Prince.Skeletor
Don’t Be Like He-Man
A Brazilian man had to undergo emergency surgery after reportedly shoving a dumbbell up his rear during an ill-advised attempt at self-gratification. A case study detailing the exercise in stupidity was published last week in the “International Journal of Surgery Case Reports.”
After failing to extract the object with forceps, the surgeon was forced to go in manually with their “forearm.”
The unidentified 54-year-old patient had reported to a hospital in the city of Manaus after failing to extract a 4.4-pound metal weight from his rectum for two days after inserting it there, the report said.
He experienced a variety of symptoms following his sex-ercise, including “cramping, abdominal pain, nausea, vomiting in small volume,” and even constipation, per the study.
After an initial anal examination failed to reveal anything, doctors decided to scan the region with an X-ray. They discovered an 8-inch-long dumbbell lodged at the intersection of the colon and the rectum like a cumbersome sex toy.
While the patient was reportedly “uncooperative” during the procedure, doctors said the infiltration was of a “sexual nature.” Either way, they had to act fast to prevent the bum-bell from causing anal “perforation” or another “severe injury.”
They initially attempted to use tweezers to lift the weight out of the pleasure seeker, who was sedated, but couldn’t get a grasp on it.
Left with no other recourse, the team opted for “manual extraction,” which involved the surgeon reaching in with their “forearm” and yanking out the foreign body like a backed-up steer.
Dummy shoves 4-pound dumbbell in anus, needs emergency surgery
Unfortunately, surgeons had a “difficult” time removing the makeshift dildo from his derriere.
