Everybody Winning On The Coli, But Come Post Some L’s

[WaveMolecules]

Damn this shyt happened to me but I did the refusal so I got it down to dwai but the dmv railroaded me with 38 weeks of alcohol therapy session I had to complete for my license shyt was one of the worst periods of my life especially sitting in a class with a bunch of repeated DUI offenders..

I took the charge because they wanted to throw weapons possession at me because of a home depot blade I had in the glove box

Honestly just wanted to get it over with asap.

Did 4 months of what amounted to Alcoholics anonymous 2 times a week and I was piss testedat least once a week for everything including alcohol.

This has been a shytty year to say the least

I just this week got my license back after a year.

 

[Mfalme_Perez]

I was in Union square and I was walking into the Subway on my way to my friends crib. As I was walking, I bumped into a guy whom I had a big crush on for months. We're chopping it up with each other and having a good time all while still standing outside of the entrance to the train.

An hour or so goes by and I told him that I had to get going, ( My Homegirl was blowing my phone up.) and we start walking towards the Turnstiles. Little did I know, the fukking floor was wet. Before I could even swipe my MetroCard, BAM! I fall flat on my ass and got wet. My crush helps me up and falls on his ass too. The worst part is we tripped in someone's piss. He walks me to the train and that's when we realize that we smelled like full on piss. As I'm getting on the train and still flirting with him, not paying attention I walked right into the holding bar on the fukking train! You will never see a Black woman turn red in the face like I did. I turned around to look out the window and saw my crush laughing his ass off. I never saw or spoke to him again.

 

[Columbo]

Nikkas in here tellin crazy ducktales

 

[International Playa]

Lost a thick ass girl because I couldnt get my dikk up. Porn had affected my erections brehs, ever since then I been on #NoFap

She was built like this

 

[staticshock]

Got a DM late nite from a latina bytch i met before...was very flirty but sumthn seemed off...so before i left i wrote the girls name n the apartments im going too (in case sumthn happens) on paper n left it on my bed...

I get to the apts 3 gates...but only 1 way in n one way out....


As soon as i pull in i see a dude in hoodie duck down...i knew it was a set up(her ex bf had her PW)

I did some fast n furious shyt n pointed my car to drive out n a car (with its lights turned off) drives up to the exit...

So i have a 3 second window of do i run this dude over n tbone this fukkn car(and most likely do 10 years in prison) or figure sumthn out...so i drove thru the apts heary beating....than i thought im stuck in here...so i park my car and lean up against a wall like i live there...5 mins goes by...these dudes arent chasing me...i got a text sayn "ay nikka its only 1 way out of here blah blah"....so this couple walkn into there place walks by i tell them whats going on but they seem suspicous of me...so they asked me to wait outside...

I felt like tony montana when he went to the motel...so i call 911 n say that theres a body layn on the ground in front of the apts entrance...5 mins later sirens coming...i see the dudes running thru the apts...and i get in my car n drive away...

Dude texts me sayn why i call cops...he just wanted to fight (with a car full of dudes)

Yo heart probably jumped thru your chest when you got that message

 

[Poetical Poltergeist]

Took a big L one time, I ran into this chick I used to work with and she was being flirty when she never gave a fukk before or maybe I didn't notice but we exchange numbers. So one Friday night I'm in stay home and chill mode but she kept texting me saying she wanted me to meet her at a bar and that she really wanted to see me. I really didn't wanna do shyt but she was still kinda cute and anything for p*ssy right?

So I get all fresh and go down there and she their with one of her friends (ugly)they just hanging out getting buzzed. I literally order a beer and she all being close to me and gazing in my eyes. Then someone catches her atttention and she totally switches up and keeps her distance I turn and look and recognize the cat but couldn't place him immediately. Her friend blurts out there so and so, and this chick I go out to hang wit, thinking ima get me some leaves and is all on dudes jock guess they were a thing some years ago. Now i'm left there with her ugly friend like a chump. Lol...so I finish my beer and bounce. The next day she all texting me like why did u leave and his and that. I was like whatever, do u don't try and waste my time tho and didn't engage further wasn't gonna waste no more energy on this chick.

I kind of got her back tho, maybe 6 months later I'm at a spot and she shows up, and tries her flirting shyt again, I told her to wait for me by the bar while hit up the restroom, me and my homie bounced to another spot left her hanging. She sent me a fukked up text, I was like sorry, I forgot about u.

 

[StarClout]

Read this entire thread

There's a lot of older lonely women out there

 

[The Infamous]

There was a dude in high school a bunch of people called grizzly bear. He was massive and hairy, which is how he got the nickname.

One day, I was with a few chicks in the main hallway of our school. This dude came by to kick it and I was like 'Yo grizzly bear'.

All of sudden, at the corner of my eye, I see a massive hand flying toward my face. In that split second, I knew I fukked up bad. Dude slapped the soul out of me. I fell to the ground immediately cause of the impact.
Everybody was staring at me like I didn't know how to react. I knew that if I hit him back, I would get my shyt pushed in. I was a scrawny high school kid and he was built like an offensive lineman.

I just acted like nothing happened and kept it moving. Washed my face up afterwards and saw that he messed up my shyt pretty bad.

 

[EffedUp]

I've had plenty of Ls but this one still gets me:

Back in 2012 at my old job, one of my co-workers was a nice thick MILF (she's 47 at the time, me 27). She has 4 daughters but would always scare me away from talking to them. It had me thinking that moms wanted me all to herself. Anyways, she was mad cool and we would flirt at times.

One day, I decide to go for it since I wanted to smash and felt she wanted to as well. Job had been stressing me out all year so I needed to release some tension. I hit her up on a Saturday wanting to take her out for lunch the next day. I tell her to call back when she come up with a place. She never does so I try calling her to no answer. The phone is steady ringing which tells me something is funny. She never answers my calls so I'm like "fukk it". I wake up Sunday to a text from her apologizing and that she forgot she had to take her grandkids out to eat. I knew it was bullshyt.

Get back to work and I overhear her and another co-worker (they were also neighbors) talking about her ex. Her ex showed up to her crib that Saturday night. What you do with your life is your business but don't be lying on other people (the kids in this case) and making up stories. She tells me that he just showed up cause he lost his job but it ain't like that no more. She's even suggesting we kick it after that. The week before we are to chill she tells me he keeps showing up and doesn't want us to bump heads. Plus, she's worried about our co-worker starting rumors cause she dated a younger man in the past and people kept calling her a cougar and shyt. I'm like "if y'all ain't together no more, what's the problem?".
As time goes on, she comes up with more bullshyt and ultimately does get back with her ex. She used to vent about this nikka all the time and how nobody in her family liked him anyway. Now she's giving him another chance. I try ignoring her but because of work obviously I can't avoid her. Ultimately I tell her I regret trying to mess with her and she laughs at me. I feel she only laughed cause she felt I was taking it too seriously but at the time I wanted to punch her in the face. That day was also when I finally hit the breaking point at my job (poor leadership and extra hours will do it to you) and decided to put in my 2 weeks.

I went from only wanting to smash the broad to downright catching feelings. An older woman at that. I've only talked to her like once since I left when she hit me up out of the blue and left a voicemail. I was thinking it was an emergency or something but it was just her trying to get me to come back to that job. Even gave her boss my number to call me and shyt.

 

[greatone]

My job normally has different food trucks come every other friday for lunch.

I had been noticed this bad ass chick who i think works on the 4th floor. Lil bish is a strong 8 with a nice lil bubble in the back. I work on the 3rd floor so I dont even see her alot.


Well last friday I am in the parking lot trying to decide which truck i want to get grub from. I decide on the one serving chicken n waffles.


Who gets in line behind me? Super 8

She chats me up. Asking what im ordering. We get to chit chatting while waiting for our grub. Super 8 is mad chill and i just so happened to have a fresh taper and line up after 7 weeks of wolfin. Waves are on god mode.


We walk into the building together and she says lets take the stairs. We are going to need to burn some calories before eating all this grub.


We are slow walking up the steps side by side still conversating. We hit the 2nd floor and i am sneaking another peek at Super 8's rump when i misjudged the step...


nikkas i fell going UP the steps... When my foot skipped off the step I went OohhhhhHHHHHHoooOooooo!!!! But for some reason it came out mad feminine.

I had my food in one hand and Im teeter tottering and my equilibrium was off like a mother fukker.. I flung my free hand out to grab something to help me out because all I could see in my mind is those concrete steps rushing up to smack me in the grill.


I grab the closest thing nearest to me to stabilize myself. Super 8

I grasped her sleeve and that shyt tore off like some nba tearaway pants.


Now my whole balance is beyond repair.. I hit the damn steps hard as fukk and slid down them motherfukkers. I watched my chicken n waffles tumble once...twice. then bust open all over the landing



Then i noticed it was raining chicken n waffles...but it was not mine


It was Super 8's. When i tried to grab for her and tore her sleeve she lost balance too but she almost corrected the L... But then lost balance too and her food went up in the air and rained down on me a split second before she busted her ass down the steps too.



It was carnage brehs. Chicken. waffles. syrup. she looked at me like

I was waiting for the L and you didn't disappoint. When you start talking about the steps I was trying to predict how you fell. It was better than I could predict.

 

[Pineal Gland]

I thought somebody quoted a post from the @General Mills Chronicles, I didn't realize it was a brand new L for my nikka

 

[Neo. The Only. The One.]

My job normally has different food trucks come every other friday for lunch.

I had been noticed this bad ass chick who i think works on the 4th floor. Lil bish is a strong 8 with a nice lil bubble in the back. I work on the 3rd floor so I dont even see her alot.


Well last friday I am in the parking lot trying to decide which truck i want to get grub from. I decide on the one serving chicken n waffles.


Who gets in line behind me? Super 8

She chats me up. Asking what im ordering. We get to chit chatting while waiting for our grub. Super 8 is mad chill and i just so happened to have a fresh taper and line up after 7 weeks of wolfin. Waves are on god mode.


We walk into the building together and she says lets take the stairs. We are going to need to burn some calories before eating all this grub.


We are slow walking up the steps side by side still conversating. We hit the 2nd floor and i am sneaking another peek at Super 8's rump when i misjudged the step...


nikkas i fell going UP the steps... When my foot skipped off the step I went OohhhhhHHHHHHoooOooooo!!!! But for some reason it came out mad feminine.

I had my food in one hand and Im teeter tottering and my equilibrium was off like a mother fukker.. I flung my free hand out to grab something to help me out because all I could see in my mind is those concrete steps rushing up to smack me in the grill.


I grab the closest thing nearest to me to stabilize myself. Super 8

I grasped her sleeve and that shyt tore off like some nba tearaway pants.


Now my whole balance is beyond repair.. I hit the damn steps hard as fukk and slid down them motherfukkers. I watched my chicken n waffles tumble once...twice. then bust open all over the landing



Then i noticed it was raining chicken n waffles...but it was not mine


It was Super 8's. When i tried to grab for her and tore her sleeve she lost balance too but she almost corrected the L... But then lost balance too and her food went up in the air and rained down on me a split second before she busted her ass down the steps too.



It was carnage brehs. Chicken. waffles. syrup. she looked at me like

.




oh my god

 

[Neo. The Only. The One.]

I got completely embarrassed in front of a large room of ppl Saturday but I don't want to speak on it

 

[Charlie Hustle]

Also took a charge for somebody that went on to have a good military career but the motherfukker od'd next to his wife years later so yeah not many Ls just a few hiccups

Thought ya boy had the golden ticket huh

 

[NotAnFBIagent]

I got completely embarrassed in front of a large room of ppl Saturday but I don't want to speak on it

cleanse your soul