And never consummated. That marriage is null & void. A non factor.
The difference is that Sansa made the vast majority of those mistakes as a child. This is the greatest thing about Sansa's character development. Everyone else was able to rely on magic except Sansa. Jon is still outchea acting dumb b/c he was able to be revived from the dead. Dany, who got away with every bad decision b/c she had dragons, is finally in the North where people don't GAF.
And that's nothing to sneeze at. If you call back to Ned's departure in S1, the entire staff is reverting to Lady Cat for direction on everything. The lady needs to be well suited to keep the house running if her husband leaves for a short time or in death. The lady, in GOT & real life, is basically your 2nd in command (interchangeable depending on the topic) & that's nothing to diminish.
Sansa is the only reason why the Starks have a home to return to. I wish I could find this clip, but in GOT, there's a scene where Bronn & Jamie speak about war/winter. Bron states that it's the cold & the hunger that kills people, not the swords. And what is Sansa worried about? Food, clothing & shelter. You're missing the importance of the basics & Sansa appears to be the only one paying attention to the details in this arena.