Why are men expected to provide and protect?

HarlemHottie

Uptown Thoroughbred
Joined
Jun 10, 2018
Messages
19,581
Reputation
12,974
Daps
81,527
Reppin
#ADOS
All this thread shows is that women do not truly want an egalitarian society:mjgrin:
What's funny is, I think they really do. If you had a choice to level up and society was encouraging you, you'd take the chance too. What woman in mainstream America don't want the chance to stunt on these hoes? #bossbytch :mjgrin:


It's just that nobody knows how to do it within real life constraints. By the time a woman finishes grad school, her clock is almost half up. Biology is real, and so is attraction. The simple math is, black men's labor is undervalued, which then throws gender relations out of wack. Black women making more money is not quite the answer:francis:. It worsens the imbalance, but I get the urge.
 

MischievousMonkey

Gor bu dëgër
Joined
Jun 5, 2018
Messages
19,646
Reputation
8,348
Daps
95,851
:mjlol:A pet? Do you feel like your boss' pet? I don't do what he says. He sets goals and we work to meet them.

About power couples, nobody ever asks the obvious logistical questions, but how many power couples you know in real life? How long do those relationships last? How much debt do they incur, keeping up with two or more whole sets of peers? If she wants to move to another city for her career and your career is doing great in your city, who wins? Who does the cooking and cleaning, or do you hire those out (with all the drama that entails, strangers all through your house, etc)? The kinks haven't quite been worked out yet for totally equal relationships.
I'm not tryna diss your relationship. You seem like you're coherent in your stance and fine with traditional gender roles so it's cool. Obviously it works for you and I'm glad. I'm just saying how I would feel about it if it was my wife.

Even the words you used ("do you feel like your boss' pet") bug me a little. I'm not trying to be my wife's boss. She's her own boss. I'm trying to be her partner in life. You said your husband set goals for both of yall. That's cool. I just want my wife to set them too.

Why would a couple where both people bring to the table generate more debt? It's the contrary, the household would make even more money.

If she wants to move then she moves and we can be distant for a while. Idk. Plenty solutions can be worked out together. Just like yall found solutions when your husband couldn't provide as much no more for a while.

We would both cook and clean :dahell: I can already do these by myself when I'm single, if I'm with another person it's half the job.

I feel like this issue might be cultural because this type of equal relationship is a given in many places.
 

analog

Superstar
Joined
Jun 21, 2012
Messages
5,445
Reputation
1,223
Daps
21,782
Reppin
Toronto
The male lions protects the pride from all the other animals. The female lions hunting means nothing without the male protection
If some hyenas give the lioness' some trouble while grabbing the groceries, who come through with the quickness to stomp them out?
 

HarlemHottie

Uptown Thoroughbred
Joined
Jun 10, 2018
Messages
19,581
Reputation
12,974
Daps
81,527
Reppin
#ADOS
I'm not tryna diss your relationship. You seem like you're coherent in your stance and fine with traditional gender roles so it's cool. Obviously it works for you and I'm glad. I'm just saying how I would feel about it if it was my wife.

Even the words you used ("do you feel like your boss' pet") bug me a little. I'm not trying to be my wife's boss. She's her own boss. I'm trying to be her partner in life. You said your husband set goals for both of yall. That's cool. I just want my wife to set them too.

Why would a couple where both people bring to the table generate more debt? It's the contrary, the household would make even more money.

If she wants to move then she moves and we can be distant for a while. Idk. Plenty solutions can be worked out together. Just like yall found solutions when your husband couldn't provide as much no more for a while.

We would both cook and clean :dahell: I can already do these by myself when I'm single, if I'm with another person it's half the job.

I feel like this issue might be cultural because this type of equal relationship is a given in many places.
My man and I were both raised in super liberal NYC. We were raised to have equal relationships. Our parents attempted equal marriages and they both failed. We didn't want to fail so we looked for a model that worked. Just like an employer, he sets the big goals and I set the mini- goals that get us there. We're saving up for a mortgage-free property. I'm able to help with that. They don't call it home economics for nothing. He's one of those focused on his career types, he prefers that I handle details. It's a good division of labor for us.

Potential employers offer me very good paying jobs. After doing the math, tho, I'd break about even, as most American two income families do. I think it's bc, 1. women cost more to keep up, 2. women 'out in the world' compete a lot with other women for very real, social reasons. Unfortunately, that doesn't often lead to conservation of resources. It leads to better bags, shoes, trips, etc.

I'm not at all trying to convince you. I'm trying to tell you that you don't have all the necessary information. The caricature of SAHW's is a bit out-dated. Modern women ain't sitting around like Peg Bundy. There's a whole sub- culture of very active women who don't work outside the home.
 

jwonder

Superstar
Joined
Aug 30, 2014
Messages
26,391
Reputation
-1,224
Daps
39,932
Reppin
DADE County
Women that want you to provide for them and get wifey treatment without bringing anything to the table other than sex or some other feminine energy bs

Some shyt like "My feminine energy natural calms you down and makes your masculine energy at peace. That's why you should make me feel provided for and secure because I give you balance :queen:"
:mjlol: I've heard that before too
I heard that dumb shyt before too.:ohhh: They must have got that ho babble from someone. I mean most women can't think from themselves, so they copy what some other broad says and beleive it.

I hit the broad with :comeon: instantly when she said that shyt. :mjlol:
 

Reality

Make your own luck.
Joined
Jun 16, 2012
Messages
7,189
Reputation
4,235
Daps
38,384
Reppin
NULL
The way a man acts when in "provide and protect" mode for a woman and children is completely different than he would otherwise naturally act. He is more stable, predictable, and controllable.

There are humongous destabilizing economic and social ramifications for a society in which men no longer feel compelled to do this.

That said, the right girl will make you want to do those things provided she's submissive, nurturing, and willing to play her role as you play yours. Most aren't really capable of doing that so it's incumbent on men to not risk taking this gamble on women who are.
 

DatBoiHawk

HAWK
Joined
Jul 11, 2015
Messages
6,096
Reputation
734
Daps
24,982
Reppin
Houston
Why don’t you just be a fakkit Op? Not saying I don’t get the premise, but as a man that’s just natural instinct. I can talk all this shyt but let a girl come around that’s fine as hell and I like her it’s jusr gonna be natural for me to wanna provide and protect
 
Top