Just got divorced after 12 yrs...ama

[Rawtid]

Yep.....when i was dead broke shyt seemed happy....maybe it was a control thing with her i dunno...
But when my paper started lookin good...of course more hours less attention...getting the house n such....it went a lil sour.....like she upset i have more control of our lifestyle......
Now that i think about she use to say certain shyt like it was competition....

Womem....i tell ya

I don't know her, so I can't say she was in competition, but from a nurturing aspect of a relationship, you sort of replaced it with work. It sounds like there was a change in your lifestyle and you two didn't adjust well together. No relationship is sustainable when you work a lot of hours. Hell even your friends quit inviting you out. It's definitely something to balance, but not a reason to check out and cheat.

 

[Apollo Creed]

Yea when she met me i had money...hit a rough patch got back on my feet...thats when i married her.....
I use to tell her all the time...."ill bake the cake...you just add the frosting."
I ask her to pay a bill she'll say...oh you want me to take care of you..smh

, how long did you all live together pre marriage?

 

[Rawtid]

Yea when she met me i had money...hit a rough patch got back on my feet...thats when i married her.....
I use to tell her all the time...."ill bake the cake...you just add the frosting."
I ask her to pay a bill she'll say...oh you want me to take care of you..smh

Oh wow, so she didn't pay any bills? What did she do with her money?

 

[Abstract83]

Yea when she met me i had money...hit a rough patch got back on my feet...thats when i married her.....
I use to tell her all the time...."ill bake the cake...you just add the frosting."
I ask her to pay a bill she'll say...oh you want me to take care of you..smh

I haven't been married but I'm going thru a rough patch right now. Been on and off with my chick for 13yrs. Long story. Can I PM u?

 

[Robo Squirrel]

Yea when she met me i had money...hit a rough patch got back on my feet...thats when i married her.....
I use to tell her all the time...."ill bake the cake...you just add the frosting."
I ask her to pay a bill she'll say...oh you want me to take care of you..smh

 

[NkrumahWasRight Is Wrong]

Every day gmb rears its ugly head

 

[Robo Squirrel]

Dude got off lucky. She could've tied him up in divorce court for years. I've read stories of people paying thousands of dollars in lawyers fees during a divorce.


I had to tell one of my homies to file a quick no fault divorce before his wife changed her mind. This fool talking about reconciling. I'm like she walking away from everything and don't want nothing but her jewelry and clothes?

Sign them papers before she wise up fool! Lucky she was an immigrant that didn't know any better.

 

[phcitywarrior]

Yep.....when i was dead broke shyt seemed happy....maybe it was a control thing with her i dunno...
But when my paper started lookin good...of course more hours less attention...getting the house n such....it went a lil sour.....like she upset i have more control of our lifestyle......
Now that i think about she use to say certain shyt like it was competition....

Womem....i tell ya

Yea OP, after reading through this thread idk man. Seems like she had some red flags from the jump. The control thing is the big thing I'm seeing.

 

[JP_614]

@SlickHomie didnt read through the thread divorced myself my question is did you try marriage counseling? Did you set any exceptions for each other as in do you want her to handle cooking and cleaning and you handle the outdoor stuff those type of expectations?

 

[SlickHomie]

I don't know her, so I can't say she was in competition, but from a nurturing aspect of a relationship, you sort of replaced it with work. It sounds like there was a change in your lifestyle and you two didn't adjust well together. No relationship is sustainable when work a lot of hours. Hell even your friends quit inviting you out. It's definitely something to balance, but not a reason to check out and cheat.

Nail on the head with the friends inviting out.....good observation

 

[SlickHomie]

, how long did you all live together pre marriage?

1 year

 

[SlickHomie]

Oh wow, so she didn't pay any bills? What did she do with her money?

She paid some when she was working
.... but went on sick leave....had the time of her life....didnt look back

 

[SlickHomie]

@SlickHomie didnt read through the thread divorced myself my question is did you try marriage counseling? Did you set any exceptions for each other as in do you want her to handle cooking and cleaning and you handle the outdoor stuff those type of expectations?

She cooked and clean...but hell she has no kids...fukk that...she had the world at her feet charismatic knew a lot of people
Networked good....whatever she should of been a millionaire if she applied herself
I use to try to motivate her go to school...real estate ...stocks.....and i was willing to help all the way to the top

 

[SlickHomie]

I haven't been married but I'm going thru a rough patch right now. Been on and off with my chick for 13yrs. Long story. Can I PM u?

No prob

 

[Bushmaster69]

Yeah I used to think I wanted a wife that was stay at home so she can home school kids 100% and stuff like that but 99.9% of Women today aint capable of doing that, and as mention idle time brings in demonic thoughts, and opens the door for some breh who aint productive and has time to be doing nothing in the middle of the day to be running through ya wife and give her the attention you cant (because you are working). lol

Looks like the Muslims are the only ones winning in this respect.