"Home" is where your heart is.
You can tell someone they are beautiful and you support them all day, but it won't mean anything until
they believe it themselves.
So it doesn't matter to you as much if they're not college educated, or nah?
And - you aren't gonna make things any better for yourself by becoming "discouraged" by what the next person does.
They have to live their own lives, and so do you.
Home is where the heart is. It does take the person believing they're beautiful for it to be transformative. I like you think love is a verb as well as a noun.
To love myself is to love people who look like me and I can relate to. That person can be another race. But my ideal partner is a black woman who's like or good for me.
I get discouraged, furious, and excited often. It's difficult to contain but it doesn't impede my development. My anxiety stems my inability to impact my community in the way I want as an individual.
I see more college educated black folks procreating with non blacks more than those without university degrees. I understand why. It didn't bother me until I became a nanny and saw how some of these kids behave and the identity issues they have.
For example I know a few Ethiopians being raised by white folks. Neither think black people are attractive. They don't like the way they look and they're beautiful children inside and out. The boy does everything I do.
I realized it's because he's looking for a role model he can identify with. I think if they were around black people often they'd have a healthier view of themselves and other black people. I think class pays a bigger role in this than I'm giving it credit for. I hate to have that conversation. I work for wealthy people and the culture of the wealthy is white peppered with color. Again, it could just be my suburban bubble.