Raising Another Man's Child

[Real N Quotes]

Sohh... Back around 2008, me and this chick became good friends, used to flirt but nothing serious at all cuz we both had a bf/gf.

Mid 2009, she gets pregnant by the same cat. She ends up having the baby which ultimately puts a strain on their relationship, and they split. When the baby is about 5 months, I break up with my girlfriend, and like 2 days later im in the box. We fool around with the idea for a bit then end up getting together a few months later.

We broke up, got back, broke up, blah blah... son was still taking care of his seed though and I had it made... I could slide through and kick it with her and the girl without having any financial obligations/had the freedom to bounce whenever.

The problem now is, now that we both have degrees, she wants me to get realllll serious; taking that "next" step, shacking up, all this shyt. All this is happening while the BD is slowly doing less and less as a father.

Long story short, I feel that if I get more serious with shorty, the BD is gonna completely leave and this will become MY CHILD. Crazy shyt is, my life aint too much different; I didn't know that my pops wasn't my pops until last year, cuz the nikka raised me since I was 3. I dont know if I have the heart to do it though, brehs..


What should I do

Only do it if you REALLY love this woman and you are SPIRITUALLY READY to be a HUSBAND and FATHER.

 

[twan83]

I don't see why more people don't have this outlook.

Not exactly the same situation but I'm adopted. Same with my sister. My father raised other men's children. That's just our family. We would NEVER think of disrespecting him by saying he isn't our real dad. If the dude really isn't there, don't think that a father figure isn't needed. It hasn't been mentioned yet but have you thought about having him sign over parental rights?

More importantly, how is your relationship with the girl? She worth getting serious with like that? What you definitely don't want happening is you becoming "daddy" and then y'all break up.

im married too her and my stepfather raised me while my real dad was running the streets and he still is also so i see my stepfather as my real dad regardless

 

[BallGame]

I don't see why more people don't have this outlook.

Not exactly the same situation but I'm adopted. Same with my sister. My father raised other men's children. That's just our family. We would NEVER think of disrespecting him by saying he isn't our real dad. If the dude really isn't there, don't think that a father figure isn't needed. It hasn't been mentioned yet but have you thought about having him sign over parental rights?

More importantly, how is your relationship with the girl? She worth getting serious with like that? What you definitely don't want happening is you becoming "daddy" and then y'all break up.

For all the coochie that I got during college, it was only two girls that could slow me down... and she's one of em. Love the girl to death, but she has some obvious flaws. All of our arguments revolve around her wanting me to move in with her, but she stays 45 mins from my job and I live like 20 seconds from my job now. We're not technically together, but thats really just a matter of semantics. Me living in a college town still with 19+'s running around dont help either

 

[DonkeyPuncher718]

its lots of dudes takin care of other people's kids. stop worrying about how you think this will "look" to other people. its more common than u think. except on the-coli...............

One of the realest post I ever read

Had to give you pos rep on that one

 

[Rawtid]

For all the coochie that I got during college, it was only two girls that could slow me down... and she's one of em. Love the girl to death, but she has some obvious flaws. All of our arguments revolve around her wanting me to move in with her, but she stays 45 mins from my job and I live like 20 seconds from my job now. We're not technically together, but thats really just a matter of semantics. Me living in a college town still with 19+'s running around dont help either

Don't live with a female you're not married to.

 

[BallGame]

Don't live with a female you're not married to.

ehhhh, I would never get married to a woman that I hadn't lived with first. All those hidden weaknesses get exposed then. Especially if the lease is in her name (which it is), I could realistically just jet

 

[havoc00]

dont do it, that dude cause hes the dad has the true keys to that p*ssy and he can make a power move when he wants leaving u left out like a bytch, fukk that kid and that bytch leave them both in a pair of bushes

 

[twan83]

Damn breh you lost. It costs an average of $250,000 from age 1-18 to raise a child.That nikka got to hit it raw, bust inside the bytch and left you to foot the bill You gonna start paying his car note too?

Homie

He probably out every weekend fukking a different bytch while you at home taking care of his responsibility

na he aint really he bout to go to jail for lack of child support and domestic abuse to his soon to be ex wife



He probably out every weekend fukking a different bytch while you at home taking care of his responsibility

this statement here i can this i had my fun fukking different females every weekend and i became a mature adult and father when i was ready and took on another man's child with no regret cuz my own father by law stepfather did the same thing and he is still with my mother and has been for over 20 yrs.

while u got dudes running the streets doing their thing his child is being raised by a REAL MAN & FATHER who wont abandon her

as far as him hitting it so what it was before i met her anyways and if she is stupid enough to try to pull that stunt and go back to him

SHE CAN GO RIGHT AHEAD HER LOST ON LOSING OUT ON A REAL MAN THAT DOES THE RIGHT THING


only person she hurting is the kids we have together SIMPLE AS THAT

i dont dwell on shyt like that either nor am i insecure bout it im a very confident good looking dude that is very responsible and reliable

one thing i learned is YOU CAN'T STOP PEOPLE FROM DOING STUPID shyt

 

[havoc00]

its lots of dudes takin care of other people's kids. stop worrying about how you think this will "look" to other people. its more common than u think. except on the-coli...............

Being a fakkit is "common" outside of the coli also, does that make it right?

 

[Sonic Boom of the South]

Alot of people who give advice about this situation have never been in that situation
which makes their opinion useless

the situation varies on the relationship between the parent, how well the child is disciplined and so on

shyt is not easy

if you feel any doubt dont do it

in all honesty, you make a sacrifice being with a woman with a child so she better be fukking worth it

 

[MikelArteta]

dudes just love to make their life much harder than it is.



Sent from royalty breh

 

[MikelArteta]

its lots of dudes takin care of other people's kids. stop worrying about how you think this will "look" to other people. its more common than u think. except on the-coli...............

http://menshealth.about.com/od/lifestyle/a/paternity.htm



Sent from royalty breh

 

[MikelArteta]

the BD may not want to have shyt to do with the BM..

i dont think i could do that shyt, but some nikkas are about that life.

please, most baby moms are givjng it up to that a$$hole whenever he comes by.

it amazes me how dudds are willing to and go from thanks your gonna make a great dad to me and jerdervian are going to try ad work it out for quinvarious sake.

Sent from royalty breh

 

[Klyk21]

Sohh... Back around 2008, me and this chick became good friends, used to flirt but nothing serious at all cuz we both had a bf/gf.

Mid 2009, she gets pregnant by the same cat. She ends up having the baby which ultimately puts a strain on their relationship, and they split. When the baby is about 5 months, I break up with my girlfriend, and like 2 days later im in the box. We fool around with the idea for a bit then end up getting together a few months later.

We broke up, got back, broke up, blah blah... son was still taking care of his seed though and I had it made... I could slide through and kick it with her and the girl without having any financial obligations/had the freedom to bounce whenever.

The problem now is, now that we both have degrees, she wants me to get realllll serious; taking that "next" step, shacking up, all this shyt. All this is happening while the BD is slowly doing less and less as a father.

Long story short, I feel that if I get more serious with shorty, the BD is gonna completely leave and this will become MY CHILD. Crazy shyt is, my life aint too much different; I didn't know that my pops wasn't my pops until last year, cuz the nikka raised me since I was 3. I dont know if I have the heart to do it though, brehs..


What should I do

How old are you?

 

[BallGame]

How old are you?

23