Crizzy
U wanted the smoke...u can have it your way
True indeed
People who have dealt with tough breakups...
- Thread starter murksiderock
- Start date
True indeed
Never happened to me. Know a couple people it happened to.
I've generally subscribed to the idea that until actual space is achieved, you can't really begin moving on and healing. OP appears to be an exception.
Y'all doing joint custody or ... ?
I've generally subscribed to the idea that until actual space is achieved, you can't really begin moving on and healing. OP appears to be an exception.
Y'all doing joint custody or ... ?
Crizzy
U wanted the smoke...u can have it your way
Another thing...get joint custody. Did that wit my lil dude. We get our 6 months out the year wit him as well as my BM. Claim every other year on taxes and every other year holidays spring breaks fall breaks...best thing to happen when i took her 2 court
It’s cheaper to keep her ..seriously 
Unless there’s violence or infidelity find a reason to stay. Otherwise in 3-6mo you’re gonna miss tf out of her and the kids. The moment @Another Man steps in and claims your family as his, you gonna be sick. She’s gonna also put u on child support no matter what she says now.
that’s as I got.
Unless there’s violence or infidelity find a reason to stay. Otherwise in 3-6mo you’re gonna miss tf out of her and the kids. The moment @Another Man steps in and claims your family as his, you gonna be sick. She’s gonna also put u on child support no matter what she says now.
that’s as I got.
It’s cheaper to keep her ..seriously
Unless there’s violence or infidelity find a reason to stay. Otherwise in 3-6mo you’re gonna miss tf out of her and the kids. The moment @Another Man steps in and claims your family as his, you gonna be sick. She’s gonna also put u on child support no matter what she says now.
that’s as I got.
I see what you're saying but this depends on how valuable your sanity/peace of mind is to you. Staying in a trash/toxic relationship ain't worth it.
Cel 510 kid ados forever
Veteran
u should move out fam.
these situations are always tough.
money,kids etc
these situations are always tough.
money,kids etc
Crizzy
U wanted the smoke...u can have it your way
Preach...
Another black family broken up because of nonsense. 
Like I said if it’s violence or infidelity then dip. From what he’s saying it doesn’t sound that toxic.
It’s cheaper to keep her ..seriously
Unless there’s violence or infidelity find a reason to stay. Otherwise in 3-6mo you’re gonna miss tf out of her and the kids. The moment @Another Man steps in and claims your family as his, you gonna be sick. She’s gonna also put u on child support no matter what she says now.
that’s as I got.
murksiderock
Superstar
I'm afraid of going to court, not gonna lie. But we have game planned it somewhat, that the girls live with her from a week before school starts (so mid-August) until a week after school ends (mid-June), based on North Carolina school schedules...
I would have them mid-June to mid-August. We've also agreed that during the school year, I'd be able to see them whenever, and there would be some weekends they could stay with me. We will alternate holidays, like if I get Thanksgiving and Christmas this year, she'd get Spring Break. Alternating...
What complicates this, and part of my concern with going to court and getting regular joint custody, is we are gonna be living in different cities 2 hours apart. So as they enter school in a couple years, the 6 month on/off thing isn't practical since we won't be in the same city...
Do you live in the same city as your kids mom? I figure this would be easier in that case, but in mine it doesnt seem practical...
It’s cheaper to keep her ..seriously
Unless there’s violence or infidelity find a reason to stay. Otherwise in 3-6mo you’re gonna miss tf out of her and the kids. The moment @Another Man steps in and claims your family as his, you gonna be sick. She’s gonna also put u on child support no matter what she says now.
that’s as I got.
No violence or infidelity...
And definitely not keeping her lol, already tried that...
I hope you two are able to have a smooth coparenting situation. I’ve never take my son’s father to court and I don’t have him on child support. He gives me money though each month. I have my son during the school year, he has my son during the summer, right now(winter break) and spring break. He’s lives out of state.
My son is 8 btw. I didn’t live with his dad post break up, I left him the very day I broke up with him. I moved in with fam. Anything is better than staying with someone you don’t want to be with. My son was 1 at the time. I’m not going to say it’s been smooth sailing because it hasn’t. Part of the reason it hasn’t though has been because of immaturity. The other part which isn’t going to be the case for you is that my son’s father still wants to be with me. That means I gotta be really cautious about how navigate things.
When his dad moves out here in the fall of 2020 that’s when shyt will probably get real, thankfully I do try to maintain a friendship to keep things peaceful. I’m not one of those people that likes drama and confrontation.
Crizzy
U wanted the smoke...u can have it your way
yeah we do... If y'all can make it work with how y'all are suggesting then that will be great.
murksiderock
Superstar
I think she's thinking about child support, I think she's already looked into it and definitely I know she's being given advice from friends and family to put me on it...
What she's told me though, is that she wouldn't put me on it, because she believes that assistance should only be for parents unwilling to financially contribute to their children...
Do I believe that? Nah not totally, I hope she keeps her word but I have plenty of doubt on that...
I definitely agree with everyone saying it's better to have peace of mind over staying with someone. I missed that window multiple times over that we were actually together, but right now it's like I can see the finish line in the distance, let's make the smartest move for the near future (impending official physical split in 6 months), finally make A smart move after a relationship fulla dumb ones...
How did your son respond to not seeing his dad most of the year? Does dad call often? Was there ever any struggle about not living with dad?
@Crizzy maybe you can answer this too, regarding your kids post split with their mom. I'm absolutely terrified that it'll be harder to bond with my daughters, and that they will be shaped to view me as an absentee father. Terrified of that thought...
Damn breh. Ima pray for you
Unfortunately, I’m starting to feel that I’m trending in the same direction. The worst part is that we moved literally across the country so I fear we’re both tryna make it work because of the move that we just made. The shyt is difficult af we literally in two different room overs a dumb ass argument that happened a couple hours ago smh.
like I said, I hope you figure it out. And I hope I do too smh
Unfortunately, I’m starting to feel that I’m trending in the same direction. The worst part is that we moved literally across the country so I fear we’re both tryna make it work because of the move that we just made. The shyt is difficult af we literally in two different room overs a dumb ass argument that happened a couple hours ago smh.
like I said, I hope you figure it out. And I hope I do too smh