Essential The Locker Room's Random Thoughts

[DreadHead P]

i'm in class right now, just found out the lil cutie behind me that i been plottin on his pregnant

 

[ProfessionallyTrill]

When i was with her, her weight was never a real issue w me cuz she was beautiful and i was inlove w the babe.

Went thru my boys camera the other day and he stillnhad new years pix in there and saw several w me and the ex and holy moly, she was a big gurl.

I mean: i still miss her. Reminisce when we would meet up at random rendezvou point.

Shiit was my first real relationship. And even tho she was kinda crazy and red flags\signals left and right... She was consistently there for me and u dont get that kind of frequency in the dating realm.

I dont wanna jump from gurl to gurl, cuz testing all these waters n philandering is exhausting and so many flake sitchayshuns and/or flat out ignoring until its convenient for them to repond... A man can only take so much.

Love is real hard to find, yet i keep reading threads n reponses bout dudes committing that infidelity.

I want to be able to have somebody text me random that they love me. Go watch a movie anytime. Try a new restaurant. Take spontaneous trips to the coast. Bring me food at work or... Do something special for me just becuz.

Doggies... I miss that shyt.

Sometimes i put on this casanova facade w the ladies cuz i assume thats what they want. But he reality is that im just a one trick pony with a scorned saddle and a missing horse shoe.

So how the hell am i posed to play a legit game of horse shoes.


"A game of horse shoes!!!"


*sighs*


to u dudes who have someone special in ur lives: pls do me a faor and cherish and embrace the babe. Stare into her eyes real deep. Because what u see in there... Lies a soul of a woman who has been captivated by a man who loves her enough that whether thru thick n thin, good n bad, terrible or terrific, she gon ride for her dude til the proverbial relationship wheels fall off.

*lights candle and plays piano in the dark as the pale moon light reflects the light of a love that only he once knew... And as the harmony of love sonically glistens from the skies... Sadly, he continues of create the melody for a companion no more.*

And these are the notes of an angel... With an empty heart.

.

.

Man you must've been high as shyt when you wrote that

 

[DaChampIsHere]

Got pulled over speeding, driving drunk and high as hell late last night

I saw them cherries and blueberries light up, I was like fuuuuuuck. Mind you I don't have insurance and my tags are expired, 2 years expired AND I have hella unpaid tickets on my car.

First thing the cops said were that my tags were dead. Took my license and errthang. Told him I didn't have insurance. Came back and told me to step out the car.

I ain't never been frisked before, but I was last night. Did the walk the line test and alphabet test. I passed though. I was scared as fukk. I'm too handsome for jail.

Then out of nowhere he held out his hand to shake mine and this nikka gripped me up He was a bruh

Gave me hella warning tickets and told me to go home and get my shyt together. Said he pulled me over to fukk with me after he saw my frat plate cover.

That's my bruh That was the ultimate haze that he gave me though. Damn, that shyt had me.

Next time I'm just gonna stay where I'm at for the night. That's what I get for being an a$$hole. Now I gotta go get all this shyt taken care of

 

[ProfessionallyTrill]

I'm gonna have to put my plates on now

Too many bruhs down here not to. Lucky brake for real

 

[source]

those new dunkin donuts oreo donuts

 

[DaChampIsHere]

I'm gonna have to put my plates on now

Too many bruhs down here not to. Lucky brake for real

The luckiest break ever no doubt I'm definitely supposed to be in jail right now

I just be doin' stupid shyt. Two years ago I had a warrant out for my arrest in GA because I called for jury duty, but I wasn't living there. Couldn't go see my family for the longest

I don't be thinkin' about that shyt.

 

[Rawtid]

No insurance on these whips, tags all outdated, I may not be shyt to you but my mama thinks I made it

 

[Lord Beasley]

anyone have that one coworker, who just wasnt attractive at all, yet for some reason you wanted to bash them guts?

 

[Panther]

Trying thai for lunch... First time so lets hope me and my stomach don't regret it

 

[patscorpio]

Trying thai for lunch... First time so lets hope me and my stomach don't regret it

thai is the shyt but yeah if you fukk with the extra spicy dishes like i do..you'll def spend some time in the bathroom

 

[Panther]

anyone have that one coworker, who just wasnt attractive at all, yet for some reason you wanted to bash them guts?

Yep, the receptionist in my office... Total buttaface but her body

 

[Lord Beasley]

Yep, the receptionist in my office... Total buttaface but her body

sad thing is her body is but for some reason i know, without a shadow of a doubt, that her headgame se magnifique! and i would like to showcase my secret equestrian skills whilst riding that beast.

 

[DaChampIsHere]

This white girl is really tryna get at me. I just can't do it though

 

[Blown Moon]

Really breh? You gonna ask us if we have kids knowing that we don't, wait for us to about it and then give us the "are you gonna ask me" look; I ask and you say your wife just had a miscarriage, and you've been trying to have a baby for a long time

fukking downer ass nikka always hitting nikkas with awkward moments

 

[Blown Moon]

I really tried to write real nikkas in an office but there were problems.

1. How did real nikkas break into corporate america? Maybe one of them was dating the bosses daughter got her preggers, so the boss puts him on, so he can care for his soon to be born grandchild and the dude wouldn't work unless the homies were allowed but naw.

2. The office setting would get boring after awhile and you can only write about sneaking to smoke weed, getting caught by the most socially awkward white boy in the office, fading away then coming back to the white boy being sky high but so many times.

3. Who would be the target demo? I don't think real nikkas would watch it, too busy doing real nikka shyt, corporate nikkas wouldn't watch it on some "we deal with enough stereotyping bullshyt as is" type shyt. 3. Cacs wouldn't watch it on some "we deal with this irl already" type shyt

*sigh* real nikkas in the office never had a chance