Religion/Spirituality The official Bizarre Bible Stories Thread

Slaimon Khan Shah

SLAIMON KHAN SHAH = SHAOLIN MONK/S OF ISLAAM
Joined
Nov 8, 2012
Messages
15,910
Reputation
2,180
Daps
18,977
Reppin
Denver, Colorado, United States of America
All islam gives you is a lifetime of water boarding then an eternity in the flames of yahweh

BISMILLAHIR RAHMANIR RAHEEM. PLEASE AVOID THE BLASPHEMOUS LIES, AS THE MOST MERCIFULL CREATOR, SEES ALL, KNOWS ALL, AND HEARS ALL. FEAR THE CREATOR, AND FEAR THE PUNISHMENT OF THE FIRE.
 

Mowgli

Veteran
Joined
May 1, 2012
Messages
104,372
Reputation
14,159
Daps
246,525
I think you would know more about that than me, but even then, I can say that it's certainly not as foolish as living your life cringing in fear of punishment from an inflated father figure.

:snoop: Poor fakkit.


(GOD IM TRYING WITH HIM I DONT KNOW IF I CAN WIN HIM OVER FOR YOU)
 

Mowgli

Veteran
Joined
May 1, 2012
Messages
104,372
Reputation
14,159
Daps
246,525
I WOULD LOVE TO SEE YOU BRING YOUR PASSION OVER TO ISLAM. IT'S THE GOOD LIFE, WHAT CAN I SAY! ETERNAL PARADISE AS WELL!

"Surely, those who believe, those who are the Jews and the Sabians and the Christians – whosoever believed in Allaah and the Last Day, and worked righteousness, on them shall be no fear, nor shall they grieve."
[al-Maa’idah 5:69]

We good over here but thanks for the offer. I reference the quran too. Theres jewelz in there.
 

Slaimon Khan Shah

SLAIMON KHAN SHAH = SHAOLIN MONK/S OF ISLAAM
Joined
Nov 8, 2012
Messages
15,910
Reputation
2,180
Daps
18,977
Reppin
Denver, Colorado, United States of America
"Surely, those who believe, those who are the Jews and the Sabians and the Christians – whosoever believed in Allaah and the Last Day, and worked righteousness, on them shall be no fear, nor shall they grieve."
[al-Maa’idah 5:69]

We good over here but thanks for the offer. I reference the quran too. Theres jewelz in there.

SURAH 3 AYAT 85 And whoever desires other than Islam as religion - never will it be accepted from him, and he, in the Hereafter, will be among the losers. The Noble Qur'an - ?????? ??????
COME ON BROTHER IN HUMANITY. JOIN THE MUSLIMS AND BELIEVERS SURELEY YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT.
 

Robbie3000

Veteran
Supporter
Joined
May 20, 2012
Messages
32,625
Reputation
6,510
Daps
145,302
Reppin
NULL
Ive been thinking about one day 10 years or so taking advantage of a sexy milf who is God fearing and pretending im a hardcore religious person.....

Those broads get crazy with the sex game when they fukking for the Lord

"Your a young man in your early 30s with a successful career as an electrical engineer, a nice home, superb credit rating, nice car, impeccable dress style,etc......The Lord certainly has blessed you my brother !!! What do I have to do for him to do the same for a poor woman like me........."


:shaq:

:shaq:

Hah you should hit up Christian Mingle

:shaq:
 

Non Sequitur

Creep.
Joined
May 7, 2012
Messages
12,834
Reputation
1,510
Daps
21,090
Reppin
The 3rd Degree
In all seriousness though, its been way too long. Old Testament and New Testament are certifiable classics. But I think it is time that boy Yahweh hits up with another classic to complete the trinity.

:smugbiden:

220px-RealTestament.jpg


He's been speaking through the noble prophet Plies :youngsabo:
 

you're NOT "n!ggas"

FKA ciroq drobama
Supporter
Joined
May 1, 2012
Messages
14,638
Reputation
6,284
Daps
63,414
Reppin
Astronomy (8th light)

for real though, what the fukk was god thinking, making the knowledge of good and evil through something edible like a FRUIT? :what: let alone adam and eve for a minute, he commanded THEM not to eat from it but they're in an ecosystem nikka :leostare: its a garden full of other animals that could eat it just as easily and then what? nikka the serpent aint just talking, its calling you on your bullshyt :damn: you don't think it ate that shyt first? :mindblown: if it told eve, who else did it tell??? all this horrible planning and somehow its OUR fault :comeon:
 

Julius Skrrvin

I be winkin' through the scope
Joined
May 28, 2012
Messages
16,318
Reputation
3,285
Daps
30,749
:snoop: Poor fakkit.


(GOD IM TRYING WITH HIM I DONT KNOW IF I CAN WIN HIM OVER FOR YOU)

thats how you try and win people over? call them fakkits and tell them everything they do and think is wrong and constantly get in petty squabbles with them?

:dwillhuh:
 

keepemup

Banned
Joined
Jun 9, 2012
Messages
4,740
Reputation
-1,008
Daps
5,345
for real though, what the fukk was god thinking, making the knowledge of good and evil through something edible like a FRUIT? :what: let alone adam and eve for a minute, he commanded THEM not to eat from it but they're in an ecosystem nikka :leostare: its a garden full of other animals that could eat it just as easily and then what? nikka the serpent aint just talking, its calling you on your bullshyt :damn: you don't think it ate that shyt first? :mindblown: if it told eve, who else did it tell??? all this horrible planning and somehow its OUR fault :comeon:

What?
 

Mr. Somebody

Friend Of A Friend
Joined
May 10, 2012
Messages
28,262
Reputation
2,012
Daps
43,625
Reppin
Los Angeles
we dont all fear your invisible father figure. the fact that you think we are all born into such mental slavery is absolutely disgusting.

your flavor of the month religion doesnt have one more shred of credibility than the older ones you pass off as myths. you havent addressed any of the :scusthov: stories in this thread, youve just called us 'evil sinners' :laff:

The world is the way it is now because of atheism. Its obvious what the fruit of your beliefs is, demonic garbage.
 

the cac mamba

Banned
Joined
May 21, 2012
Messages
111,880
Reputation
14,195
Daps
317,040
Reppin
NULL
The world is the way it is now because of atheism. Its obvious what the fruit of your beliefs is, demonic garbage.

oh really, cuz last time i checked atheists are a minority in most countries

:belip:

also, your argument is tired because religious people act immorally all the time. so to blame atheism for a moralless society is retarded

are you really gonna sit there and tell me that atheism is ruining society when you cant even get elected in this country as an open atheist? are you really gonna tell me that the atheist agenda carries more weight than the religious agenda? :what:
 
Top