The point of you dont want your daughter thinking its ok for a man to put his hands on her is valid. I think most dads agree. But as a parent, you should be thoughtful and careful when it comes to putting hands on your child regardless.
The problem with this discussion is people tend to get too caught up in extremes and we never define what we are talking about or the rationale behind it.
Kids should not be getting Toby beatings. There us no reason for this ever. Thats not correction. Thats you taking your anger out on them. Nothing is learned from that other than how to take and give a beating. On the other side, sometimes all a hard headed ass, immature little person will understand is some pain.
Spankings arent the end all be all and plenty of disrespectful criminals got they ass beat. Never hitting is a fine goal but it may not always be realistic or most effective. Humans are habitual line steppers and only the most thoughtful and mature among us dont require pain or the threat thereof to keep us from going too far.
Honestly, the fear of getting that ass whooped is more powerful and effective than the actual whooping. I got one conscious memory of my pops putting his hands on me. Yet he had me shook and kept me in line. I know plenty of others that got beat all the time (which demonstrates the lack of effectiveness) and were wilin.