The Awkward, Black Boy Nerd and Why He Deserves a Chance

[No_bammer_weed]

Why cant this mythical black male nerd caricature just prefer white women? This black male nerd story template always portrays him as a helpless figure, with a pure heart of gold, just looking for love from anyone willing to give it, regardless of race, and disinterested in preferences of his own.

Black males eat this crap up. As a group we seem to love not taking any responsibility for our actions. Whether we are the author of these narratives, or others are. When discussing outcomes involving black men like dating habits, out-of-wedlock birth rates, crime rates, prison rates, employment rates, etc, other groups besides black males are always the predatory ones and directing the show. Black males are just along for the ride, and never take any ownership of the activity. Forever docile and unable...

At any rate, it would seem that articles presenting black males as naturally inclined to thug behavior and unintelligence would be shouted down as racist, but constantly portraying the black woman as naturally inclined to loving "thugs" (outside of being attracted to any socially acceptable qualities) is always on the table. Why?

This black male nerd narrative keeps surviving, while black women are greatly outpacing black males in higher education and employment. This is hilarious to me.

 

[VFib]

Untrue. My buddy who I mentioned before just wanted a black girl who didn't think he was a lame, cause he played guitar in a rock band and liked fantasy novels.

Does he approach women? What do they look like physically? where does he go to meet women he is interested in? Does he ask them out? Does he makes his intentions clear? There are NY Meetups he can join and find exactly who he is looking for.

Every single guy that got mad at me for not giving him a chance never made it clear to me that he wanted a chance in the first place.

 

[TEH]

It's best to be a nerd with bad boy qualities, i.e. an Ivy League educated womanizing investment banker. Best of both worlds. Good girls are intrigued by your bad boy characteristics, hope that you will change and quickly become obsessed with you. Use with caution though

Like Morris Chestnut and Michael Ealy in any movie or like Mr Big in Sex in the City ... or so I've heard.

 

[Neuromancer]

Why cant this mythical black male nerd caricature just prefer white women? This black male nerd story template always portrays him as a helpless figure, with a pure heart of gold, just looking for love from anyone willing to give it, regardless of race, and disinterested in preferences of his own.

Black males eat this crap up. As a group we seem to love not taking any responsibility for our actions. Whether we are the author of these narratives, or others are. When discussing outcomes involving black men like dating habits, out-of-wedlock birth rates, crime rates, prison rates, employment rates, etc, other groups besides black males are always the predatory ones and directing the show. Black males are just along for the ride, and never take any ownership of the activity. Forever docile and unable...

At any rate, it would seem that articles presenting black males as naturally inclined to thug behavior and unintelligence would be shouted down as racist, but constantly portraying the black woman as naturally inclined to loving "thugs" (outside of being attracted to any socially acceptable qualities) is always on the table. Why?

This black male nerd narrative keeps surviving, while black women are greatly outpacing black males in higher education and employment. This is hilarious to me.

I actually think they mean geeks *I hate the word* I would assume the attraction to thugs narrative persists because they're the defacto alpha males of our community.

 

[Soon]

Are you speaking from some experience or observation of friends? Real question.

My observations are the same, but I realized I would go in circles if I didn't find out your observations so we can have a common ground.

So, Just going with your observation, they either go with white women who are very welcoming or go with Chinese women who are not as critical. This is why your friend went with a Chinese woman who would not think he was a lame.

I deal with all types of women, but I've been romantic with only Black women, Spanish women, and Indian women.

 

[Neuromancer]

Does he approach women? What do they look like physically? where does he go to meet women he is interested in? Does he ask them out? Does he makes his intentions clear? There are NY Meetups he can join and find exactly who he is looking for.

Every single guy that got mad at me for not giving him a chance never made it clear to me that he wanted a chance in the first place.

I mean he's got a white girl now. But yeah I watched him approach women, as far as making intentions clear I assumed that's what approaching was doing. Mainly around his area back in st. George on SI, bars and places like that.

 

[Neuromancer]

My observations are the same, but I realized I would go in circles if I didn't find out your observations so we can have a common ground.

So, Just going with your observation, they either go with white women who are very welcoming or go with Chinese women who are not as critical. This is why your friend went with a Chinese woman who would not think he was a lame.

My friend is with a white girl. And I agree with you, he went after women accepting of his way of life.

 

[Neuromancer]

My observations are the same, but I realized I would go in circles if I didn't find out your observations so we can have a common ground.

So, Just going with your observation, they either go with white women who are very welcoming or go with Chinese women who are not as critical. This is why your friend went with a Chinese woman who would not think he was a lame.

I deal with all types of women, but I've been romantic with only Black women, Spanish women, and Indian women.

For the record I am just like dude but more pro black so I refused to settle for a white girl. It took me a bit longer (10 years)and I missed out on a lot of fun I could've had but I found me a nerdy black girl.

 

[Prince Mongo]

I basically described myself. Anecdotally, at least in New York, these kind of men seem to do best with women. Less cultured places may want a 100% thug.

Being yourself is bad advice if the person receiving your advice has an unattractive personality.

If that's a description of yourself, I guess you're doing better than me and the average nikka considering I don't know any nikkas who are ivy league educated investment bankers. That's not average where I'm from

And what defines an unattractive personality? If I'm giving someone advice, who am I to tell them that their personality is unattractive? That's very subjective

My point is that there seems to be a running theme on here that to be a black man that's successful with women, you have to fit into some specific stereotype. Which isn't true at all. Like if you're a black man who isn't a "thug" or a "tupac in a business suit" (how it seems your describing yourself), then you'll be eliminated from the dating pool. I guess Cody can be a geeky, square, "beta" type dude and still get hoes but Ladarius has to be superthug to pull anything other than a fat white girl

 

[Soon]

My point is that there seems to be a running theme on here that to be a black man that's successful with women, you have to fit into some specific stereotype. Which isn't true at all. Like if you're a black man who isn't a "thug" or a "tupac in a business suit" (how it seems your describing yourself), then you'll be eliminated from the dating pool. I guess Cody can be a geeky, square, "beta" type dude and still get hoes but Ladarius has to be superthug to pull anything other than a fat white girl

I think a regular black dude or a thug don't have as much dating issues as the black nerd.

I'm not a bad boy a or thug, so if I can't get a women who only responds to bad boys or thugs...oh well.

Women place more value on men with resources. Cody will likely have a leg up on Ladarius in that department so cody will win out, typically. Most of what seems to draw women to black men (I could be wrong ) as a whole is their toughness or alphaness. Biologically speaking. Unless you got resources.

You haven't been around enough black women. Different women respond to different things.

A shallow women would probably respond to toughness or alphaness, like this chick who wrote this article.

 

[Neuromancer]

If that's a description of yourself, I guess you're doing better than me and the average nikka considering I don't know any nikkas who are ivy league educated investment bankers. That's not average where I'm from

And what defines an unattractive personality? If I'm giving someone advice, who am I to tell them that their personality is unattractive? That's very subjective

My point is that there seems to be a running theme on here that to be a black man that's successful with women, you have to fit into some specific stereotype. Which isn't true at all. Like if you're a black man who isn't a "thug" or a "tupac in a business suit" (how it seems your describing yourself), then you'll be eliminated from the dating pool. I guess Cody can be a geeky, square, "beta" type dude and still get hoes but Ladarius has to be superthug to pull anything other than a fat white girl

Women place more value on men with resources. Cody will likely have a leg up on Ladarius in that department so cody will win out, typically. Most of what seems to draw women to black men (I could be wrong ) as a whole is their toughness or alphaness. Biologically speaking. Unless you got resources.

 

[hatechall]

Why cant this mythical black male nerd caricature just prefer white women? This black male nerd story template always portrays him as a helpless figure, with a pure heart of gold, just looking for love from anyone willing to give it, regardless of race, and disinterested in preferences of his own.

Black males eat this crap up. As a group we seem to love not taking any responsibility for our actions. Whether we are the author of these narratives, or others are. When discussing outcomes involving black men like dating habits, out-of-wedlock birth rates, crime rates, prison rates, employment rates, etc, other groups besides black males are always the predatory ones and directing the show. Black males are just along for the ride, and never take any ownership of the activity. Forever docile and unable...

At any rate, it would seem that articles presenting black males as naturally inclined to thug behavior and unintelligence would be shouted down as racist, but constantly portraying the black woman as naturally inclined to loving "thugs" (outside of being attracted to any socially acceptable qualities) is always on the table. Why?

This black male nerd narrative keeps surviving, while black women are greatly outpacing black males in higher education and employment. This is hilarious to me.

While it's true that black women outpace black males in higher education, they still lag behind black men in certain fields. Black engineers and scientists, for example, are overwhelmingly male. Though rare, by no means are they mythical.

Statistically, a black engineer is more likely to find a white woman who shares his interests than a black woman. However, if he prefers white women, people will assume it's because he's a c00n.

 

[WaveCapsByOscorp™]

tl;dr

 

[FLYINHAWAIIAN]

I think some women (won't say all) have been under the believe that they have the magic crotch. That once the thug gets a taste, he'll be helping old ladies across the street, feeding puppy dogs, planting flowers and giving toys to orphans. Some people are actually that silly. Of course, it's not all women. Many of them know to avoid these dudes.

Some of them think it's cool to be with these guys and that someone's going to be there to pick up the pieces because they hear folks like Deb Cooper and they think that they can do that. Truth be told, the older generation should be there to warn folks (men and women) about f'n up their future.

But if the goal is to change a thug into all that, why not just get with the guy from the jump who already does that, i.e. the nerd?

 

[Neuromancer]

While it's true that black women outpace black males in higher education, they still lag behind black men in certain fields. Black engineers and scientists, for example, are overwhelmingly male. Though rare, by no means are they mythical.

Statistically, a black engineer is more likely to find a white woman who shares his interests than a black woman. However, if he prefers white women, people will assume it's because he's a c00n.

This stigma here is why people don't just say. I like this white girl. Because everyone has a damn opinion. Your family, friends and opposite gender. This goes for males and females.