Wife of 9 years had an Affair
hello everyone. I just wanted to share my story with anybody that was willing to listen. Its hard for me right now, and I haven't really talked to anyone about this. I'll try to keep it short, but I think it'll be hard.
About the beginning of March my wife started acting weird. I have a great gut instinct, and after she went out with the girls, she came home a little drunk. It was about midnight and frankly she doesn't go out all that much, and when she did she would never get drunk because she had to drive home. But this night was different. When I asked her where she was and what she did, because normally it was always an open book, she would always tell me play by play of where she went what She did,she just stared at me like a deer in headlights, and gave me one word answers, and right away I knew something was wrong.
so I started asking questions about where she was going everyday and asking how her day was, she was starting to get Irritated and say that I was investigating. When before anything I ever asked was answered. That was a red flag for me.it started to get to the point that she was so short with me and the kids, my son is 11 and my daughter is 6. She would come home,complain, look like she was with in withdrawal every time she was Home.
so I made a hard decision I decided to get a tracking GPS. I had a conflict about this because I trust my wife, and frankly I was figuring it was just a phase, because she never gave me any indication that we have marital problems. Yes we would argue we're both stubborn, but we always work things out. I started tracking her mainly for peace of mind and to see if she was lying to me. I knew where she was every minute of the day or at least Her car. so when I started asking how she was and what she was doing, unfortunately what she told me what she was doing and where she was, never coincided with the GPS. So now I started becoming very suspicious.
to backup my suspicion, I check phone records, started taking down notes as to when there was one to two hours missing in the day. She is a registered nurse that has got a new job at a hospice being a professional liaison, basically a marketer for hospice. A great job with great flexibility, ability to make your own hours, basically drive around all day and go to doctors offices and self service. Coupled with the fact that they give her a laptop and an extra phone, probably made it very easy and tempting to stray.
about 3 weeks after tracking her, we went on vacation to St Martin. I assume that we needed to get away just the two of us without the kids, so we could connect because frankly we haven't been without the kids for 9 years. Me and my best friend and both our wives went. I had such a great time, but it seem like I was on vacation by myself. I even approach my wife and said this, and she told me stop acting like a b**** . She would never say this to me. funny thing is we we had sex the whole time. It was like we were kids again. It was great. So after a week we come home on Sunday. Then Monday rolls around.
Monday April 29th 2013, I go to work and so does she and I tracker once again. And at around 3 o'clock in the afternoon, I notice she parks at the same place that she did a few other times BY a mall. She leaves around 6.comEs home and quickly wants to go to bed. I said lets have sex and she just rolled over and says she's tired. The next day I was bringing my son to lacrosse practice at around 6 p.m.. I text her and she said she was going to get our daughter at dance at around 6 o'clock. But while watching the GPS, she goes to this house. My stomach drops. This is it I thought. I quickly get someone to watch my son and take off, straight to the location. My mind was racing, not knowing what to expect.
I pull up to the location, and see my wifes car there park next to another. I park down the block and sneak to the front of the house. I attempt to open the door but it was locked. I look in the windows and all was quiet.my stomach drops again. I was hoping it was her friends house or something. Up to this point I still had thoughts that I was crazy, paranoid and that if my wife found out that I was tracking her that would ruin a relationship because I trusted her.so around the house and went to the back door. Slowly turned the handle and the door opened.
I walk down the hallway and I hear music coming from a closed door. I lower my shoulder, and bash the door in. It quickly closes in my face, because he must have been standing behind it, because they probably heard something. I Then kicked the door in..and it broke off the hinges, and fell on the guy. and like that my life was shattered, they were both standing by the bed naked, and I proceeded to put that man in a headlock. I started choking him violently, wHile my wife was in the background screaming David stop David stop. I looked at her and said how could you do this to me, I also said I knew it. The man starts to bite my fingers and I let go. I live in Pennsylvania and when he took off down the hallway I knew he was going to get, a gun.
I get up and I take off Out of the house.I get in my car, and the man comes out of the house naked with the rifle pointed at me. Unbelievable. I was shaking. Hysterically I take off Towards home. ..crying and shaking the whole way. She comes home later that night and we cry and say I'm sorry to one anotherand it was sad. She had so much Re Morse the first two days.then something funny happened, she started being angry and unremorseful. How could she??? What have I done?
after talking, she said that I was mentally abusing Her and really mean. I'm not perfect husband and or man, and I work in construction and yes I curse sometimes. But the accusations of me telling her that I would killer and punch her in the face was too much. I would say mean things once in awhile but never mean. She let it build up to the point where she distance yourself from me and talking to me was too much. She never approach me sincerely to let me know something was wrong. I knew something was wrong but I didn't realize this. I was always try stopping the arguments, I would always ask why she was b***** . I felt I did all the things to make everything right when we were arguing but she was unreceptive, this goes back more than two months.
it takes two but I understand we can work at it. I asked and I we went to counseling two times because I want to make this marriage work for me, for her, for my children. She comes from a broken family, her mother cheated on her father. She's living with the person that she cheated on her father with to this day. I come from a family who still married, old fashion loyal and loving. Willing to always work through things knowing that it will make you stronger and a better person, never a quitter.
Basically right now she has adopted the what's the use attitude, and she wants out. Not even giving me a chance to make things better when all the while I was. I'm so sad, I feel like I'm dying inside. I am a strong person but this is shaking me to the core. I am such a loyal man and I stuck by her side this whole time through the good times and bad thick and thin sickness and in health, and this is the thanks I get, no respect for me, no respect for herself,nothing, never took into consideration everything we had and that was around her. My beautiful children that we raiseD so well,Are going to be shattered because of this. .
she wants to break up with a mediator and do this Civily, but how can I I still want my family. 3 weeks into this now and I believe she's still seeing this man or whoever. She says she had no plans to be with him because he's married..and he was gonna leave his wife.I read all the emails, so all the pictures sent to each other Through emails, and it seems that they did have plans. I cannot believe this is going to happen. She's in a fantasy world right now, and is willing to throw away everything with a signature. ..I dont quit...seems she has..hard for me because I love her still dearly. ..we lost communication and resentment set in....she is too c louded by anger to even talk to..hard to still live at home together and her not show emotions and pretend im not there.
Im devastated. .I dont want a divorce but I can't continue to be treated this way. Any thoughts ir comments will help. Thank you for listening.
Sincerely david
Is this a microcosm of whats really going on out here or is this simply a site where people tell their stories of being victims of infidelity or not being faithful so, of course it will seem like an overwhelming amount of women are heartless and irrational?
I dont mean all I just mean the majority aka 51%
at some of these stories
pass. she had a tough moms teaching her the wrong things. at the end of the day you can run from DNA but you cant hide. it will come back to get you. hopefully you're strong enough to fight it off. and usually you're not without that Jesus help.
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