Vandelay
Life is absurd. Lean into it.
1-3 days is enough. You have bigger problems if it lasts longer than that.
Training your partner = Emotional Abuse?
- Thread starter Music Fiend
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1-3 days is enough. You have bigger problems if it lasts longer than that.
Its funny to me that its the women in hear disagreeing
From my experience it seems that women know deep down that they are trying to manipulate you
So leaving them alone gives them time to think about her actions and how they are ineffective on you
They usually come to their senses and apologize on their own
Sometimes talking to them doesn't work due to their rebellious nature
Taking away your attention usually lets them know they are fukking up
If she fukks someone else so what i believe its better to be alone with peace of mind and your self respect
Than to have a power stuggle with a dumb bytch
From my experience it seems that women know deep down that they are trying to manipulate you
So leaving them alone gives them time to think about her actions and how they are ineffective on you
They usually come to their senses and apologize on their own
Sometimes talking to them doesn't work due to their rebellious nature
Taking away your attention usually lets them know they are fukking up
If she fukks someone else so what i believe its better to be alone with peace of mind and your self respect
Than to have a power stuggle with a dumb bytch
PlainSight
Anon
If she's pissing me off that badly, I'll leave. What am I "training" her for? Is she a dog? 
It's a grey area, but manipulation of that degree could count as emotional abuse.
To me, communication >>>>>>> all.
It's a grey area, but manipulation of that degree could count as emotional abuse. To me, communication >>>>>>> all.
Music Fiend
Superstar
Don't be naive and negative.
Not true. Pimp shyt is all based on principles and credibility, respect.
This principle may sound basic. But it's very deep. I know real pimps who don't have game as deep as this podcast gets.
Mars its different from female to male.
All based on the idea that a male should always be based on principle and firm and know where to steer. While the chick is there for the ride.
If you want someone who is subservient and unquestioning, why don't you just find someone who is subservient and unquestioning instead of trying to break /train someone who's not? It probably won't work in the long term and you just have to start all over again with a new one
No woman I've ever met in life is subservient and unquestioning. I'd go as far to say every chick I've pulled and dealt with was selfish and self serving as long as her logic lined up with her emotion in the moment.
Even in my personal life , women have given me tests all the time to make sure I can handle them and check them.
you obviously miss the art where I ask everyone to explain how those situations should be handled. If a woman I've been seeing for a period of time without committing even though we are alreadys exually involved then she switches up and tells me I have to commit in order to get sex.If you're unable to communicate and have to resort to these tactics, YOU ARE NOT FIT for a relationship with a woman.
Either you're a real man or you're a pimp/fakkit, BUT YOU CANT BE BOTH. Remember a fakkit/pimp are the same thing. It's just a fakkit has come to terms with the fact that he just wants to fukk other men. Both him and the pimp hate women, but the pimp wants to play games because he's more of a coward and can't just admit he wants some diqq.
There's a lot of maturity required to be in a healthy relationship. If you don't respect women enough to treat them accordingly, then I just don't see women as being for you. Because you value men and their opinions/feelings OVER women, then honestly you probably should date men. At least you'll respect them.
That is equally emotionally abusive. IMO, by disciplining her (sounds bad but continue to read), you hold her accountable for your actions as long as the intent is real, fair and reasonable.
you make
If I've been seeing you for 3 months, and we're sexual but not committed yet, and then u hit me with I can't get any until we're committed.
That's integrity amnesia. You signed up for something on the front end and now that your emotions have changed you disagree with it.
It's cool we all change our minds and stuff but you cannot be mad at a person for expecting better.
If she's pissing me off that badly, I'll leave. What am I "training" her for? Is she a dog?
To me, communication >>>>>>> all.
You are very confused. I'm not advocating not communicating. At all. Communication is important. If I have done my best to communicate my desires, through my actions, and conversation but you want to manipulate me through withholding or changing the relationship, putting pressure on me to rush, or thinking I should be of your beliefs....
Then it feels foolish to even entertain that.
It's usually only used when a chick is on a power trip, and I have to remind her she can leave.
One of dantes examples stem from a chick he was dating and spent hrs prepping to take her to dinner. She complained from the car to ordering at the restaurant. About something he should have done when the reality was she was entitled and felt she des ever something without bringing anything to the table.
He explained he just wanted to have a good night and didn't want to argu or hear her complain. She continued on....
So after she ordered and thought she was going to sit there and eat his food while she nagged. He had the waiter cancel her order... And tell her I'm not paying for your meal to nourish your body and give you energy so you can complain.
Action Mike
All praise..
If you're unable to communicate and have to resort to these tactics, YOU ARE NOT FIT for a relationship with a woman.
Either you're a real man or you're a pimp/fakkit, BUT YOU CANT BE BOTH. Remember a fakkit/pimp are the same thing. It's just a fakkit has come to terms with the fact that he just wants to fukk other men. Both him and the pimp hate women, but the pimp wants to play games because he's more of a coward and can't just admit he wants some diqq.
There's a lot of maturity required to be in a healthy relationship. If you don't respect women enough to treat them accordingly, then I just don't see women as being for you. Because you value men and their opinions/feelings OVER women, then honestly you probably should date men. At least you'll respect them.
Passive aggressive as fukkWhen a chick starts tryna control me, or tell me what's going to happen, or deliver an ultimatum. I go ghost and remove my love and affection. Immediately. Could be for a day, a week, a month, or for good depending on the offense.
I'm kind of mean and always thought maybe it wasn't healthy... but maybe it is...
Is ignoring someone for a period of time as a result of something they said or did that you felt was not respectful, abusive? Would talking things out be better and explaining why you don't like xyz be better?
If y'all can't talk things out don't be together.
If your only options are passive aggression or ceaseless emotional drama just save the headaches and walk away.
Action Mike
All praise..
This shyt is step 1 of the last resort btw, yeah communicate first.
.༼-◕_◕-༽.
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If a woman is putting you through changes and drama, then phucc her. If you're being straight forward and she is playing games, then you need to definitely leave her alone if you are unable to speak to her and have a reasonable conversation. If a woman wants to change the game after you've begun an intimate relationship it's because she insecure and she does not know how to express what she wants from the beginning.
She WANTED to fucc but now she wants respect or commitment after the fact.
She cannot be taken seriously
PlainSight
Anon
Talk about manipulation, then use manipulation/emotional abuse to combat the manipulation
It's funny, because I actually think manipulation is amoral and not inherently bad, but to use manipulation to manufacture an outcome that only benefits you at the potential expense of another is textbook abuse. But the sky is also blue, so I'm gonna allow the cooking to continue
That was stupid advice. If anything you pour on the affection affection and reward while training.
Something like this is better
Something like this is better
It's funny, because I actually think manipulation is amoral and not inherently bad, but to use manipulation to manufacture an outcome that only benefits you at the potential expense of another is textbook abuse. But the sky is also blue, so I'm gonna allow the cooking to continue
I agree.
I want to know exactly what they are talking about when they say manipulation. It really sounds like two people who are supposed to be grown playing games. If both parties have to go through all that, why are y'all even together? Like you said previously if it gets to that point you should have been gone.
Solo ✧✦✧
King of the eXoticals. "FIRsT and LAst wARNiNg"
A lot of soft thinking is being pushed as expected, but I suppose the ignore method only works with certain types of women. I don't know about every type of woman since I have only closely dealt with women who I connect with and who have character traits that I like, but some women will get it and some won't. For me being direct and telling a woman about something I have a problem with the first time it happens is a good thing to do and if they still don't get the point then it's best for me to just move on and give more attention to other stuff. Maybe it's because life is stressful to me and I don't have time to be talking stuff out and explaining stuff to someone over and over when they clearly know that I don't like something yet continues to do it. If other people want to do that then they can, but not everybody wants to put up with that.
Mowgli explained it very well and like he said, you need to find women who are selfless. They actually will pay attention to what you have to say and try to please your desires just as long as you're worth it to them.
Mowgli explained it very well and like he said, you need to find women who are selfless. They actually will pay attention to what you have to say and try to please your desires just as long as you're worth it to them.
I like to try to be as objective as possible, if my girl doesn't like something, I try to see it from her point of view and sometimes I agree with her and try to change. Most of the time, she's going through one of her illogical moods and you just have to give her a day to come back to her senses. I learned a while ago, arguing with a creature who powers off of emotion is a losing fight for both parties, because she's going to bring up some stuff that's WAYYYY off base and has nothing to do with anything really, at that point you're just becoming more frustrated just by the argument in itself. When she gets like this now, I just hit her with a whatever and waits for her to call me back later in the day.
Obviously some issues you should discuss like grown adult. But let's keep it 100 Coli females, y'all be bringing up and trying to start fights over irrelevant shyt just cause.
Obviously some issues you should discuss like grown adult. But let's keep it 100 Coli females, y'all be bringing up and trying to start fights over irrelevant shyt just cause.
marriage and commitment has some special challenges
as i've typed before, you come home to that person whether your day was 1/10 or 10/10
i think those wheels lux posted are a nice idea, but they assume people who have had a shytty day have the cognitive resources to "talk" and "listen" productively
so when most needed,, that "equality" wheel is a fool's dream
some people are born abusers
but even normal people can lose control when tolerance is low and frustration is high
so strategies are needed for these situations
so i wouldn't use the word "training" your partner
but for the good of the relationship, you do need to learn how to manage their highs and particularly their lows
otherwise the excess acid can eat away at your marriage
as i've typed before, you come home to that person whether your day was 1/10 or 10/10
i think those wheels lux posted are a nice idea, but they assume people who have had a shytty day have the cognitive resources to "talk" and "listen" productively
so when most needed,, that "equality" wheel is a fool's dream
some people are born abusers
but even normal people can lose control when tolerance is low and frustration is high
so strategies are needed for these situations
my wife (rip) was a great woman
but probably 2x a week she'd (still) be in a "bad mood" after 7pm
(we always gave each other some decompresion time)
by that hour, the only person around her was me
so i'd become the target or friction point for her free-floating angst
half the time she didn't know what the problem was
so clearly "talking/listening" is of no use
sometimes she was stessed about having to be ms. proper at work
or just a random comment somene said at 2:41pm had startd pissing her off at 3:13pm after she had a chance to ruminate
but if it had been on her mind for 4+ hours.. welp
so something has nothing to do with me, or our marriage
but i was the one there
and as we became adults..
past coping mechanisms like getting high or drunk seemed less appealing
and she couldn't call her girlfriends at 9:15pm because they were married w/ kids
so when i see she was gonna be in a mood, i had three responses to her..
first (most preferable) was vigorous sex
like i would literally fukk the bytch out of her
apart from exercise, sex is the best way to burn off extra energy
help her relax
depending on the vague cause, backup #1 was roleplaying where i would humiliate her (consensual activities)
backup #2 was to treat her like a child and give her micromanage'ish chores like a hard-to-please daddy (also consensual)
each of those would be like 5 or 6 times per year
but it would release the tension she was feeling so she'd be 100% by next morning
but probably 2x a week she'd (still) be in a "bad mood" after 7pm
(we always gave each other some decompresion time)
by that hour, the only person around her was me
so i'd become the target or friction point for her free-floating angst
half the time she didn't know what the problem was
so clearly "talking/listening" is of no use
sometimes she was stessed about having to be ms. proper at work
or just a random comment somene said at 2:41pm had startd pissing her off at 3:13pm after she had a chance to ruminate
but if it had been on her mind for 4+ hours.. welp
so something has nothing to do with me, or our marriage
but i was the one there
and as we became adults..
past coping mechanisms like getting high or drunk seemed less appealing
and she couldn't call her girlfriends at 9:15pm because they were married w/ kids
so when i see she was gonna be in a mood, i had three responses to her..
first (most preferable) was vigorous sex
like i would literally fukk the bytch out of her
apart from exercise, sex is the best way to burn off extra energy
help her relax
depending on the vague cause, backup #1 was roleplaying where i would humiliate her (consensual activities)
backup #2 was to treat her like a child and give her micromanage'ish chores like a hard-to-please daddy (also consensual)
each of those would be like 5 or 6 times per year
but it would release the tension she was feeling so she'd be 100% by next morning
but for the good of the relationship, you do need to learn how to manage their highs and particularly their lows
otherwise the excess acid can eat away at your marriage