After 40 and still single?
What's wrong?
Is It Worth It To Still Try To Date/Find Love After 40?
- Thread starter DatLBCGuy562
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What's wrong?
DatLBCGuy562
Superstar
Damn. Sorry for your loss breh. That’s the worst.
DatLBCGuy562
Superstar
A man can only hope to be so fortunate...After 40 and still single?
Sorry for your loss.
An older guy was mentioning this the other day. He's in his mid 40s but he looks like he's in his early 30s, like 31. He doeesnt' tell his age or his marital status because he doesnt' want the headache and wants to given breathing room.
...or should you just call it a life and be single for the duration of your life? I'm 2 months away from the big Four-Oh
And all 40 year old women, or women 35 and up to be general, just seem to have mad kids, mad attitude, and mad baggage. When I start talking to them and start dealing with their BS, I immediately long for, and go back to, the peace and simplicity of my solitude and bachelor's life
Fellow old headsspeak on it. Have you found success in the dating game as you enter middle age, or have you reveled in your singlehood and found other things besides women to occupy your time? Youngstas chime in. Is there a certain cutoff point for you to stop pursuing love, or will you search until the end of your days?
@DatLBCGuy562 how have things been going relationship wise since you made this thread?
@africngiant
@WIA20XX
@Ohene
@VertigoKnight
What are you all thoughts on this?
Its tough To be honest
I’m 32 in September and while there are so many attractive and even cool women, i have had trouble finding a woman with whom i can build a relationship/family with. The mentalities often ain’t aligned with how i see things, which is fine. However, they aren’t malleable enough to meet in the middle and successfully reach that equilibrium. You realize after time why they not worth wifing
I’m at a point where i still value the “idea” Of having a long term partner but I’m not sure if it will happen and I’m not sure it’s worth it.
It seems like a bit of a lose lose in the long run either way when it comes to being single vs in a relationship . But being single and or dating without those obligations is definitely more peaceful and easier than living with a partner and being married.
Think of all the relationships you had with your exes. Outside of MAYBE p*ssy and cooked meals what do you miss about them? This is the question most men need to ask themselves. Perhaps the answer is so intangible that it is inexplicable. Perhaps we are going for or meeting the wrong women. I believe in samples though…at some point you have to see women for what they are and put the idealism to the side
I'm gonna be 39 in a couple of months I'm already giving up on the idea of getting married or even having a GF. It would of happened by now...
I just don't think I'm built to be in relationship.
my longest relationship with a woman lasted 6 months and that was more of fling than anything. And that was almost 15 years ago.
The game is rigged and the best way to play the game is to not play at all.
I just don't think I'm built to be in relationship.
my longest relationship with a woman lasted 6 months and that was more of fling than anything. And that was almost 15 years ago.
The game is rigged and the best way to play the game is to not play at all.
africngiant
All Star
due to the current dating landscape, if things continue to regress, i wouldn’t be against waiting until around 40 to get married. you still got a lot of time breh
ive seen my previously divorced uncle move towards another serious relationship before breaking it off at 57 years old, so i know it’s possible.
The TL DR - if you're in shape, teeth look good, no gut, dress well enough, got your paper right, got a spot, got a car, baby mama and kids are well handled - you'll eat.
You can eat off of dating apps, if you're going "age appropriate".
You can grab these young chicks if you go to the right social events.
Generally, my observations.
On the female side, they always bring problems
18-22 - No R. Kelly, but these chicks are exhausting to even be around
23-26 - The idea age for a chick to get married, but you gotta compete with dudes that are 28-33.
27-31 - some of these chicks been ran through, been divorced, might have YOUNG children, prolly deep in the career - might be looking for a life raft, but still looking for fun. A lot of the ones without issues have eaten themselves out of the race.
32-35 - smart ones - PANIC MODE, FIND A HUSBAND and the dumb ones "comfortably" single*
36+ - Lord, Jesus, send me a man. *no longer comfortably single
45+ - She still look good? Kids grown. Married, been there done that. But if she got money, you betta have more money. If she don't have money, you're a life saver. This is not even gold digger mentality, at 45+ you need to have made something of your life. Trucker, Mechanic, Banker, something. You not out here still trying DJ, Produce, be a party promoter, etc. If you clubbing heavy, it's cause you're an owner.
She don't look good? She heavy in the church and non-profit fields, "auntie so and so" that paying out the pocket for other sister/cousin/mama/grandmama mistakes.
On the male side
- 18-32 - ideally bang everything in site; but in for most actuality prolly not. Does not really pick up until 25+. HS and College when you're in your best shape, the females (that you want, you know the ones, not cosplay chicks, the ones that watch Naruto religiously) is hollering at Thugs, Rappers, Drug Dealers, etc.
- 33-35 - I been there done, that, got my money right, finally...lemme get married, get my little league coaching game up.
- 36+ - Never been married and not gonna get married - i.e. player for life. Or Been married, now divorced, I have cordial relationship with ex and kids.
- Gen X (my demographic) - If it happens, it happens. But damn if I'm not set in my ways.
These mutant cyborg bodies you young dudes like, y'all can have Blacc Chyna n'nem (or you dudes and BBWs...).
And it don't help that women in my proper demographic (mid 30's to early 40's) are trying to still be City Girlz.
This is Black Excellence for me and mines
That said, a lot of cats 30+ are starting to look abroad.
It starts out as out right tricking (Patrice O'Neal in Brazil for instance) or low grade tricking (pay for the date, she pay you back in bed) or Arbitrage (They love us in Europe and Japan) - but travel enough and realize that not everything is sweet in America. Goes beyond the women....
Cat piss martini
Veteran
Grown folks aint playing these kiddie games.
Grown folks is fukkin.
You young bucks enjoy these godless
harlots talking about a bag and how
much you down to spend.
Most grown men have at least
a dash of pimp energy and these
young broads smell it on em.
they will fukk an older player
that aint glamour'd by the bullshyt.
her: sup red?
me: aint you tina's neice?
her: you know my aunt?
me: she was the baddest out here.
her: badder than me?
me: now how am i supposed to know you?
her: love my aunt but i'm the baddest bytch.
me: interesting.
her: you spending?
me: yeah time and energy fukkin.
her: give me your number.
Grown folks is fukkin.
You young bucks enjoy these godless
harlots talking about a bag and how
much you down to spend.
Most grown men have at least
a dash of pimp energy and these
young broads smell it on em.
they will fukk an older player
that aint glamour'd by the bullshyt.
her: sup red?
me: aint you tina's neice?
her: you know my aunt?
me: she was the baddest out here.
her: badder than me?
me: now how am i supposed to know you?
her: love my aunt but i'm the baddest bytch.
me: interesting.
her: you spending?
me: yeah time and energy fukkin.
her: give me your number.
Yup.
If you are a breh and aren’t carrying a ton of baggage (kids, baby moms, divorce) and combining that with your own preventable BS (being overall washed + adjacent washed symptoms) then you’re gonna be fine. Helps to not be ugly either LOL
Now some folk my try to clown you for being 30+/40+ and not even at least have kids but it’s usually the same folks who are older with the wrecked misery loves company life that are doing the clowning. A 38 year old bytch with 2 baby fathers can’t exactly tell a breh with autonomy (and little baggage) about life when she has already torpedoed hers. She just wants the world to be as miserable as her. And you’ll find some bitter brehs on that some bullshyt as well.
But — this is a marathon and there’s a TON of quality younger females. Can’t worry about the so called competition. You just gotta “compete” with you and you’ll eat.
I'm 37 turning 38 next month
Past two months I've been out on dates with women as young as 25 and as old as 38
the ball is in your court as a man
lol i feel like you need to share with us stories of your former escapades brehThe TL DR - if you're in shape, teeth look good, no gut, dress well enough, got your paper right, got a spot, got a car, baby mama and kids are well handled - you'll eat.
You can eat off of dating apps, if you're going "age appropriate".
You can grab these young chicks if you go to the right social events.
Generally, my observations.
On the female side, they always bring problems
18-22 - No R. Kelly, but these chicks are exhausting to even be around
23-26 - The idea age for a chick to get married, but you gotta compete with dudes that are 28-33.
27-31 - some of these chicks been ran through, been divorced, might have YOUNG children, prolly deep in the career - might be looking for a life raft, but still looking for fun. A lot of the ones without issues have eaten themselves out of the race.
32-35 - smart ones - PANIC MODE, FIND A HUSBAND and the dumb ones "comfortably" single*
36+ - Lord, Jesus, send me a man. *no longer comfortably single
45+ - She still look good? Kids grown. Married, been there done that. But if she got money, you betta have more money. If she don't have money, you're a life saver. This is not even gold digger mentality, at 45+ you need to have made something of your life. Trucker, Mechanic, Banker, something. You not out here still trying DJ, Produce, be a party promoter, etc. If you clubbing heavy, it's cause you're an owner.
She don't look good? She heavy in the church and non-profit fields, "auntie so and so" that paying out the pocket for other sister/cousin/mama/grandmama mistakes.
On the male side
- 18-32 - ideally bang everything in site; but in for most actuality prolly not. Does not really pick up until 25+. HS and College when you're in your best shape, the females (that you want, you know the ones, not cosplay chicks, the ones that watch Naruto religiously) is hollering at Thugs, Rappers, Drug Dealers, etc.
- 33-35 - I been there done, that, got my money right, finally...lemme get married, get my little league coaching game up.
- 36+ - Never been married and not gonna get married - i.e. player for life. Or Been married, now divorced, I have cordial relationship with ex and kids.
- Gen X (my demographic) - If it happens, it happens. But damn if I'm not set in my ways.
These mutant cyborg bodies you young dudes like, y'all can have Blacc Chyna n'nem (or you dudes and BBWs...).
And it don't help that women in my proper demographic (mid 30's to early 40's) are trying to still be City Girlz.
This is Black Excellence for me and mines
That said, a lot of cats 30+ are starting to look abroad.
It starts out as out right tricking (Patrice O'Neal in Brazil for instance) or low grade tricking (pay for the date, she pay you back in bed) or Arbitrage (They love us in Europe and Japan) - but travel enough and realize that not everything is sweet in America. Goes beyond the women....
