered to you in the end.



If you choose life and fight through the pain then you'll come across reasons to smile and live... and this will be what you hold on to when you eventually die.

as such..you will have found freedom in both Life and Death



....For those who have ears..

Altho i don't agree with everything written I've found much truth in this post. Through life ive experienced much pain and tried my best to handle it without influence of narcotics or alcohol. Not alwayd successful at that part but thru all the low times that God has allowed me to endure i found peace in it. No matter how far i fell. So often the thing i feared most fell upon me but still I made it through. Not only made it thru the fire but came out stronger than before. Many times that strength was needed to get thru the next ordeal. Many times the things we go thru is not necessarily just for us but instead to be able to relate to another human being that may not have that strength and pull them thru. Life often isn't easy, then again nothing I've found to be worth while is, but life is full of possibilities. It is hell to suffer but sometimes we find joy even in the suffering and meaning that can change our lives as well as ppl we may come across. We have to endure.