Why are men expected to provide and protect?

[LeetStickMcGee]

We have a 72 percent out of wedlock birthrate. Most black children don't know what a functional relationship look like.

That don't even count the married fukked up people.

Then why does this thread exist? We talk about why are men expected to provide but we as a African American COLLECTIVE CANNOT. Other races and immigrants have no problem.

That's why we get people like Rick Banks saying stuff like "is marriage for white people?" and more and more people are "leaving" the collective. It is VERY concerning.

 

[Eddy Gordo]

OP came from a fatherless (or simply unhealthy) home & is speaking against traditional marriages. All while dragging women of similar circumstances for speaking on the same subject. It’s exactly the same thing. Anyone who doesn’t see that is speaking from ego & emotion....which is a killer to any healthy relationship, but I digress.

Op ain't speaking on shyt. The thread title is literally a question to fill in his gaps and the answers have been unsatisfying.

Then you got people without dikks giving they opinions on how to be a man like they would know when they dad wasn't even around.

Not the same thing

 

[Will Ross]

It is outdated. None of these things exist in Indian, white and Asian American households.

I observe these people all the time and these days most races in the western world view marriage and relationship as a partnership.

Black folks still having gender role debates

Bullshyt in those communities it ain’t no question to who is in charge. We argue gender roles more because a lot of women are in position of power in our community

 

[AAKing23]

Growing up and not seeing a functional healthy relationship leads to brehs who think like this.

Sucks because so many black people grow up in broken homes and we get a snowball effect.

At the end of the day men don't have a problem providing and protecting for a woman that they truly care for. In fact it's in a man's nature to do so without a woman even having to ask for it.


The problem is when men's worth becomes just that and only that.

And women start demanding they deserve that treatment off rip.

What if a man with full intentions of providing for and protecting his girl loses the ability to do so via an accident that leaves him in a wheelchair or loses his job unexpectedly, should he lose his value at that moment?

A man's value should also be tied with how he makes a woman feel and the character/qualities he possesses that makes him worthy of investing in. Any dude can just foot the bill but what about me makes me special to her?

The provide and protect role is not fully encompassing of what a relationship should be and it's dehumanizing for men to only be reduced to that.

 

[Eddy Gordo]

It's wild to me that there are dudes that don't think like this

It's wild that dudes don't think

"What would she do if I wasn't here?"

Maybe she should get a concealed carry permit

 

[LeetStickMcGee]

Your comfortable with black women having the white man to call on for protection I guess. Then yall wonder why black men ain't gettting respect. Call the white man should not always be your response

EXACTLY. If you don't provide, you WILL see more and more marrying OUT.

 

[Pure Water]

This thread, man

 

[BlackBall]

EXACTLY. If you don't provide, you WILL see more and more marrying OUT.

No strings attached seems the answer

 

[analog]

I've spent my entire life working to make something of myself and now that my fruits are starting to bloom. I realize that I don't wanna trade my resources or life just to have sex with a woman. It's not a good trade

And you shouldn't.

The only exception being IF you want children. It'd be in my best interest to provide and protect her so she can provide the full time care, love, and nurturing environment I'd want for my kids. I'm not about that day care life at all (nor raising them full time myself). This is all assuming this woman shares the same values and isn't one of these new age 50/50 type birds.

 

[JesusFOREVER]

if the gun toting gang banging neighbor saw u walking by and grabbed your ass and said "damn my nikka u looking thick" would u fight him?

clearly, there are circumstances you'd feel ok fighting the dude behind. if i'm not one of them, then you not my man. i don't even think in this scenario most women would let u actually go fight, they'd stop u at the door. but the guy would at least have to show a willingness to protect her

Women are fukking hilarious

As a man who has actual experience with “love” and marriage here let me tell you all the females in this thread are full of shyt and already playing their dumb ass little mind tricks

Like what kind of stupid shyt is this? “I don’t WANT you to fight this man who will probably shoot you but I want you to ACT like you will so I can stop you and feed my ego” man if you don’t get the fukk outta here

Women are selfish and destructive and it’s why I’ve become a bachelor in my later years

 

[Ashley Banks]

Knowing that the man is the leader of the relationship, period. Once she understands that, everything else starts from there

She'll be less combative, vindictive, passive aggressive, and undermining. Being a housewife doesn't automatically make a woman a true woman, just like being a career woman doesn't automatically make a woman a feminist


At the same, if a man abuses his leadership and becomes a dictator, he's not a true man

I’m a feminist and I agree I don’t really like the word leader though

 

[Ashley Banks]

Women are fukking hilarious

As a man who has actual experience with “love” and marriage here let me tell you all the females in this thread are full of shyt and already playing their dumb ass little mind tricks

Like what kind of stupid shyt is this? “I don’t WANT you to fight this man who will probably shoot you but I want you to ACT like you will so I can stop you and feed my ego” man if you don’t get the fukk outta here

Women are selfish and destructive and it’s why I’ve become a bachelor in my later years

I don’t remember saying this

 

[HarlemHottie]

I was never interested in being the sole provider of the household who dominates over his woman while she has little to no input on anything

I'm interested in an equal partnership not a pet that does what I say, I don't wanna rule over any woman

Exact same for me. It's really not complicated. It might be foolish but I just see women as equal to men in ability. That's how I was raised. Crazy that thinking like that trigger people that much.

But like some said in this thread, the women who think like this aren't for me and I'm not the man for them. It's going to be a power couple on my side.

A pet? Do you feel like your boss' pet? I don't do what he says. He sets goals and we work to meet them.

About power couples, nobody ever asks the obvious logistical questions, but how many power couples you know in real life? How long do those relationships last? How much debt do they incur, keeping up with two or more whole sets of peers? If she wants to move to another city for her career and your career is doing great in your city, who wins? Who does the cooking and cleaning, or do you hire those out (with all the drama that entails, strangers all through your house, etc)? The kinks haven't quite been worked out yet for totally equal relationships.

 

[Barnett114]

You're not going to get a logical or rational answer.

Damn, this is pathetic.

Two accounts that are 4 plus year old and are just posting for the first time

Who's aliases are these

 

[AAKing23]

A pet? Do you feel like your boss' pet? I don't do what he says. He sets goals and we work to meet them.

About power couples, nobody ever asks the obvious logistical questions, but how many power couples you know in real life? How long do those relationships last? How much debt do they incur, keeping up with two or more whole sets of peers? If she wants to move to another city for her career and your career is doing great in your city, who wins? Who does the cooking and cleaning, or do you hire those out (with all the drama that entails, strangers all through your house, etc)? The kinks haven't quite been worked out yet for totally equal relationships.

All this thread shows is that women do not truly want an egalitarian society