Why Do Black Men Struggle So Much With The Dissolution Of Friendships?

[blockburna420]

Im still friends with people I met in 1999

 

[Biscayne]

OP is not making a claim in the title.
OP is requesting information in the title because issa question... specifically about black men:

This is asking for anecdotes to reach a general consensus to answer the thread title's question.

No quantitative work necessary because OP's question is qualitative.
OP asking about experiences of black men, why black men struggle with the dissolution of friendships.
It can't be quantified by race because OP is asking for anecdotes to address a qualitative question not a quantitative question.

Quantitative question: how many black men struggle with the dissolution of friendships?
And it can be quantified by race because the subject of the quantitative question is black men.
Black men would be interviewed.

I’ve seen those dynamics regardless of race or gender. Even tho this is a “black male website” not every question gets asked with a racial specific title, especially if the question affects ppl across racial lines. That’s why the title is weird. If he just asked “why do ppl grow apart” that would make more sense.

It is

nikkax will call you all types of bytch ass nikkax and make it up in their head that you are their enemy simply for not speaking to them and let’s not get into extreme cases

If white boys do that then excuse moi

What kinda friend group do you have and what kinda negros do you run with that make up scenarios in their heads to stop fukking with you? This is a black male thing?

 

[greenvale]

Some friendships are meant to end. That comes with the territory.

But, after reading the OP's thread title, I came to the conclusion that some men, Blk or not, are afraid of growing up..

Some get into their 30s, 40s & beyond still wanting to do stuff with their homies like they did in their teens & 20s.

Reach a certain age and life changes. Ppl get married, become parents, move away, etc..

Some ppl may grow apart from friends and go their own way..

Those who struggle losing friendships may be afraid to find their own way on their own. Sometimes, it may be the only way for dome men.

Facts. I'm going through this right now tbh. My friend is upset at me because I'm not hanging out as much. I'm like dog I'm in grad school, trying to get promoted and have a wife. I dont have time to be getting fukked up and hanging out with some of your friends that I dont like

 

[Diondon]

A lot of times, relationship dynamics that existed at the start of the relationship, don't evolve as the individuals do
I say that to say
I aint dealing with girlie ass shyt with no grown ass man, dawg

 

[King Poetic]

Also

All my friends have started families once we left college and u add in work and living miles apart things fall apart

I still check in once a week by phone to see how they doing, because these last 5 years or so people have been losing family members and even college friends by passing away

But trying to meet new friends at 40 isn’t it and im not part of a church

 

[Devil Plisken…CMS]

I’ve seen those dynamics regardless of race or gender. Even tho this is a “black male website” not every question gets asked with a racial specific title, especially if the question affects ppl across racial lines. That’s why the title is weird. If he just asked “why do ppl grow apart” that would make more sense.

What kinda friend group do you have and what kinda negros do you run with that make up scenarios in their heads to stop fukking with you? This is a black male thing?

I laid it out clear & yet still…

 

[WesCrook]

Need more clarity

Is this about settling a beef? Or friendships dimming over time?

 

[Commish]

Facts. I'm going through this right now tbh. My friend is upset at me because I'm not hanging out as much. I'm like dog I'm in grad school, trying to get promoted and have a wife. I dont have time to be getting fukked up and hanging out with some of your friends that I dont like

Yeah man,

I stopped hanging out with my homies a long time ago. I understood that:

-My homies prioritize spending time with women over hanging out with homies

-Parenthood, relationships/marriage obligations from homies is prioritized over hanging out.

-Some homies grow apart and may develop stronger bonds with other ppl over me.

-"I will catch you on the rebound" is to be understood, accepted and practiced @ all times!"

It is just how it goes! *shrugs*

 

[Westbama Heartthrob]

Celebrities aside I’m sure you’ve all gone through or seen weird dynamics between friends that stop being friends and bitterness grows

I've learned majority of people just live to be jealous of others. Using "friendship" as a mask for their true intentions

I hate it for anybody who doesn't have a solid family to count on. Blood or no blood. Aint too many outside of that you can count on

 

[Commish]

People generally have difficulty seeing the difference between colleagues, associates, and friends.

That is true. There is definitely levels to friendships and the onus is on ppl to know where they stand with other ppl and where ppl stand with an individual.

-stranger
-acquaintance
-colleague
-associate
-friend
-family

Also, ppl can jump levels in both directions at any given moment with different ppl.

Just how it goes..

 

[desjardins]

Men struggle with expressing emotions with each other so when shyt goes left it's easier to just cut each other off rather than talking about it the way women may do

I once went on a multiple week vacation with a friend on the other side of the world. He was taking 6 months to travel the world and I tagged along for a couple of weeks. Our time together was mostly ok but it was some tension cause I wasn't trying fukk prostitutes when he was and I didn't want to pay $500+ to fly to Singapore for a couple days. So he left without me and I went to another cheaper city near by........I ain't speak to that nikka since

 

[NaijaProdigy Redux]

This isnt a black man thing…

People just change over time / priorities morph (geographic changes, marriage, kids, career focus). It becomes harder to invest equally.

 

[cyndaquil]

Plenty of men have lifelong friendships but it requires maintenance as each life stage you go through friends becoming less and less the center of your life.
There's only so much you can put at the center of your life.
While you're in school there's more than enough space for friends so yall hangout more
Once you get into your career you see that shrink but still got some space to hangout

Once you have a career and a wife space for your friends starts to get more cramped now you can only hangout with them like a few times a month

Then once you have a career and kids and a wife or whatever women situation you got going on you barely have any time for friends so it takes extra effort to keep those friendships alive. Depending how far they are or how busy you and they are you might see some friends once a year.

So imagine during those life stages you take some of your friends may never get to the stage your at or be lagging significantly to the point you can't hang out with them anymore cuz your priorities don't match up. I know dudes who aint got no career just work at the warehouse and play video games and go out to bars looking to smash all the time probably getting cut off by the dude who is married for most shyt except playing the game. The lifestyles just don't line up anymore. Unless it's some violation type shyt people just gotta keep in touch to maintain the friendship

 

[bourgeoisie tall freak]

if you frequent the coli.com then there really is no excuse as far as "time" being the reason. cuz all this ish can easily go into a text message. i be posting the same ish on here that i post in a group chat that has been ongoing for longer than i been on here lol

 

[RickyDiBiase]

I’ve seen those dynamics regardless of race or gender. Even tho this is a “black male website” not every question gets asked with a racial specific title, especially if the question affects ppl across racial lines. That’s why the title is weird. If he just asked “why do ppl grow apart” that would make more sense.

What kinda friend group do you have and what kinda negros do you run with that make up scenarios in their heads to stop fukking with you? This is a black male thing?

These brothers got issues breh