what does that last sentence mean?
Read it in context with the sentence above it and it should be clear.
Coli Breh that have had kid(s) with your girl and maintained the relationship..whats the secret??
- Thread starter johntheblackjew
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Read it in context with the sentence above it and it should be clear.
Verbal Kint
Superstar
Ehhhh. I understand what you're saying on some level. Comma however, it's only been in like the last generation where there's been an expectation that men are supposed to become experts on the female body during and after pregnancy. Truth is that men have their part to play but even men that are well versed on those things run into issues because pregnancy is simply very hard on women physically and emotionally. Its way more important to be attentive and present than to read a bunch of books and start thinking you know what's going on, particularly emotionally and hormonally. And there are plenty of negatives to truly planning pregnancies. I'm an advocate of being married and in a position where you're ok if pregnancy happens without the stress of trying to plan it
How is that wild?
Men don't live in women's bodies.
All of all guys 50+ with kids that I've ever talked to about marriage, whether married or divorced they've all said shyt changed significantly after kids. Can't remember any of them saying it was for the better though...
It's wild that there is such a lack of interest.
Dudes could tell you sports stats from 10+ years ago but when it comes to the process of having a child and how that process will affect the person they are with it's willful ignorance.
Of course she's gonna be a bytch afterwards. First, if you have ever healed from surgery that shyt hurts and you're uncomfortable which makes you irritable. Second, your hormones are all fukked up so you can't control your emotions. Third, you probably feel stressed and overwhelmed and feel like you don't have support (because your partner is willfully ignorant). Fourth, you see that your partner's top priority is how much freaky sex he is gonna get rather than being a dad.
It's amazing how some of ya'll will act oblivious to why a woman would be frustrated.
Honestly Idk why women put themselves through this. If a man isn't trying to marry you his level of understanding and support is going to be significantly lower than that of a husband general speaking.
Elle Seven
Superstar
Perhaps it refers to how a man can see his lady being pregnant with his child but not truly appreciate the impact of the process on her.
I’m not a man so I don’t know what men see beyond an expanding belly and swelling breasts. I do know during pregnancy, a woman’s body has taken a man’s seed and is literally growing it into a new person, one cell, organ, and body system at a time.
Not only is it creating this new life, it is doing this all at the expense of the mother’s health, to a degree. She is still her and now she has to maintain for her and a little person inside that the man can’t see but she can feel.
The hormones, physical stresses and anxieties of being pregnant aren’t something a woman could ever really convey fully to a man and have him understand; he just sees the baby that comes at the end of the 9 taxing months of the pregnancy.
So, though he will never experience pregnancy himself, at least in theory he can try to understand the magnitude of what she is going thru. Next to that - a woman who has given her body over to the biological process of making another life - it could feel like he is truly disconnected from her if he is focusing on the lack of sex or attention he is getting. She is the one who puts her life on the line during this time, not him. Men need only plant the seed, sit back and watch the magic happen, so to speak. It is the lady who is experiencing this “magic” though.
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Ineedmoney504
SOHH ICEY...WE EATIN
All that’s cool. But if you can’t to the point I can’t be with you no more even tho I’m giving a bunch of support that’s on you and it’s your fault
Ineedmoney504
SOHH ICEY...WE EATIN
Ok cool. At what point as a grown up human should you take responsibility and say I need to get over all that shyt. If it’s never then don’t expect people to stick around
Elle Seven
Superstar
100% this
You're comparing different generations and different mind sets. Men of yesteryear didn't need to understand every facet because they understood it's time to grow up and provide and weren't willing to just walk away because everything wasn't perfect like then they were childless
The post wasn't about reading books. It's about understanding what your partner was going through. I think that was pretty obvious though.
Caring more about getting your dikk wet than the wellbeing of your family isn't support. Idk what family is to you but convenient and easy isn't one of them. If you can't put your family before yourself you have no business creating one especially if it's just that easy for you to walk away.
Terrifying thread
Indeed
I will continue to pull out until im married. Thats how it should be
Babies before marriage is too risky of a move
If a man gets sick with a common cold he acts like it's the end of the world. But a woman has a whole child and he doesn't understand why she's not in the mood to be bounced off the ceiling like some shyt he saw on Pornhub.
Women do themselves a great disservice by having children by men who aren't mentally ready to be husbands or fathers.
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Yeah i mean i feel for OP but bringing up freaky sex and shyt is a bad look. That shyt should really not matter right now.
Elle Seven
Superstar
Get over what? Not trying to troll but I’m not clear on what you mean.
Do you mean get over the changes of being pregnant, giving birth and becoming a parent? Because there clearly is no set answer for that.
I’ll tell you this - the baby you see as a result of her pregnancy took 40 weeks to develop. If you are thinking pushing out a baby is the equivalent of taking a shyt - whereby you might experience immediately relief, I think you may be mistaken.
Pregnancy can literal change the brain function of a woman. When she gives birth, if she is lucky, her recovery may be smooth. Other times, not so much. She can have physical issues herself or even have postpartum depression, which, again, obviously isn’t something 1) the average person anticipates and 2) something that can be fixed overnight. I’m not even going to touch on how dikk looks to you immediately after you’ve just pushed a person out of your vagina. To some it looks delicious and may be welcome but that isn’t the case with every woman.
And everything I just described to you is just for the lady...I haven’t even touched on the points of actually taking care of the baby itself.
If she is taking responsibility to put the child first, then I would say she is doing the right thing.
As @BlackPearl The Empress suggested, it is kind of amazing that, even in this day and age with information abound, a man can get a woman pregnant but not care enough to learn about what the pregnancy ultimately means for their child, her as the mother, him as the father or even them as a couple. If he did, I think 9 times out of 10, he would be anticipating his life to change completely as not just a new father but as a partner to a new mother - and not acting like these changes are the shock of his life.
That's my point. The lack of interest in the actual family situation is apparent in his thought process.
I understand that it may be something extra thats bothersome but idk. Shouldnt be an issue in this situation. The baby comes first and you gotta give a lot of leeway to the mother..for a long time.
Im not sure of his thought process totally but if he wasnt sure of marrying her beforehand then he obviously made a mistake having a kid with her.
If i was OP..id damn near give her another full year and see what happens. What i would not do is buy a house or propose to her at this point though.