Female Friends and Bounderies...

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

Why to some of ya'll let your female friends run wild?

I swear there is nothing more unattractive than a man with a female friend that doesn't know her place.

Went to a dinner party last night and saw one chick sabotage 3 dudes in one swoop.

The first she totally ruined dude's chance at getting a chick who was interested by being affectionate with him and then turns around to say she wouldn't be interested in a guy if she were in the other woman's shoes. lol

Then she cocked blocked another chick from a dude she didn't want or know because she doesn't like the girl.

Then she tried to "help" another guy out by trying to pull me for him which of course didn't go over well because the guy never asked her to do that and because we're not in junior high. shyt was so awkward and she was aggressive too. lol

On one hand I kinda wanna say something to the last guy about reigning her in. But on the other hand the fukkery was pretty entertaining to watch and the engagement would be rather dull without it.

It's not uncommon to meet guys with pushy or overly involved female friends. IDK why some of ya'll allow that. It's dating suicide.

 

[number21]

Never saw the point of having a female friend.

 

[Kenny West]

Never had one like that...most of the time they're just sorta...there.


Sure that wasnt someone's sister?

 

[Kokoro]

Naw women in general are just habitual line steppers.

They will take a mile if you don’t check them.

 

[42 Monks]

those ain't friends

 

[Donny]

This happened to me when I was deep in mid conversation with a girl I been trying to get at like dope one on one conversation. My homegirl saw me and interjected herself in there just sitting next to us all awkwardly till shawty left I was heartbroken. Should’ve told my homegirl I’d get up with her in a second in hindsight. Actually ended up dating my homegirl a couple months later.

Having female friends isn’t as complicated as people make it seem I grew up with my sister who was like my best friend growing up. Just gotta know where to draw that line and make sure they’re not on some weird shyt that’s gonna cause all kind’ve extra problems might have to fall back from one another when you get in a relationship though

 

[NotAnFBIagent]

That just sounds like a trash female friend. Some can be cool

 

[Commish]

OPette..

I believe that your scenario was an exception to the rule because most platonic relationships between men and women have boundaries. I would also claim that most of said boundaries are initiated, executed and maintained by women. Basically, women control or at least have the final say so on whether a platonic relationship can become romantic or not.

As for your situation that you shared, what can a dude do in that situation besides pulling ol girl to the side and checking her? If checking her is the answer, then I will tell you that a lot of dudes aren’t going to do it. But, there are some to many men that would check her.

That women knows who to pull that bullshyt behavior off on, but to be quite frank, I don’t think those other women you have mentioned in your situation is any better that the woman in question. They going to punish these men because they didn’t check this particular crazy broad? That ain’t shyt either, IMO!!

Perhaps, there is a reason why I may not place high value platonic relationships between myself and women. I just don’t believe many of these so called relationships are genuine.

 

[Double Burger With Cheese]

Female friend shyt is an oxymoron. I’m trying to fukk damn near any women in my phone that’s not family or business related. Either I have already, or will when the opportunity presents itself. Ain’t none of that hanging out shyt with my homegirl. I had to dead that shyt long ago. Ain’t shyt in it for a nikka. The most I will do is go have a drink with female coworkers, but even them hoes know what’s up cause I demand them hoes put me on the homies. You just gotta let these hoes know what you about OFF TOP

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

Never had one like that...most of the time they're just sorta...there.


Sure that wasnt someone's sister?

Nope wasn't anyone's sister. She has known the first 2 guys for 20 years.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

Naw women in general are just habitual line steppers.

They will take a mile if you don’t check them.

:funny:

I want to disagree with you but...I won't. Everyone need boundaries.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

This happened to me when I was deep in mid conversation with a girl I been trying to get at like dope one on one conversation. My homegirl saw me and interjected herself in there just sitting next to us all awkwardly till shawty left I was heartbroken. Should’ve told my homegirl I’d get up with her in a second in hindsight. Actually ended up dating my homegirl a couple months later.

Having female friends isn’t as complicated as people make it seem I grew up with my sister who was like my best friend growing up. Just gotta know where to draw that line and make sure they’re not on some weird shyt that’s gonna cause all kind’ve extra problems might have to fall back from one another when you get in a relationship though

So your homegirl basically cock block to get you for herself. Smooth criminal...

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

That just sounds like a trash female friend. Some can be cool

Of course they can be. I am talking about the ones men let do whatever and ruin their dating prospects.

OPette..

I believe that your scenario was an exception to the rule because most platonic relationships between men and women have boundaries. I would also claim that most of said boundaries are initiated, executed and maintained by women. Basically, women control or at least have the final say so on whether a platonic relationship can become romantic or not.

As for your situation that you shared, what can a dude do in that situation besides pulling ol girl to the side and checking her? If checking her is the answer, then I will tell you that a lot of dudes aren’t going to do it. But, there are some to many men that would check her.

That women knows who to pull that bullshyt behavior off on, but to be quite frank, I don’t think those other women you have mentioned in your situation is any better that the woman in question. They going to punish these men because they didn’t check this particular crazy broad? That ain’t shyt either, IMO!!

Perhaps, there is a reason why I may not place high value platonic relationships between myself and women. I just don’t believe many of these so called relationships are genuine.

This post is kinda all over the place but let's go with it.

First, I never said it was every situation. This isn't an all or nothing conversation. But this is not uncommon. I have seen it plenty times before. And the reason it happens is because of the reason you stated in the 3rd paragraph which also leads me to address your statement in the 4th.

Why would a woman want to be with a man who refuses or doesn't require females to be respectful? Why would that be an attractive quality to another woman?

Would you be with a woman who allowed her male friends to be affectionate with her while with or pursuing you? Who you want a woman who allows her male friends to but in on her relationships? I doubt you would. It's the same thought process.

 

[Berry]

She seem like the type that only has guy friends, girls like that like the attention and will be wary of anything that can come between that.

I have a good mix of guy and girl friends and we don’t have those problems at all.

 

[Commish]

Of course they can be. I am talking about the ones men let do whatever and ruin their dating prospects.



This post is kinda all over the place but let's go with it.

First, I never said it was every situation. This isn't an all or nothing conversation. But this is not uncommon. I have seen it plenty times before. And the reason it happens is because of the reason you stated in the 3rd paragraph which also leads me to address your statement in the 4th.

Why would a woman want to be with a man who refuses or doesn't require females to be respectful? Why would that be an attractive quality to another woman?

Would you be with a woman who allowed her male friends to be affectionate with her while with or pursuing you? Who you want a woman who allows her male friends to but in on her relationships? I doubt you would. It's the same thought process.

First , before at address your questions, I wasn’t referring to you specifically when I said those women weren’t shyt. Just wanted state that before I proceed..

To your first question, I don’t think a man should police nor should he be held responsible as an arbitrator for the actions of another person, male or female. That isn’t his responsibility. The responsibility of good behavior lies in each person.

Next, I can agree that a man or woman should exercise their option to disassociate themselves with people who behave in a disrespectful manner, but truth be told, sometimes one may not be in a mood to get into a potential confrontation with a woman in public, not to mention, it could be a damned if you do damned if you don’t situation for the man.

A man can check a woman friend for acting a fool in front of a pursued woman and still turn off the pursued woman, if said woman feels that the man isn’t checking the disrespectful “friend” properly. So, either way, he is assed out and to be real, the pursued woman who was turned off wasn’t really interested in the pursuing man to boot because she could have simply held the fool acting friend accountable for her foolish behavior and still talk to the man who is interested in her.

As for how a man responds to conflict being attractive attribute or not, I will say that I don’t have an issue with you being turned off, but I don’t think it should be universal for all women. But, if I had to choose, I would prefer if a woman simply looked at things a lil more objectively and not be so punitive towards men. Confronting women who you said was displaying aggressive behavior can really go bad for himself, the woman and witnesses.

Regarding your other question, if I am pursuing a woman who invited me to a social event where her male friend(s) were also in attendance and one of those men were overly affectionate towards her and she was reciprocating the gesture, then I would assume they are fukking each other and would leave her alone. If any of her male friends were being affectionate toward her and she seems uncomfortable with it, then I may pull dude to the side and speak to him about it or pull her to the side and ask her if she is ok and suggest going somewhere else. I would have to assess the situation and based on the situation, act accordingly.

So, this is what it comes down to with me. I don’t have any close female friends. At best, I have one female friend who I keep in touch with via social media every now and then, but I don’t have any female friends that I can call a true homie like my male friends. Most women I know outside of family are work associates or women I may have known from the past who happens to be on one of my social media friends lists.

But, I get your point, you want dudes to check women who get out of pocket. In some situations, I would agree with you, but in other situations, I would side with caution doing such, especially these days. I would honestly tell dudes to stop being platonic friends with women and only deal with women who are romantically interested in them.