Cold approaching women: the right mindset and some advice

[Balla]

Cold approach is approaching a girl you don't know, doesn't matter if it's at a bar or not.

But the other kind of day approaching which is harder to do.

Where do u usually go 2-3 times a week?

Do you go to the same spots in the week?

Do you go to the same spots every week?

I'm trying to go to new spots often, but won't lie because I go dolo I feel more comfortable in some places I've frequented a lot before.

For me cold approaches are everyday street approaches. I used to do them regularly but have been stuck in a routine and it has been non-existent as of late.
If cold approaches also includes bars/clubs/social events than I am averaging maybe 3 per night and +7 if I am feeling it.

I go out about 2-3x per week.

 

[Macallik86]

Cold approach is approaching a girl you don't know, doesn't matter if it's at a bar or not.

But the other kind of day approaching which is harder to do.

Where do u usually go 2-3 times a week?

Do you go to the same spots in the week?

Do you go to the same spots every week?

I'm trying to go to new spots often, but won't lie because I go dolo I feel more comfortable in some places I've frequented a lot before.

Up until the last two months, I was attending the same venues over and over. I am trying to branch out to mix things up a bit and so that I am not running into the same type of girls over and over. I'd say right now, I go to the same spot about once a month and rotate to new spots weekly. I usually club or do day parties when the weather is nice but I have started branching out into the brunch crowd which is more receptive than the clubbing crowd and usually higher quality in terms of compatibility with me.

 

[The Message]

i work right across the street from the mall, so i headed over there at lunch to walk around and clear my head.

i opened the first chick i saw as soon as i got in the mall. blonde chick with gray eyes wearing pink yoga pants. i stepped to her and said i loved her look and she smiled, said thanks and was turning away to leave. i said, 'hold up for two seconds' and she stopped again. i asked her who she was, and she said she had to go. twenty minutes later i saw her with her boyfriend . so, i would say 70% of the time, when they say they have a boyfriend, theyre telling the truth.

so, after being a fakkit a bunch of times, by not stopping at least 4 breezies that i walked right past, i told myself the next chick i saw, i HAD to fukkin approach. i finally saw one worthwhile and i had 15 minutes left before i had to get back to work

thick thighs, big titties with a slim stomach. she had on a biker jacket, a low cut tank on with the skinny ripped black jeans that hugged her hips. chick was RIGHT

i stopped her, told her i thought she was cute as fukk. her eyes widened like a deer in the headlights. it was like no one had ever came up to her and complimented her in her life. probably because thats exactly the case

i flirted heavy, teased her a bit and just got to know her. towards the end of our convo, she shyt-tested me and asked if i go up to girls all the time. i held that direct eye contact and said, "every day of the week". she laughed. and i said, "but only to the brunettes with hazel eyes" which describes her exactly. she blushed hard as fukk and i knew had her wrapped up.

we exchanged numbers. i did most of the talking in this one. that happens at times but you cant write it off as her not being interested. maybe she thought i was the flyest nikka on earth and was super nervous. or nervous because shes waiting for me to get lame or weird. but who cares. if the bytch is still standing there and hasnt walked away...shes usually interested.

NO ONE goes up to a broad and spits anymore. most dudes see a chick, break their necks and say damn and go home and jack off to the memory of her. lol

if i had time, i wouldve asked her to grab coffee or a smoothie, then to a bar for drinks, then back to my crib.

yes nikkas...that shyt is possible. try it next time...if you have the time. dont go just for the number, ask her to grab coffee, then baby step the shyt back to your spot.

 

[Balla]

Brunch crowd? Like at restaurants? I'm trying to imagine it. What kind of places like these are similar to clubs?

Up until the last two months, I was attending the same venues over and over. I am trying to branch out to mix things up a bit and so that I am not running into the same type of girls over and over. I'd say right now, I go to the same spot about once a month and rotate to new spots weekly. I usually club or do day parties when the weather is nice but I have started branching out into the brunch crowd which is more receptive than the clubbing crowd and usually higher quality in terms of compatibility with me.

 

[Serious]

I don't think 27 is old at all, but it's just being that seeing all these younger girls in their late teens and early 20s in abundance makes me feel weird.

And I'm trying to do this for a while because it's been a while since I wanted to do this.


Do u usually cold approach during the day?

You approach when you find a woman attractive period. Try to read body language though. A lot of shyt is situational so you have to improvise on your approach. It's not as hard as people think but practice makes perfect.

What helps that I always have a ton ice breakers on hand to break the tension.

For example mentioning something to effect of the weather or traffic usually works.

The best way to the close deal is to be direct about asking for a number and hanging out.

I'll admit, I have a cheat code, because I'm fairly good looking and I can usually tell when a woman finds me attractive so I act on it. But all less attractive cats need to do is focus on being well groomed and smelling good.

 

[Serious]

Yeah, but the problem is getting too used to rejections and becoming a robot. shyt, it happened to me. For a long time I only felt excitement when I approached very attractive women. Still, it can happen for a lot of reasons. A lot of guys never know why they fukk up their approaches, or are too proud for adaptation.
You can only reach the apex by climbing a mountain of rejections.

I mean I'm not of mindset of getting used to rejection. Thats some internal loser shyt, when I get rejected, I look at as an opportunity to grow and humble myself make sure the error doesn't reoccur.

But like I said rejection is part of the game, so you cant take it too personal.

 

[BobbyBooshay]

So before I give my thoughts for today, Ill say something regarding the future of this thread:

Im gonna post little thinkpieces about aspects regarding this topic that I come across/think of & of course also stuff y‘all think about regarding this whole thing. Im also gonna share „field reports“ (I dont wanna get put into the whole „pick-up“ thing too much but thats the most accurate name for it in my opinion) but those are the most time consuming parts to write down & im a lazy & flabby poster but ill give my best .
From time to time I think im gonna edit the opening post and structure my thoughts into different aspects (as soon as I figure out how to split it best).

But anyway....



The point to get started:

I‘ll start off the new year in this thread posting wise with the most obvious, simple but also the maybe most important step of this whole ordeal: Actually getting started. More specifically getting started & continuing to do it.

In my opinion when it comes to this topic, a man can only take so much. If you dont have the women you want/any women in your life and you cant actually get them to come into your life it takes a toll on your wellbeing. I know this from first hand experience. You can ignore it for a while. You can find little excuses here & there. You will tell yourself stuff like „Its such a busy time in my life right now, no wonder theres nothing going on with women. Well, after that time is over Im sure the problem is gonna handle itself.“ Or „Im just never seeing the „one“ or the „right women“, thats not my fault“. Or „Ill take care of all the other stuff in my lfe first, and afterwards women wont be a problem anymore and Ill really start being successful there as well“

This is Bullshyt. Its the same with people who complain about not going to the gym because they seemingly cant even spare as little as 30-60 minutes a day to do something for themselves but got PLENTY of time to sit on the couch, watch netflix & Watch life pass them by EVERY SINGLE DAY.

But in my experience when it comes to the part with women or more accurately the lack of said women in your life you will reach a boiling point. Some sooner, some later. Its the point where the thoughts of „I shouldve said something to this beautiful lady in the grocery store, why didnt I do anything ?!?!“
or „I wonder if the girl I seen on the bus stop wouldve maybe also been interested in me“ become unbearable. You feel powerless. Like a p*ssy. You look at yourself in disgust, wondering why the fukk something as seemingly simple as talking to a Woman you dont know yet makes you so scared. You question yourself, your character, your courage. You cant understand why you are seemingly stuck in your situation, standing in front of a giant wall you cant seem to overcome. Thats where your journey into a better self has to begin. You have to hate yourself and your current situation before you make that move and change it. Because you will realize that not doing it and continuing to hate yourself more & morr with each missed chance & opportunity is infinitely worse than anything that could ever happen if you tried & failed a couple times.




@neotheflyingone
@Dreamzeedream
@GrindMode
@LiveFromLondon
@Rose Gold
@G.O.A.T Squad Spokesman

 

[Macallik86]

Brunch crowd? Like at restaurants? I'm trying to imagine it. What kind of places like these are similar to clubs?

Yes. Find a spot that has bottomless mimosas and a DJ spinning and you're set.

• Mimosas (and brunch in general) are seen as 'girly' so it is usually a bunch of tipsy women while most of the men there are with their girlfriend. It is the opposite of the nightlife experience. Also, (in my experiences) the girls that frequent brunch are less likely to be meeting guys 24/7 so they aren't as jaded or standoffish.
• Having a DJ spinning music is good (for me at least) because it gives a chance to holler at women without feeling like you're interrupting.
• In my experience, the women who go to brunch tend to be more professional and can't afford to be out until 3am so they get it in during the day time and are in bed by 10pm

 

[BobbyBooshay]

Dude from Alpha Male Strategies is hilarious but spitting so much knowledge

 

[1-8-7-Skillz]

6 approaches, will edit the details into this post asap, currently otr

What about y‘all


@neotheflyingone
@Dreamzeedream
@GrindMode
@LiveFromLondon
@Rose Gold
@G.O.A.T Squad Spokesman

 

[1-8-7-Skillz]

Goddamnit, this week been hell

But tomorrow this fukking thread is finally taking off as it should be swear to god !

What y‘all been doing in the meanwhile ?


@neotheflyingone
@Dreamzeedream
@GrindMode
@LiveFromLondon
@Rose Gold
@G.O.A.T Squad Spokesman

 

[Neo. The Only. The One.]

 

[1-8-7-Skillz]

So one of the things thats been on my mind for a while now and that may offer y‘all a glimpse into my mindset & how it affects me is to share my opinion on some „hot topics“ like „incels“, „slut shaming“ „bytches aint shyt“ etc etc. Im sorry in advance if this post turns out to be a bit unorganized but I‘ll try my best to structure it into various aspects & questions.

The first one for today will be about the perception of women


The one thing all the following aspects will boil down to, is the fact that the communication between men & women, their attitude towards each other & the dynamics between them seem to be off in a lot of ways.


First of all I think people not being able to approach other people (in this specific thread its approaching women but its basically all human interactions) is responsible for a lot of misunderstandings between them. I often see this with men who had a couple of women in their life they met through mutual friends, in school or at a party, basically women they just somehow „ended up with“. Now the majority of those women resulted in a „bad experience“, they didnt really connect with each other & resulting in a rather superficial „relationship“, they got cheated on or somehow else made negative experiences. Now they base their whole perception of the concept „women“ on those experiences they had. They start having mindsets like „I knew it, women are the devil, fukk them!“ , „You cant trust a bytch“, „They are all hoes“ and so on.


What those people fail to realize is that they never actually take the DAILY opportunity to meet a big number of women (and people in general if you want to take this whole thought outside of this specific topic), women that can be totally different from those they owe their negative thoughts & prejudice from the past to. But by never actually stepping outside of their comfort zone, allowing themselves to gain new experiences and outlook on things they stay stuck in their thinking, become miserable & just see the world in black & white.


Another thing thats further polluting those peoples minds is that social media & the internet in general just hits them with new negative horror stories regarding women, „sluts“, „bytches“ & „hoes“ nonstop so they develop an absolutely distorted, bleak sense of reality where everything is bad, the world is evil & of course everyone is against you.


Its the same with those incels that develop an absolutely dumb thinking about women. They havent worked on their ability to interact with people and also never really learned it, so they cant even change their thinking & perception with actual real life examples until they finally choose to change something about their lifes. They dont have the natural understanding that women are also just regular human beings you should interact with. Its something humans should absolutely do but a good number of people doesnt seem to get that and instead have unrealistic & problematic views. For those guys women are on an unreachable pedestral, which creates frustration, anger & hatred towards them, whch results in pathetic movements like those extreme MGTOW idiots. Thats how those people are also stuck in their own mental hell.


Thats it for now.
Next thing I‘ll touch on is slut shaming.


@neotheflyingone
@Dreamzeedream
@GrindMode
@LiveFromLondon
@Rose Gold
@G.O.A.T Squad Spokesman

 

[1-8-7-Skillz]

Field report tomorrow, the lil thinkpiece about this whole slut shaming thing sunday

 

[1-8-7-Skillz]

So only approached one girl today, been working on my shyt today and only got out the house around the corner to get some groceries. There was a super cute woman working on some food stand in the market. Went straight up to her, told her she caught my eye and just introduced myself to her. Shes in a relationship and rejected me but we still had a good conversation, she was super happy to be approached and also stated how rare it is that someone actually has the balls and just comes up to her with a direct approach. Also told me how that should be much more common than it is, and thats 100% how I think as well.

Thats something thats really common in a majority of all the girls I approached, no matter if I bagged her or got rejected, almost every woman out there stated how good it is if men actually approach women with some game & balls, instead of staring at them and being scared to make a move.

Another thing she said that really makes me @ some other dudes is the fact that the worst that can happen is a „no“, and thats a friendly & cool „no“ most of the times. Like im legit @ some imaginary horrorstories that are going on in peoples heads. Some of them dudes really think that women will all laugh at you, act offended or straight up shoot you with a pistol if you approach

I NEVER ever had some really negative responses like that, and I cant imagine them actually happening unless people are out there straight up harassing women..