So, I've alternated from being drunk to being sober. I'm a much better person drunk. I talk to girls. I have hours long conversations. When I'm sober, I listen to sad, depressing music. I hate life. But, when I'm drunk I'm a social person. What do I do? It's either kill myself being sober or live an unhealthy life being social with people. I don't know what to do. Drinking makes me a better person. I know, I know, that's the addict in me talking, but it's true.
Most people (like 95%) aren’t even good at one thing.
At least you know what it is you want to do even if it comes with inherent risks.
You only die once.