Share what a toxic relationship has taught you

[CodeBlaMeVi]

1. Never let a woman get too comfortable. She needs to know that any day can be her last with you.

2. If a woman is trying to put rules on you (you can’t do this or that) outside of no cheating or no kicking her ass, check her immediately. She’s not your mother and a relationship isn’t you asking for a personal manager.

3. The minute you catch her in a lie, just know that most of what you thought you knew about her has been a lie.

4. If she’s cheating with you, she’ll eventually cheat on you. fukk them and keep it moving. Don’t ghost, just always be busy.

5. If she’s always talking trash about her ex, she was just as trash. Otherwise, why did she put up with that behavior?

6. The types of friends she has is the type of woman she really is deep down.

7. If she casually discusses sex with past partners or compares your meat to other dude’s meat as a compliment, she’s a ho.

8. If she needs you to do dirty shyt to her to cum or needs to do weird shyt to you, go get tested.

9. If she likes coke (the bear kind) she’s probably had a train ran on her before or at least was in a threesome.

10. If she’s a scammer, you’re getting set up for an eventual scam to be ran on you.

11. If her mother wants to suck your dikk, don’t let her. Not worth the headache.

 

[Wig Twistin Season]

I’ve had THREE mothers of different women a. Ask about my dikk size/to see my dikk b. Show me her p*ssy and titties but tried to play it off like she was drunk c. straight up beg me to bust a nut on her titties.

 

[Koapa]

As a dude who is recovering from a toxic relationship, most of what yall are saying is hella true.

1.Unresolved Mommy/Daddy issues is a no go.

2.If she needs daily affirmation is a no go.

3.If you have to tame down your happiness because she's always unhappy, RUN.

4.If you have to explain male friends and boundaries to a grown woman, RUN.

5.If she treats strangers (waiters, cashiers, etc) like shyt, RUN.

6.If she has issues with her girl friends, most likely she's the problem, Leave.

7.Wont seek therapy when she know she has issues, no go.

8.Always thinking negative, RUN.

 

[Oatmeal]

boundaries


something similar to this. who you date is a reflection of what you think of yourself.

if you're into fat ugly brehette/brehs, you think thats what you deserve and how you feel about yourself

Then why don't Ashanti and Keri Hilson ever respond to my DMs breh?!!

 

[DropTopDoc]

Accept people for who they are and act accordingly .

This is underrated, and so true

Things I’ve learned

Don’t ever doubt how you are a catch( women want marriage no matter what and if only 1 out of 4 get it, the odds in your favor)

What she preach the most is exactly what she needs to work on or do

You can’t love a woman into healing

If she’s always negative nothing will change that

If she never got therapy from her child hood or parental issues back away

If you gotta seek peace elsewhere run

Advocate for yourself, just because you are a man does not mean you can’t be happy

 

[DropTopDoc]

Them women that say they out the way, untouched, or be posting shyt about good women, the main one that’s gon waste your time and not be on shyt

 

[International Playa]

Don't tolerate BS & disrespect because she is a dyme.

I learnt its better to have an average woman (aslong as she gets your dikk hard) who treats you like a king & worships the ground you walk on.

Looks fade, get a good woman of good character.

 

[Peter Popoff]

boundaries


something similar to this. who you date is a reflection of what you think of yourself.

if you're into fat ugly brehette/brehs, you think thats what you deserve and how you feel about yourself

I don't think he's talking about looks from personal experience. He's talking about personality traits.

 

[MikelArteta]

RUN

 

[Savvir]

women will lie about who they are just to get with you...

Personally, I couldn't conceive of a chick wanting to be with me so bad she had to create elaborate lies just to look like my type...

but that type of shyt is common as fukk I guess... i know what to look for now

I learnt its better to have an average woman (aslong as she gets your dikk hard) who treats you like a king & worships the ground you walk on.

Looks fade, get a good woman of good character.

 

[colicolicoli]

that I’m toxic

 

[Vandelay]

Set standards and expectations early.

 

[EffedUp]

That they don't care. A person will enter into your life, like a tornado, and tear it apart. Leaving you to pick up the pieces. Not only will they not care, they'll pretend not to know why you function the way that you do. As if they have nothing to do with it. They'll gaslight you, tell you they were good to you, blame you for the problems they caused and go right on about their life with not a care in the world. A narcissist is an absolute cancer to anyone who actually has the capacity to care about them.

people justify their partners’ toxic behavior by highlighting the small things they were good at while ignoring the large flaws that ultimately left them in shambles. The REAL 80/20 rule.

This right here is a big reason why me and my "homegirl" ain't cool no more.
Known shorty for a long time and was close like family. Her nikka breaks up with her a yr. ago (off and on relationship for like 10 yrs) despite everything she did for him. While everyone agreed it was for the best, she ultimately wouldn't allow herself to truly move on. This year goes to shyt for her (lazy ass daughter, struggling financially, work problems, etc.). Hits her lowest point when her mom died. She could've used that as a reality check and start healing to move forward. Instead she refuses sound advice, proceeds to cut people off (like myself) and ultimately run back to this nikka.
Forget all the shyt he put you through emotionally and mentally. It's cool cause he's financially secure, got a nice house and lets you play "step-mom" to his kids.

 

[The Guru]

Know when to hold em and know when to fold em.

 

[EffedUp]

Like others said, don't ignore red flags or justify questionable behavior.

My sister's first husband had obvious flags. Type of nikka who had mommy issues and used it to justify his shytty behavior. Stays with him for 6+ yrs. and months after divorcing finds out he violated big time. nikka's lucky he's not taking a dirt nap right now.
Also watched my brother waste years with a leech when everybody (her family included) told him who she was day one.

I'll admit my own insecurities is the main reason I haven't had a serious relationship. For one I'm not very trusting and as a result, I will abort at the first sign of trouble. I know I've dodged some bullets though.