The Family (The Coli movie club) - also some rules

nasty

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pretty much this movie is trash. bad movie to start off the movie club with, fascinating how they had a movie club in the movie which is odd. this movie never knew what type of movie it wanted to be. it was good to see de niro in a gangster role again but damn the writing was terrible for this. this movie had so much potential but it was disappointing. the best part of the movie was the opening lines of goodfellas when they were watching it at the screening. something about the daughter made me want to stick my dikk in her mouth but michelle pfeiffer was ghastly looking. all that botox or whatever the fukk she got makes her look like an alien. can't believe this is the same bytch that was cat woman, used to bust mad nuts to her in that movie. this movie almost made it seem like it was a satire of shytty films because it was so bad. that teenage romance plot was unnecessary and then the c*nt wants to commit suicide after she came onto him, dude was definitely a fukkin fakkit for not wanting a taste of that peach and then avoiding her after. this movie felt like a chore to watch, can't believe it was 2 hours cuz it felt like 3. AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON HOW THEY FIND OUT THEY LIVE IN NORMANDY!. seriously...this movie licks balls and I'm not that negative when it comes to reviewing films. this movie was just that bad. main thing is this movie was just not funny.

i give this movie a 2/10
 
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Bruce Wayne

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It was an Ok Flick but not for Luc Besson, I may just expect more from him as a Director I guess. I remember when I 1st saw the Trailer dor this and it had me thinking that it was a Comedy, it turned out to be much better than Colombiana which had Besson's Name on it as a Producer but he Co-Signed that Garbage regardless. I give The Family a 3 out of 5 Stars.:obama:
 

mannyrs13

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2.8 out of 5. Was tolerable to some extent but it's like the movie couldn't find its identity. Glad they focused on the kids and wife also and not just de niro the whole film. Wasn't too many comedic moments and only a little bit of action. De niro does the mafia role well but having done comedies for a while now has kind of made him rusty in my opinion. Not a movie that has replay value and lackluster considering its a Scorsese. Good time filler tho and if you need a movie to kill time, check it out. But it's nothing memorable.
 

HHR

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What a pile of shyt. 4/10

OK, I came into this film with pretty meager expectations. Something mildly entertaining with some decent bits scattered among harmless misfires.

The Family failed to live up to even that.

So the movie essentially opens with the family, in witness protection, moving to a new village and being subjected to prejudice based on them being American. They combat this by acting far more vulgar and violent and offensive than they'd been stereotyped as :dead:

Then, because it's not enough to use DeNiro as a "retired" or "snitch" mobster, we need to dwell even more on his career by inserting a truly awful scene where he reviews 'Goodfellas' at some sort of public movie debate....or something.

And I probably missed the explanation to this, but why does no one in this village find it weird that there are suddenly a handful of other Americans living in the homes around "The Family"? Why does no one care that DeNiro's character is seen often with his FBI security and their boss?

Whatever....one of the parts of the film I expected to be entertaining was the kids and their adapting to a new high school. Yeah....this was the second worst part of the film.

The daughter apparently falls in love with some TA, although it feels for the majority of the film like she's faking/playing him. After she convinces this dude to become a pedophile....and he subsequently rejects her...she is prepared to kill herself. Literally none of this storyline felt real. I wish she had killed herself. That would have been interesting.

fukk....I don't even want to talk anymore on this drivel. Only to say that the way DeNiro's old gang finds out about his whereabouts almost made me turn the movie off and cancel my Netflix account.

Garbage.
 
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ltheghost

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Jesus.....that movie was horrible. Even though they tired to make an homage to all the sterotypical mafia movies, it was just bad all the way around. To Michelle Pfiffer's horrible New Jersey accent, the pointless daughter storyline, and boring son storyline, and the stupid ass novel the gangster was writing. It had funny critiques of French (Rude) and American (Every solution ends in violence) people but damn Mafia guys are damn near invincible. Perfect killers and whatnot. It was a ham of a movie and probably would have been hilarious if I was drunk or high when I watched it. This movie reminds me of those old Rocky movies where Italians are basically invincible...lol. So, they can kick everyone's ass and outsmart everyone. I give this shyt.....2 out of 10. Next movie.
 

Thatrogueassdiaz

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I thought it was a pretty good movie :yeshrug: I thought the boy stole the show, to be honest. Michelle did a good job, too. A lot of the violence in this movie was pretty graphic, which surprised me. I'm not a big fan of that, but I see what the director was trying to do. The daughter was smoking hot in the movie, by the way. When she gave her panties to that geeky math teacher :banderas:

The only thing cheesy about this movie was how the boss finds the family. I didn't dig on how we're supposed to root for a rat, but I weas sympathetic to the character, who obviously wanted to relive his glory days and re-earn the respect he lost when he flipped. What was up with Tom (can't think of his name) Jones (?) character? He only had a few scenes. And how does someone like that not be able to keep DeNiro in check. They said that they had to move the family around a bunch of times because of the family's inability to remain ambiguous (mostly because of it's problem with violence and anger). I thought the movie was lowkey showing the viewer just how rooted in violence American society/culture is.
 
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