I feel you. I used to be so skinny and known for my flat stomach then one day in my 20s especially after moving down south, getting a car and a desk job it stopped being flat.
Now, I got cellulite around my midsection and since I have small breasts, my stomach looks even worst proportion wise. I got a gym membership, discovered dairy makes me bloated even tried going vegan but Im just not consistent.
Thats probably one of my worst traits inconsistency. My only advice is break your goals up into smaller baby steps, take it one day at a time and try not to get discouraged. Get back on the horse as soon as you can. To be human is to err, so dont beat your self up.
I stopped using the scale and use my tape measure or my clothing size, especially since I lift. (I need to do more cardio and better my diet) but anyway muscle is denser/heavier than fat so you can work out and actually gain lbs but look/feel better.
). Finally scheduled an appointment with a CBT. I really didnt want to because I thought going this route basically validates the disorder. But I'm tired of this sadness and guilt and fear I feel everyday for repetative thoughts I know I would never in my worst nightmares action on. Bought to take my life back 
. Pray for me brothers
My recent hypomanic episode cause me to miss a date with this blonde goth chick Ive been seeing lately. As I was leaving the package store I noticed my eyes were really heavy and that I was not gonna be able to drive to her place (an hour away). I tell her I gonna rest a bit and around 5 hours later I get text from her asking if Im ok, did I OD, and shyt like that. Even my mama tried getting a hold of me.
but now this depressive episode has me feeling like 
.
