Essential The Official Football (Soccer) Thread - The Slotification of Liverpool is nearly complete

Max B

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Spanish press saying Mourinho wants Kroos:stopitslime:

Daily mirror says Evra to Juve and Janmaat to United:ohhh:

Daily Mirror says Man City Barkley and willing to offer €32million plus Rodwell:patrice:



Roma in for Cole
 

Gilver

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Are people really going to say, with a straight face that United aren't favourites for the title with van Gaal in charge?:banderas:
 

Gilver

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Didn't fukk that girl last night, so proud of myself.:smugdraper:

Soon as i met her i was on some "you're gonna wing(wo)man me tonight:ufdup:"

She was visibly perturbed but agreed(she didn't end up doing because girls are shyt wing people).

I dunno though, didn't have my usual predatory instincts last night...was out with a group of girls for the first time ever...felt like a gay best friend most of the night

Standing in a cocktail bar with girls while watching Holland v Costa Rica pens on my phone isn't my idea of ideal fun. Was outside as the last pen was saved and said to the bouncer "costa rica just missed! Holland are through!"

He looked at me like:ld:

The hate i felt for that human being right then, i was absolutely appalled that he was allowed to exist, so i :childplease: him and shook my head. The way he looked back at me betrayed his feelings, he knew deep down he had failed as a man, his muscles and beard couldn't paper over those cracks, no sir.


Anyway, without the lads i wasn't feeling the pulling craic so i headed home(didn't help that the only hot one of the group fell over drunk and smashed her face and ended up in hospital, mind). Where i proceeded to text that girl i did well not to fukk saying how i wish i'd kissed her(i didn't) and how i like her(i don't) because she has the aura of an actual woman and not a girl(guess she does but i'll take girls for a couple years yet mates).

Why do i play with people in such a way?

Now she is absolutely pesting my life texting/phoning me...wtf?!

Asking me to go get food etc, 'kin hell, cba with this. She was basically crying to me last night how i only wanna be friends if i've got no one else(true). I was like "naaaaaah" and she said "so if for example your scouse mate was in preston you'd have got in touch with me?"

I offered no words, just a literal:mjpls: face.


Hey here's me rambling on...but it's my thread so fck ya'll.

Happy Sunday guys, we should all get together some time, do lunch. No i really mean it, add me on facebook.
 
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Gilver

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HCIcsME.jpg

I'm so #DrunkSmooth.

Why do i do it ffs:bryan:

Swear this girl is gonna pest me to suicide by the end of the day.
 

Gilver

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Had my ex as 'SLAG!!! REMEMBER!!!' for when she phoned me when she knew i was out drinking, for quite some time.

Often rename high risk ppl before a night out, i.e. 'DO NOT TEXT'

'DON'T BE A c*nt TO HER'

Once had 'PLAY IT COOL YOU CLOWN'

These reminders help when drunk tbf:mjlol:
 

Gilver

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It's often hard to find the right words when speaking to a woman, but i feel this sort of thing usually works well

xl3AcMr.jpg


I bring it on myself...


But i figure she's gonna pest me sex or no sex so i may as well get something.
 

yoyoyo1

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