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Is anyone interested in a guide to beat Depression/Anxiety?
- Thread starter Music Fiend
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Music Fiend
Superstar
Part 1: The Mental Understandings
The first step is understanding, I mean really understanding. You have to get these things in your head from intellectual words to feeling it emotionally to apply these to your life. These are the only things that kept me going when I felt things weren't working.
1) Live like you someone is watching you. It's funny how most of us live in the public eye for work, jobs, in front of friends one way and then when we are alone we allow laziness and comfort to take over so we can live in the shadows. If you are doing anything that you cannot do in public out of fear of being seen, stop it immediately. Examples of a few things for me: Pornography (delete it from your computer, block the sites, etc.), Unhealthy eating habits (I actually felt ashamed that I would go home and eat for comfort. I'm not fat and wasn't fat, but food became a way to cope. Drinking/Smoking alone (I had to toss these out the window because I felt the most alone when I was high or drunk and by myself.)
2) You MUST EXECUTE. This means unshakeable commitment day in and day out. I have found that for our generation, one of the hardest things we face is accessing the part of our mind that unlocks the mental block of being able to fully give ANYTHING 100% effort. In layman terms, you need to go and go until you can't go anymore and then go some more. You MUST reach Physical/Mental exhaustion everyday.
3) No more wasting time. You need to begin planning full days in advance, and execute every item before you do anything else. You will need to fill up free time with activities and pursuits. The way this worked for me, I would pack my food for the day in the AM, I would leave my APT when I woke up and I wouldn't return until late night. Id shower, eat dinner, give myself an hour to wind down.
4) Rest. It will not work without rest. You need to hit 7 to 8 hours a night. This will help yous tay consistent.
5) The way to defeat depression is progression. Many of us have reached a point in our lives were we feel invisible or stagnant, or unsure. One of the most important elements will be making a decision and being decisive. Give yourself an hour at the most to make all decisions no matter how big or small. Once you make a decision, you need to COMMIT to it, give it 100% and execute it immediately.
Read this quote multiple times a day and really digest it
Part 1 to be continued....
The first step is understanding, I mean really understanding. You have to get these things in your head from intellectual words to feeling it emotionally to apply these to your life. These are the only things that kept me going when I felt things weren't working.
1) Live like you someone is watching you. It's funny how most of us live in the public eye for work, jobs, in front of friends one way and then when we are alone we allow laziness and comfort to take over so we can live in the shadows. If you are doing anything that you cannot do in public out of fear of being seen, stop it immediately. Examples of a few things for me: Pornography (delete it from your computer, block the sites, etc.), Unhealthy eating habits (I actually felt ashamed that I would go home and eat for comfort. I'm not fat and wasn't fat, but food became a way to cope. Drinking/Smoking alone (I had to toss these out the window because I felt the most alone when I was high or drunk and by myself.)
2) You MUST EXECUTE. This means unshakeable commitment day in and day out. I have found that for our generation, one of the hardest things we face is accessing the part of our mind that unlocks the mental block of being able to fully give ANYTHING 100% effort. In layman terms, you need to go and go until you can't go anymore and then go some more. You MUST reach Physical/Mental exhaustion everyday.
3) No more wasting time. You need to begin planning full days in advance, and execute every item before you do anything else. You will need to fill up free time with activities and pursuits. The way this worked for me, I would pack my food for the day in the AM, I would leave my APT when I woke up and I wouldn't return until late night. Id shower, eat dinner, give myself an hour to wind down.
4) Rest. It will not work without rest. You need to hit 7 to 8 hours a night. This will help yous tay consistent.
5) The way to defeat depression is progression. Many of us have reached a point in our lives were we feel invisible or stagnant, or unsure. One of the most important elements will be making a decision and being decisive. Give yourself an hour at the most to make all decisions no matter how big or small. Once you make a decision, you need to COMMIT to it, give it 100% and execute it immediately.
Read this quote multiple times a day and really digest it
Part 1 to be continued....
The guide is God 
, people become depressed because they create high expectations in this life, some can't deal with the disappointments and frustrations that the world imposes.
Talk about your problem openly with your family and friends, appreciate them more. Try to do the right things even in hard times, get out more, do physical exercises and try to understand what your role here on earth.
Also, avoid taking drugs as much as possible, once you become dependent your body asks for more and more to the point that there is no alternative but to off yourself
, people become depressed because they create high expectations in this life, some can't deal with the disappointments and frustrations that the world imposes.Talk about your problem openly with your family and friends, appreciate them more. Try to do the right things even in hard times, get out more, do physical exercises and try to understand what your role here on earth.
Also, avoid taking drugs as much as possible, once you become dependent your body asks for more and more to the point that there is no alternative but to off yourself
Music Fiend
Superstar
Part 1 Continued:
6) Be honest. Stop lying to everyone. Stop lying to yourself. IMO the only way to keep this commitment is to UNPLUG. Now I'm not saying delete your social media, throw your TV away, drop any friends you have.... etc. I'm saying that lying is a form of removing accountability. Most of us trick ourselves into thinking we are how we feel. it can be easy to slip away in escapism. You really need to unplug all things that make you feel and start seeing them as tools rather than coping mechanisms. How much you need to unplug will depend on you being honest with how critical your situation is. Example: If you don't have friends who are physically present in your life, stop getting on the internet. Stop using social media to get your fake attention. Stop viewing what everyone else is doing when those ppl aren;t giving 2 fukks about how your doing. Reality is, viewing those stories might make you feel worse, but the real threat is forging emotions from someone else's life. Get off the coli and stop using it as entertainment. FOr me, I really limited internet useage. Once I limited all the fake emotions I was feeling, and ideas I was thinking about that had NOTHING to do with my life. I hit a place a honesty. I realized, the reality was that I didn't want to move on, I wanted to move on but lacked any proof of my efforts. I had been lying to myself for so long about the things I wanted to do and change and be that I truly believed them. When you are honest your efforts match your desires.
At the time I was rapping. Doing shows across the state. Had went from shows with no one in the crowd to 10 people, to 20 people to 50 people to 100 people to 1000 people when opening up for famous acts. I was lying to myself. I didn't love being a rapper. I loved making music and being around the homies and creating. So I left it and went back to college.
End of Part I
Part 2: The Actual changes (Next post)
6) Be honest. Stop lying to everyone. Stop lying to yourself. IMO the only way to keep this commitment is to UNPLUG. Now I'm not saying delete your social media, throw your TV away, drop any friends you have.... etc. I'm saying that lying is a form of removing accountability. Most of us trick ourselves into thinking we are how we feel. it can be easy to slip away in escapism. You really need to unplug all things that make you feel and start seeing them as tools rather than coping mechanisms. How much you need to unplug will depend on you being honest with how critical your situation is. Example: If you don't have friends who are physically present in your life, stop getting on the internet. Stop using social media to get your fake attention. Stop viewing what everyone else is doing when those ppl aren;t giving 2 fukks about how your doing. Reality is, viewing those stories might make you feel worse, but the real threat is forging emotions from someone else's life. Get off the coli and stop using it as entertainment. FOr me, I really limited internet useage. Once I limited all the fake emotions I was feeling, and ideas I was thinking about that had NOTHING to do with my life. I hit a place a honesty. I realized, the reality was that I didn't want to move on, I wanted to move on but lacked any proof of my efforts. I had been lying to myself for so long about the things I wanted to do and change and be that I truly believed them. When you are honest your efforts match your desires.
At the time I was rapping. Doing shows across the state. Had went from shows with no one in the crowd to 10 people, to 20 people to 50 people to 100 people to 1000 people when opening up for famous acts. I was lying to myself. I didn't love being a rapper. I loved making music and being around the homies and creating. So I left it and went back to college.
End of Part I
Part 2: The Actual changes (Next post)
Music Fiend
Superstar
If you stop being a smart ass you will find out. Pyschiatrists are cool, I went there for a bit but it wasn't changing my life. Therapy is excellent and the best option, but most cannot afford the treatment necessary to make real change. You have to find the right therapist for you which cna cost a ton. Then you have to really open up. The therapist 9 times out of 10 is really going to challenge your thoughts, but therapy STILL WILL NOT WORK unless you do most of these steps. Therapy is only part of a coin, the rest is up to your to actually put in the work to change. Therapy also can take years to make progress.
NotAnFBIagent
[redacted]
So far, live healthy and try harder is your advice
Music Fiend
Superstar
I haven't said either of those.So far, live healthy and try harder is your advice
I gave concrete info. If you can't understand that, you deserve your depressed life. I already said the first part is understanding. If you are't going to apply it, and all you got out of it was that then good luck to you captain.
Vandelay
Life is absurd. Lean into it.
Black people and Mental health.
Post it here please TLR is not conducive for this kind of discussion.
Post it here please TLR is not conducive for this kind of discussion.
NotAnFBIagent
[redacted]
Live healthier and push yourself harder is what your advice boils down to so far
Your advice could be useful for a subset of people but sounds more like u were unhappy than depressed
Trust there's a difference
But for those with a chemical imbalance in their brain, or depresed cause of traumatic life events this is largely gonna be useless
Also this is coming from someone who inherited depressive bipolar and is highly frustrated with it, which is why im being so critical right now
Music Fiend
Superstar
Bruh you don't know me, stop derailing the thread.
I had serious depression. Suicidal. Didn't leave my room. Dropped from a 3.8 GPA to a 1.1 GPA. 4 years breh. I had a chemical imbalance, I took meds and they made me feel like a zombie. Threw them away.
Like I said, this works. It's worked for me and at least 10 others. I can't give you exact help because I dont' know you. You are going to have to give something some effort in life breh. Get off your ass, read to digest it and see the things you need to change and apply it.
I have been diagnosed with the same exact thing so keep it moving man. Also inherited.
Music Fiend
Superstar
Part 2: So what Do I need to do?
1) Exercise: You need to join a gym, workout with weights for an hour at least 3 to 6 times a week. Why?
- Progress: Self-eplanatory
- Consistency: This will rebuild your discipline. Get you back to doing at least one thing a day for you. You won't notice it, but as you make progress you are actually breaking the mental block down. You start to see you can move on, you can physically do something that can make change to yourself.
2) Cardio: VERY IMPORTANT. You need to be doing at least 20 minutes of cardio 3 times a week. Why?
- Another mental block to be broken: Cardio is hard and difficult.
- Most people will run until they feel tired,out of breath, then slow down/walk/or stop until the catch they're breath.
- The goal for this cardio is giving something 100% effort. Go out and start a good pace, and run and run and run and run, when you are tired, keep pushing and run and run. You should be exhuasted. I did 20 minutes 3-4 times a week. The goal was to leave nothing in my tank and go hard, beat my distance for the time every time. I went from 1.75 miles in 20 minutes, to 3 miles in 2 months. Change my whole life
3) Never be inside. Assuming you work/go to school, here are places to be on a daily basis outside the two. Gym, Library, Coffee shop, grocery store, park, friends place, volunteer, dive into your hobby or business, join organizations, dance classes. Bottom line is you need to be creative and take action.THe purpose is to restore life to your life. Organically, when you are out you will meet new people. Easiest way for me to leave in the morning and come back late at night was to bring gym clothes, showering items, with me everywhere I went. My day usually went like this
Wake up at 7, Cardio from 730 to 750. Breakfast 750 to 815, Shower, Head out for class/work... Chores (Groccery store, Fix Car, Cleaning, Change oil, cut lawn, do homework, dive into my hobby), gym, shower, organizations I joined, then i'd head to the library (eventually would invite others I met and it became a place for us to hang everyday and socialize), I'd head home around 9. Eat from 9 to 930, relax til 1030 then go to bed.
4) You should be uncomfortable all the time. Your routine might be different than mine. But make sure you are uncomfortable. Whatever your issues are you need to attack all areas in life and get to a new perspective from progress that way you can look at your issues from a better view. A big part of being uncomfortable is trying new things. I said YES to every invite, no matter how stupid. My goal was to not be inside and thus comfortable. I looked on groupon and found classes in my interest that were damn near free, I joined intramural sports at my college to a random team, joined a random basketball league at my gym to a random team, I went to a lot of free events and mixers on eventbrite (some alone and some with new ppl I had met)... Which leads to the next.
5) In every new situation you must connect with 3 people at least. I realized part of depression was a lack of reference to reality. I was so caught up in my own thoughts. In all these new things I was trying in the midst of getting out the house, I would utilize the first hour there to introduce myself to 3 ppl. Turns out most ppl are afraid of making the first move, so go and talk to them. A large part of getting over my depression, was making new friends. I'd talk to em at the gym, in the classes, in organizations, etc on my first day there and invite them to do things.
"If you can't be the best, be the most helpful". I started helping others out find what they need or join them in things that made them happy. I started linking all these new ppl together. I supported them. I remember taking a free class on eventbrite for producing music, I went and met a few new ppl, I'd link em with artists I knew, show them things I knew, go to their shows, help em. Everyone wants to meet more ppl. I started seeing that being the first to reach out and help others out led me out of my depression. They all returned the favor. Within like 6 months I had a whole new circle of friends, went to all new places, had plans, got introduced to my now gf, and was having more genuine funt han I'd ever had. All the while exploiring new things.
PART 3 Tomorrow.
1) Exercise: You need to join a gym, workout with weights for an hour at least 3 to 6 times a week. Why?
- Progress: Self-eplanatory
- Consistency: This will rebuild your discipline. Get you back to doing at least one thing a day for you. You won't notice it, but as you make progress you are actually breaking the mental block down. You start to see you can move on, you can physically do something that can make change to yourself.
2) Cardio: VERY IMPORTANT. You need to be doing at least 20 minutes of cardio 3 times a week. Why?
- Another mental block to be broken: Cardio is hard and difficult.
- Most people will run until they feel tired,out of breath, then slow down/walk/or stop until the catch they're breath.
- The goal for this cardio is giving something 100% effort. Go out and start a good pace, and run and run and run and run, when you are tired, keep pushing and run and run. You should be exhuasted. I did 20 minutes 3-4 times a week. The goal was to leave nothing in my tank and go hard, beat my distance for the time every time. I went from 1.75 miles in 20 minutes, to 3 miles in 2 months. Change my whole life
3) Never be inside. Assuming you work/go to school, here are places to be on a daily basis outside the two. Gym, Library, Coffee shop, grocery store, park, friends place, volunteer, dive into your hobby or business, join organizations, dance classes. Bottom line is you need to be creative and take action.THe purpose is to restore life to your life. Organically, when you are out you will meet new people. Easiest way for me to leave in the morning and come back late at night was to bring gym clothes, showering items, with me everywhere I went. My day usually went like this
Wake up at 7, Cardio from 730 to 750. Breakfast 750 to 815, Shower, Head out for class/work... Chores (Groccery store, Fix Car, Cleaning, Change oil, cut lawn, do homework, dive into my hobby), gym, shower, organizations I joined, then i'd head to the library (eventually would invite others I met and it became a place for us to hang everyday and socialize), I'd head home around 9. Eat from 9 to 930, relax til 1030 then go to bed.
4) You should be uncomfortable all the time. Your routine might be different than mine. But make sure you are uncomfortable. Whatever your issues are you need to attack all areas in life and get to a new perspective from progress that way you can look at your issues from a better view. A big part of being uncomfortable is trying new things. I said YES to every invite, no matter how stupid. My goal was to not be inside and thus comfortable. I looked on groupon and found classes in my interest that were damn near free, I joined intramural sports at my college to a random team, joined a random basketball league at my gym to a random team, I went to a lot of free events and mixers on eventbrite (some alone and some with new ppl I had met)... Which leads to the next.
5) In every new situation you must connect with 3 people at least. I realized part of depression was a lack of reference to reality. I was so caught up in my own thoughts. In all these new things I was trying in the midst of getting out the house, I would utilize the first hour there to introduce myself to 3 ppl. Turns out most ppl are afraid of making the first move, so go and talk to them. A large part of getting over my depression, was making new friends. I'd talk to em at the gym, in the classes, in organizations, etc on my first day there and invite them to do things.
"If you can't be the best, be the most helpful". I started helping others out find what they need or join them in things that made them happy. I started linking all these new ppl together. I supported them. I remember taking a free class on eventbrite for producing music, I went and met a few new ppl, I'd link em with artists I knew, show them things I knew, go to their shows, help em. Everyone wants to meet more ppl. I started seeing that being the first to reach out and help others out led me out of my depression. They all returned the favor. Within like 6 months I had a whole new circle of friends, went to all new places, had plans, got introduced to my now gf, and was having more genuine funt han I'd ever had. All the while exploiring new things.
PART 3 Tomorrow.
Thanks