Everybody Winning On The Coli, But Come Post Some L’s

[Max.]

My first house alone...crack heads were stealing power from my house...reported that shyt to my landlord .they got kicked out 2 days later my house got robbed for my tv...and all my jordans (mind u i wear size 13).. got fired a month later cacs fired everybody that was black basically..


Took a female out...for "drinks" spent like $25...bytch was fatter than in person...i wanted to bounce so bad but i stayed...

I said aight lets bounce to grab some food (dennys n this bytch says...lets get sushi (never tried it)

Bill came out to like $70 and this bytch was mad annoying

 

[Max.]

Got a DM late nite from a latina bytch i met before...was very flirty but sumthn seemed off...so before i left i wrote the girls name n the apartments im going too (in case sumthn happens) on paper n left it on my bed...

I get to the apts 3 gates...but only 1 way in n one way out....


As soon as i pull in i see a dude in hoodie duck down...i knew it was a set up(her ex bf had her PW)

I did some fast n furious shyt n pointed my car to drive out n a car (with its lights turned off) drives up to the exit...

So i have a 3 second window of do i run this dude over n tbone this fukkn car(and most likely do 10 years in prison) or figure sumthn out...so i drove thru the apts heary beating....than i thought im stuck in here...so i park my car and lean up against a wall like i live there...5 mins goes by...these dudes arent chasing me...i got a text sayn "ay nikka its only 1 way out of here blah blah"....so this couple walkn into there place walks by i tell them whats going on but they seem suspicous of me...so they asked me to wait outside...

I felt like tony montana when he went to the motel...so i call 911 n say that theres a body layn on the ground in front of the apts entrance...5 mins later sirens coming...i see the dudes running thru the apts...and i get in my car n drive away...

Dude texts me sayn why i call cops...he just wanted to fight (with a car full of dudes)

 

[SuaveyBoi115]

This girl in my junior year of high school asked me for my number and I said I didn’t have a phone even though I just got done using it





To make things worse she looked even better the following year

 

[Bumblebreh]

#uglygang and#Teamfatman take a loss everytime we look in the mirror,step on a scale or leave the house. Also I lose multiple lotteries every week.













But the day I win the lottery will be a generational wealth size win.

Due to my flabbyness i can only wear throwback fits and the ladies are not diggin it brehs

 

[Denzel_Saucegton]

Sold a nikka I met at the club a pound of weed years ago. Went to the store with one of the hundreds and they was like we can’t take this shyt, it’s counterfeit. I convinced the nikka at the store to sell me one of they pens, went and checked the rest of the money and only $100 of it was real. Called that nikka and he never answered. Never saw him again. Finessed

 

[Supercoolmayo]

@General Mills

I hope your kids don't inherit your L gene

 

[General Mills]

I took a mean L a few weeks back.

I'd been up 24 hours as I couldn't sleep the night before work, and I got off and this girl hit me up online. We start talking and she eventually tells me that she's stuck at the Greyhound bus station. Her trip had been cancelled. It was cold as fukk in FL that night -- 23 degrees, which is arctic here. She says that she'll keep me "warm" if I come get her. Right there, I should've had her clarify how she intended to do that.

I was tired and cold as fukk. I went and got her. She said she was hungry so I bought her something from Checker's on the way home. I'm a kind host on some Xerxes shyt . We get in the bed and get settled and she snuggles up under me. After awhile, I try to put her hand on my joint in a very natural and organic motion. She hits me with an audible . I don't even think I slept that night . We turned our backs to each other and she had to be at the station at like 5:30 am. SMFH.

I dropped her off and she goes, "thanks." When I got home she texted me and was talking about what kinda female did I think she was? And she felt so disrespected and that she was so uncomfortable and almost asked me to take her back to the bus station. I'm just like....











"My period was on anyways ."


And then she blocked me . I basically deprived myself of sleep, froze, feed, and housed an old Leon Lett circa 1995 built ass broad for no real reason.


Playas fukk up too.

 

[Kimo_bud]

I'm on vacation and had 1000$ in cash. I can't find it and going to leave tomorrow. I hope it's in one of the suitcases or else some nikka partying wit my dough

 

[KingsOfKings]

Subs

Once got finessed with a fake 20 for dub many years ago. Never seen dude again.

Spoiler

I spoke on this in jbo and some say it wasn't a l but. One of my fwb who I hadn't spoken to in some years was in my area and I'm trying to bone something. Its been a while since I hit. So she comes up with a lie of having to bike across town. Gave the chick like 20 for a uber. Beforehand. Got top off a couple of times. Im told she use the 20 for weed, had a p, etc.

 

[klutch2381]

where were you in fla where it hit 23 degrees? i need to know so i stay away from there. gotta be the panhandle area jax doesnt get that cold.

Tallahassee. It snowed here awhile back.

 

[acri1]

Got a DM late nite from a latina bytch i met before...was very flirty but sumthn seemed off...so before i left i wrote the girls name n the apartments im going too (in case sumthn happens) on paper n left it on my bed...

I get to the apts 3 gates...but only 1 way in n one way out....


As soon as i pull in i see a dude in hoodie duck down...i knew it was a set up(her ex bf had her PW)

I did some fast n furious shyt n pointed my car to drive out n a car (with its lights turned off) drives up to the exit...

So i have a 3 second window of do i run this dude over n tbone this fukkn car(and most likely do 10 years in prison) or figure sumthn out...so i drove thru the apts heary beating....than i thought im stuck in here...so i park my car and lean up against a wall like i live there...5 mins goes by...these dudes arent chasing me...i got a text sayn "ay nikka its only 1 way out of here blah blah"....so this couple walkn into there place walks by i tell them whats going on but they seem suspicous of me...so they asked me to wait outside...

I felt like tony montana when he went to the motel...so i call 911 n say that theres a body layn on the ground in front of the apts entrance...5 mins later sirens coming...i see the dudes running thru the apts...and i get in my car n drive away...

Dude texts me sayn why i call cops...he just wanted to fight (with a car full of dudes)

Honestly this isn't really that much of an L.

You managed to avoid getting jumped and/or catching a case. .

 

[patscorpio]

friends had a hotel room in Soho, but i decided to sleep in my car instead because i wanted "fresh air".

fell asleep in my car, forgot to take key out of the ignition after i opened the sunroof, passed out. didnt realize my boy left an empty beer can in passenger seat.

DUI.

 

[Pazzy]

used to it already that it's just to me. I'm surprised if things turn out better than expected or okay.

 

[Buckeye Fever]

My job normally has different food trucks come every other friday for lunch.

I had been noticed this bad ass chick who i think works on the 4th floor. Lil bish is a strong 8 with a nice lil bubble in the back. I work on the 3rd floor so I dont even see her alot.


Well last friday I am in the parking lot trying to decide which truck i want to get grub from. I decide on the one serving chicken n waffles.


Who gets in line behind me? Super 8

She chats me up. Asking what im ordering. We get to chit chatting while waiting for our grub. Super 8 is mad chill and i just so happened to have a fresh taper and line up after 7 weeks of wolfin. Waves are on god mode.


We walk into the building together and she says lets take the stairs. We are going to need to burn some calories before eating all this grub.


We are slow walking up the steps side by side still conversating. We hit the 2nd floor and i am sneaking another peek at Super 8's rump when i misjudged the step...


nikkas i fell going UP the steps... When my foot skipped off the step I went OohhhhhHHHHHHoooOooooo!!!! But for some reason it came out mad feminine.

I had my food in one hand and Im teeter tottering and my equilibrium was off like a mother fukker.. I flung my free hand out to grab something to help me out because all I could see in my mind is those concrete steps rushing up to smack me in the grill.


I grab the closest thing nearest to me to stabilize myself. Super 8

I grasped her sleeve and that shyt tore off like some nba tearaway pants.


Now my whole balance is beyond repair.. I hit the damn steps hard as fukk and slid down them motherfukkers. I watched my chicken n waffles tumble once...twice. then bust open all over the landing



Then i noticed it was raining chicken n waffles...but it was not mine


It was Super 8's. When i tried to grab for her and tore her sleeve she lost balance too but she almost corrected the L... But then lost balance too and her food went up in the air and rained down on me a split second before she busted her ass down the steps too.



It was carnage brehs. Chicken. waffles. syrup. she looked at me like

In my mind, I hear pieces of chicken hittin' the ground

It wouldn't be as bad, but damn, syrup too?

 

[General Mills]

In my mind, I hear pieces of chicken hittin' the ground

It wouldn't be as bad, but damn, syrup too?

Breh that chicken was fried to perfection too. The syrup had hot sauce infused in it. I... I am still sick about it