The Awkward, Black Boy Nerd and Why He Deserves a Chance

[The Mad Titan]

Yes...very slippery indeed.


Sorry, couldn't resist....lololol....

Your so viscous with it.

That was a hell of a typo.

 

[FSP]

Just coming up and starting a normal everyday conversation. "Hey I like your shirt." And go from there, those are the cold approaches I like and don't sound aggressive or desperate.

Are you still aware of the intent either way? Did you know he was trying to pick you up from the jump?

 

[Neil Tyson]

EXACTLY!!!
Cause if you keep approaching them, they call you desperate or thirsty.
Don't approach them, you're a coward or not man enough.
Such a fukkin double standard...

Only if you're ugly.

This ugly girl gets in my personal space when she's speaking to me. Her breath didn't stink, her hygiene was fine but she was just unappealing to me.

And I thought about it. If she was pretty I wouldn't give a fukk.

 

[Reginald Noble]

 

[Arishok]

Are you still aware of the intent either way? Did you know he was trying to pick you up from the jump?

I just thought he was striking up convo and being nice. The little I learned in that time interested me so when he asked if we could talk more, I said yes.

 

[FSP]

They both take effort. Working up the courage and being able to accept and move on from rejection are definitely key tho.

Even the most successful playas get rejected all the time but they make up for it by being a volume shooter.

I feel what you are saying. You don't think it's possible for someone to get hit with the reject button so much that it just doesn't seem like they are giving effort.

 

[Blackout]

Only if you're ugly.

This ugly girl gets in my personal space when she's speaking to me. Her breath didn't stink, her hygiene was fine but she was just unappealing to me.

And I thought about it. If she was pretty I wouldn't give a fukk.

That actually relates to this.

If a chick doesnt want a nerdy dude then all of a sudden he will magically lack confidence, lack social skills etc.

 

[Reginald Noble]

I feel what you are saying. You don't think it's possible for someone to get hit with the reject button so much that it just doesn't seem like they are giving effort.

They dynamic you are referring to is above most Coli Members comprehension level

 

[Consigliere]

Except this new Gen does talk to females at a very high clip.
Yet things have changed breh.
Everyone is smashing sumfin and the base level of game available.
to the new Gen at such an earlier age of maturity.
Is progressed and a large brewing braintrust.
When judged on how much more they know sexually and socially as people who interact who had sex than the past gems.

I agree that these younger cats have more of everything in their face at an earlier age than we did, which could skew how you view yourself developmentally sex-wise. All my struggles were pre-social media era so take my advice with the same grain of salt as anyone elses.

 

[Queen]

It sucks that so many women especially black women are apathetic and turned off to a sector potential good black men because they aren't bristling with confidence. If a man grows with his woman's support, 9/10 he aint going no where..... alias Its a viscous viscous cycle.

Yep a man getting a lot of confidence (when it comes to approaching women) and being able to approach a lot of women in general isnt something that promotes a man to be responsible, faithful nor financially stable.

Who said anything about bristling with confidence? Who said that confidence = approaching a lot of women? No one is asking for Superman to come bursting through walls. A basic level of confidence is something your parents should have instilled in you. It is not the job of any woman to play mommy and make up for your childhood inadequacies.

If your parents didn't teach you how to look people in the eye, avoid self deprecation, and ask for what you want in life, then blame them. If you find a woman willing to nurse your childhood wounds, then good for you and her. Hopefully you aren't a complete psycho and can be rehabilitated. But your inadequate childhood is not the fault of any black woman in your peer group. Furthermore, black women tend to get criticized for trying to change worthless men so I am not sure you can have it both ways.

Every man will have something he needs encouragement on as your relationship progresses and life throws daggers, but needing encouragement or lacking confidence in one area of life is far different from a person who overall has an unattractive, self deprecating personality. That actually goes for men and women.

 

[bcrusaderw]

So you got a black woman to kinda sort of agree with your theories. Wow! Jesse Lee Peterson and like minded arch black conservatives have a lot of obnoxious theories about black people --- you're like the white guys who constantly point to them in order to validate your terrible views.

What @Barnett114 is saying is that he took inventory of the collective views expressed in this thread. As did I.

Im trying to imagine a hypothetical date with a female equivalent of same cumulative attitudes:

She has nasty views on the intelligence of black males. Considers them dumb, and only interested in bird brains, which "forces" her to date white and asian men (I guess Im the lucky one she's willing to give a chance...heh).

She considers black males washed up by age 30 and undateable. Seems to bitterly relish the idea of scores of black men living alone the rest of their years.

Has an impossibly narcissistic self view of her own intelligence and personality. Thinks its the reason she cant connect with black males because they arent on her level. Considers her hobbies to be unaccessible to the underdeveloped black male mind.

When I ask her what her hobbies are she proudly proclaims they are playing video games, watching anime and star wars, and posting on internet message boards.

When I tell her outside of visiting message boards, I dont consider any of those hobbies to be ideal or interesting, she launches into a huge tirade against me, and ridicules me and black men as being uncultured, and proof of why we are dysfunctional...

In this hypothetical date, Im trying to think how long it would take me to say "check please", and snatch her phone out of her hand to delete my contact, throw my half of the bill at her, and tell her good luck with life 'cause she's gunna need it...

Jesus this was ether.

 

[MajorVitaman]

I mean, do we get mad at dudes for fukking a bunch of Instathots and then settling down with a "wifey" type?

What's the difference?

There absolutely is none. People don't want to seek their own level then they get pissed when the objects of their affection are just as shallow as they are.

why does this always get brought up? Men and Women simply aren't attracted to the same thing. A woman who's been ran through by 50 nikkas carry A LOT more emotional baggage than a dude who can pull 50 instathots.

 

[Neuromancer]

Downward spiral meaning what? A change.
As far as your last part, correct. They shouldn't let other's opinions control them, which they did by going in a downward spiral so what's your point?


Nice art, my problem was more proportion than size, breasts are shaped like teardrops not perfectly circular balloons taped to the chest. There's some great tutorials on deviantart and tumblr.


Thats anecdotal. :chloe: Why are you telling me this?
Either way, that's one chick. Just like you liked someone like her. I like nerds. My point is I was a weird chick that always looked younger than my age and I still dated people (black men).

Every one is weird to someone else. Not everyone is going to like you but most of the time it's not because of interests. It's because of the energy you give off. Some people will resonate and others will be repelled.
Desperation and self-loathing suck.

If someone doesn't want you, it shouldn't change your whole life. It's their loss. Be awesome and people will come. One of my friends is this short Jamaican DJ, he just did a TedxTalk in NY. Black Nerd Rants guy is a YouTube celebrity. When you are confident in what makes you unique, you stand out. People will call you weird but then they end up envying you or trying to mimic you.

Love those who love you, fukk those that don't. Very simple.

I'm sorry I didn't know we were playing logical fallacy games. Since you never asked for any hard facts I offered an anecdote. You switched goal posts there btw.

 

[Lo-Co]

Both articles are full of generalization. The guy is letting high school experiences fukk up his game and the chick is just a dumb bird.

Take it from a former awkward nerd, most black women don't want thugs lol. The finest black woman I pulled was strictly based on not being stereotypical( I am tall with an athletic physique but was extremely shy at the time.the only nerdy thing about me is Academics) and we clicked right away and she even hit me up first. Honestly after I pulled her, I have been able to date quite a few attractive black women ever since then. The finest black woman I am friends(at one point more than just friend, would have dated if we lived in the same city) wants nothing to do with a thug. She is beautiful and 22 years old.

Also a lot of these tupes of guys usually settle for the bottom of the barrell white chick. I am not even comfortable being seen with a white chick in public anymore.

The more assumptions you make about a woman's taste, the more Ls you will take. A month back I had a girl go out of her way to hook up her bad ass counsin with me. Mind you, my ass would have thought she was out of my league.

Let that high school shyt go.

Honestly my high school bullshyt fukked me up. I let myself miss out on 4 years of possibilities because I was hung up on my failures. I don't look at women from an I'm not worthy perspective anymore. Im glad I liberated myself from that mentality.

 

[Reginald Noble]

why does this always get brought up? Men and Women simply aren't attracted to the same thing. A woman who's been ran through by 50 nikkas carry A LOT more emotional baggage than a dude who can pull 50 instathots.

Exactly. You can't just flip the switch when it comes to genders. We both have different biochemical make-up and brain wiring. That hypothetical situation is just plain stupid and unrealistic, does not account for gender differences in preference and perception.