The Online Personals Experiment
A few years ago, I recruited two friends to assist in an experiment using an online personals service. They both signed up and paid for a 1 month membership on a very popular and well known online personals service. Let’s call my friends “Raheem” and “Jaheem”.
Raheem took a very nice picture of himself smiling, teeth showing, in a suit and tie. His profile was very descriptive. Single- never married, Education – MBA, Income $70K- $100K, Age 28, Likes: Sports, News, Spirituality, Fitness, Non-smoker, Social Drinker, Extrovert, 6’1”, Athletic build.
Raheem’s description was long, detailed, and descriptive. “Hello. I am a single man looking for the woman to spend my life with. I am involved in the banking industry and enjoy my job very much. I have no children but love children and would love to have a family of my own. I like to work out, attend worship services, go to nice clubs, attend the football games, go to arts events, work out, play chess, and go for long walks in the park.
The woman I would like to spend my life with would be a nice woman with family values. I don’t mind if she has children and how much she makes does not matter to me.
A perfect date for me would be a candlelight dinner, followed by a long walk in the park.
Maybe, we could sit on a park bench, under the moon and talk all night. I like to cuddle on cold winter nights and I am a very affectionate person.
I’m a great guy and I’m looking for a great woman to spend my life with.”
Jaheem took a very raw gritty of himself glaring into the camera like a straight up thug. Well, not exactly glaring, but emotionlessly looking into the webcam. His profile was not very descriptive. Age 28, 6’1”, Athletic build. There was no mention of current marital status, job, education, income, values, likes and dislikes, etc.
Jaheem’s description was downright stark “I keep my money right. I keep it real and don’t tolerate people who don’t. I don’t want to meet your mama. I demand respect. I’m not the one to play games with. Don’t start none – won’t be none.”
Both posted their profiles on the same day. We chose exactly 100 eligible black women in the area and both spent the entire day sending e-mails to those women stating their interest.
Note: All of these women CLAIMED in their profiles that they wanted decent black men for long term relationships. They all claimed they were good women and wanted good men.
Here’s how the responses broke down:
Raheem
(Decent Brother)
Jaheem
(Thug Brother)
Number of contacts made with black women
100
100
Total responses received
85
97
Number of black women who said they were not compatible
57
12
Number of black women who said they were already in a relationship
12
4
Number of black women that wanted more contact
16
81
Number of black women that voluntarily included their personal e-mail
2
34
Number of black women that voluntarily included their phone number
1
21
What was even more telling was this...
Out of the 57 women who told Raheem they were not compatible, 52 of those same women told Jaheem they wanted more contact!
Out of the 12 women that told Raheem they were already in a relationship, 10 of those women told Jaheem they wanted more contact. Out of those 10, 4 of them included their e- mail address to Jaheem and 3 of them included their phone number to Jaheem.
Over the course of the next 29 days...