A. Seales:I want to be with a brotha but a lot of you would rather be by yourselves. Why not commit?

[panopticon]

Kill yaself

 

[Ill-Mind]

Certain women are simply not wifeable, she may fall under this category

 

[NaijaProdigy Redux]

I’m going to be honest...you could be a great woman (attractive, caring, good family, great career, well connected, etc), and history shows I’m still going to get bored and want something new.

I really can’t give up my independence. Too many options, especially in New York.

Giving all that up has me like

 

[Drip Bayless]

Women always wanna have they cake and eat it too
Want the most attractive, most financially stable, most charismatic dude in the room, that can bag any broad
But then have the audacity to be mad that he got hoes on his jock
What the hell do you bring to the table that a mf should cut off all his hoes and put his financial future on the line by getting married?
Being cool to be around is not enough. shyt if we keeping it 1thouwow most men will still fukk around and slip and fall in some p*ssy even if his lady bringing something to the table
Look at Hov
You can settle with an average nikka or be on a ballers roster, stop tryna select options that don’t exist

 

[Eddy Gordo]

Marriage is the ultimate arrangement for stabilizing your finances. You think it’s a coincidence the group with lowest marriage rates are also the poorest?

Yes. In the 1920s we were the MOST married and still the poorest.

And how can marriage stabilize finances when HALF end in divorce and any child or property disputes from said divorce favor women? What benefit do men get out of the arrangement?

Some people just want to get the married rate for their car insurance. Use two incomes to get a house built. Open an ESA for their children's private school education. Contribute to their IRA at the married amount. Add a beneficiary to their policies that's not a parent. Start family businesses. This isn't shyt yall think about. Too scared someone will add shrimp to their Applebee's 2 for $20 entree.

You listed a bunch of nonsense that a single man (with no kids) could do on his own or doesn't give a shyt about.

 

[Rawtid]

I'm gonna stop you here for a second...

Are we really?

Like Amanda was saying, I think there is a growing contingent of people who "want to be by themselves"
and have "a semblance of independence" - and therefore, are not "looking" for mates.

I will venture to say I am one of those people.

If you keep it all the way real, I think you would say you are one.

I dont want to be by myself. I think it’s just hard to find someone on the same page at the same time. For whatever reason. It can become such a game trying to figure out how much of your precious time you have left to play with these people. Then you also may need someone to hand you a roll of toilet paper when you’re 70 and left the new pack in the dining room. I like people, just not all of them.

 

[EndDomination]

I feel like she's talking to me, at this point I'm so comfortable with my lifestyle that its hard to make time for someone else

Nah nikkas getting married literally everyday.

She just cant keep a man

just a cop-out/excuse they use

Embrace feminism and then complain when it ends in disaster brehettes

We've got threads everyday with brehs talking about relationships and not committing.
Yet every single time it is brought up, brehs cop excuses.
The cognitive dissonance is apparent, and not surprising.

 

[Youseenmywork]

We no going to have this conversation. This conversation is in the locker room once every two weeks. Marriage anit what it used to be. Throw in the laws are never in a mans favor when a women wants to divorce you. Even the OG rom wills said “If a man asked me to sell him on marriage... I couldn’t women don’t make easy”. When the OGs is telling you not get married ....well. I could go on but I’m not trying to get that deep with cause I can.

 

[EndDomination]

can we go a day, or a month or so, without blaming black men for something for fukk sake

Considering this is specifically about Black men, and dating, and Black men talk about their reservations with committment both online, in public and in media, and the onus in the Western world, from Los Angeles to Lagos is on the man to take the affirmative step in the relationship, its not really "blaming Black men" as much as it is acknowledging reality.

Why are you crying about it? Are you married and feel you're not a part of the discussion or something?

 

[EndDomination]

Men will commit to something worth commiting to. Men do the picking. If you're not worth the draft pick we're not using it on you plain and simple.

Some women think they should be the #1 pick but not even being looked at by the JBA.

nikkas break commitments to every kind of woman, worthy or not. Either you don't know men or you don't know women.
I know plenty of throwaway thots in long-term relationships or married, and I know plenty of righteous women who are sitting on the sidelines waiting.
There's a mass disconnect as well when it comes to viable numbers between Black women and Black men that needs to be taken into account.

Stop frontin.

 

[Eddy Gordo]

nikkas break commitments to every kind of woman, worthy or not. Even you don't know men or you don't know women.
I know plenty of throwaway thots in long-term relationships or married, and I know plenty of righteous women who are sitting on the sidelines waiting.
There's a mass disconnect as well when it comes to viable numbers between Black women and Black men that needs to be taken into account.

Stop frontin.

What does this mean?

 

[Youseenmywork]

Now when black men say this that they have to date out to find a wife y’all get in a uproar. I don’t do gender war shyt but a lot of you sistas are not wifey material. It’s the cold hard truth. That’s just facts. Ask ya self this why so many professional black men marry out? Oh wait let me guess colorism? So many of y’all go to the club every weekend well in to your 30s cry on Ig or FB why you can’t get a good man.

I’m take it further the sad part is it’s actually men out her that want a family and the whole 9 but those are the men they don’t want. Those same brothas are watching the choices women are making and they mad ass hell on the low....women don’t have the best choices when it comes to men.


EDIT: I have a theory that the men that get a ton of women usually alpha males and the women they do get are Conspiring aginst the men that aren’t as good or who may not get as many women ...it was just a thought I had yesterday.

 

[El negrito de tejas]

Transitioning into my 30's I've realized that most women I've dealt with show why you shouldn't commit to them rather than why you should. And this isn't just black women either this includes some white & Hispanic women I've dealt with.
We ain't even together and you're causing me all types of frustration & annoyance. Now why would i want to make the jump to commitment and find out how you treat your boyfriend's if this is how you treat somebody you're dating?

The last woman I took serious made it a mission to make my life easier. She made a concious effort to do things that I didn't have to ask and went above and beyond that had me like, "damn women Ive committed to never treated me like this before..." I immediately wanted to lock her down no question.
Because I couldn't stand the idea of that woman being with another man and treating him the way she treated me.

 

[Taadow]

I dont want to be by myself. I think it’s just hard to find someone on the same page at the same time. For whatever reason.

Which is why it may be better to be by yourself.

It can become such a game trying to figure out how much of your precious time you have left to play with these people.

It could also not be a game you wish to play.

Then you also may need someone to hand you a roll of toilet paper when you’re 70 and left the new pack in the dining room. I like people, just not all of them.

Or you could not need that.

You can like people without wanting to be their mate.

 

[Astroslik]

I’m going to be honest...you could be a great woman (attractive, caring, good family, great career, well connected, etc), and history shows I’m still going to get bored and want something new.

I really can’t give up my independence. Too many options, especially in New York.

Giving all that up has me like

I couldn't even imagine cuffing a chick if I was a breh in IB