My First Video Game Review!!!! (Horizon Zero Dawn) :banderas:
- Thread starter ORDER_66
- Start date
I'm not even trying to be an a$$hole but you are a horrible writer
ORDER_66
The Fire Rises 2023
is it because it's a ps4 game article??? Or are you just hating.
No it's a shytty, poorly written article. Nothing but long run on sentences. You can use commas instead of putting and 20 times in a sentence. Grammatical errors. I normally wouldn't care but you are suppose to be a published author, which makes it more awful
ORDER_66
The Fire Rises 2023
I didn't have an editor and it's my first article.
You sound like a fukking Grammar Nazi and you are showing your bias instead of taking the article at face value... 
Whatever you don't like it because of errors when you can read it plain as day...
Why don't you do better?
I mean you stan the xbox so anything you say gotta be taken with an ounce of salt. 
Props to helping out @LinusCaldwell with his blog. He seems like a good dude and has been looking for help for a minute.
I agree with @The G.O.D II . The writing is very rough. I don't know if you're looking for a review of your review so I won't blow you up with bullet points detailing what you did wrong unless you ask for it. With respect, I recommend you get someone to proof read your work before publishing it in the future, and look for strong writers who can guide you.
There are a lot of constructive criticisms I could share with you from a technical writing stand point.
As a video game review, I feel like you spent too much time talking about the game's setting instead of focusing on giving the reader an idea of what type of game Horizon is.
I appreciate you sharing though. Too many people shy away from sharing their original content due to the fact that the internet is full of so many wannabe comedians who only care about turning everything into a joke for "likes" and "retweets".
I agree with @The G.O.D II . The writing is very rough. I don't know if you're looking for a review of your review so I won't blow you up with bullet points detailing what you did wrong unless you ask for it. With respect, I recommend you get someone to proof read your work before publishing it in the future, and look for strong writers who can guide you.
There are a lot of constructive criticisms I could share with you from a technical writing stand point.
As a video game review, I feel like you spent too much time talking about the game's setting instead of focusing on giving the reader an idea of what type of game Horizon is.
I appreciate you sharing though. Too many people shy away from sharing their original content due to the fact that the internet is full of so many wannabe comedians who only care about turning everything into a joke for "likes" and "retweets".
ORDER_66
The Fire Rises 2023
Thanks breh... I try to focus my writing on what I experienced when I played the game alot of times I try to fix up anything I have made errors on. all the little details in alot of ways piss me off... I don't have an program like ms word anymore. i'm stuck using google docs it's not as potent as word was where it highlights everything grammatically wrong.
But dudes like god 2 is stupid talking all that shyt but doesnt do anything but criticise, nothing constructive in his post...
You a loser ass bytch
Sike nall pretty cool you should add some pictures between the paragraphs or clips to loosen the long reading. Overall good job
Sike nall pretty cool you should add some pictures between the paragraphs or clips to loosen the long reading. Overall good job
LinusCaldwell
From The Eastside with Love
@The G.O.D II easy constructive criticism is cool. But not straight out attacking. I take full responsiblility for the review. @ORDER_66 helped out and he asked me to read it before posting, as I do for everything posted on the site. I skimmed thru it and yes there are mistakes I overlooked. I do need an editor to help. If anyone would like to help read over articles/pieces before they are posted on my site that would be great. @Kamikaze Revy i try breh.
I didn't have an editor and it's my first article.
Whatever you don't like it because of errors when you can read it plain as day...
Why don't you do better?
Grow up for just one minute this has nothing to do with stanning anything. I'm trying to actually help you out. And it's not a misspelled word here or there. I mean look at that article. It's just poorly written. Random capitalized letters. Periods where there should be commas and vice versa. Some terrible grammar. I mean wtf is this?
Breh this is shyt you learn in 4th grade
ORDER_66
The Fire Rises 2023
ahomeplateslugger
Superstar
i haven't played horizon and gave this a read and felt like i learned a lot about the character's story and the environment but not too much about the game it self (game play, mechanics, weapons, level progression or weapon up-grades, etc.)
i feel like it can be a lot longer if you included that and maybe add pictures since you mention the graphics being beautiful. it was mentioned earlier but there were some grammatical stuff but that'll improve with time.
i feel like it can be a lot longer if you included that and maybe add pictures since you mention the graphics being beautiful. it was mentioned earlier but there were some grammatical stuff but that'll improve with time.
LinusCaldwell
From The Eastside with Love
YOUR
If you guys would like to help write reviews send me a pm. But for real tho let's cool it on the hate. We all are trying here.
Huh I am not hating