Coli Breh that have had kid(s) with your girl and maintained the relationship..whats the secret??

[bl2k8]

There is a reason why the newer generation is passing up kids and marriage. I say this as somebody who plans on having both but at the movement I have neither . I hear so many horror stories from people I know it’s ridiculous

 

[LauderdaleBoss]

Kids ain't for everybody, and they damn sure ain't for me. I'm good on all that shyt.
As a man, you pretty much expected to just suffer in silence and put up with anything a woman does just for the sake of being supportive.

They want you to understand weird ass food cravings and hormone filled mood swings, while they don't understand why you need your dikk wet every now and then.

Compromise is the key, but you rarely hear that being spouted.

 

[JOHN.KOOL]

I still kinda blame you OP, there is NO WAY she hid those controlling and nagging elements of her character for over 2 years, there is no way. You were in love with her therefore you missed and ignored warning signs thstd what happened.

Only thing for you to do is tell her straight up, don't try to sugar coat be completely honest and tell her you think she has to fix up

 

[Anerdyblackguy]

So far it’s been 9 months try coming back in three more months and if nothing has changed then you can be in trouble. Maybe she’s overwhelmed, what are your financials like? (No offense). Has she been working? Since she had her own apartment did she have her own career as well? There’s a lot missing here.

 

[MoneyTron]

There is a reason why the newer generation is passing up kids and marriage. I say this as somebody who plans on having both but at the movement I have neither . I hear so many horror stories from people I know it’s ridiculous

Exactly.

I’m good on that. I’ll never forget my dad saying at one point it was like he woke up and my mom was a different person. I love them both but that was some man to man shyt.

shyt is scary out there. All my brehs starting to get married and have kids and I’m like

 

[Ineedmoney504]

Caring more about getting your dikk wet than the wellbeing of your family isn't support. Idk what family is to you but convenient and easy isn't one of them. If you can't put your family before yourself you have no business creating one especially if it's just that easy for you to walk away.

Get over what? Not trying to troll but I’m not clear on what you mean.

Do you mean get over the changes of being pregnant, giving birth and becoming a parent? Because there clearly is no set answer for that.

I’ll tell you this - the baby you see as a result of her pregnancy took 40 weeks to develop. If you are thinking pushing out a baby is the equivalent of taking a shyt - whereby you might experience immediately relief, I think you may be mistaken.

Pregnancy can literal change the brain function of a woman. When she gives birth, if she is lucky, her recovery may be smooth. Other times, not so much. She can have physical issues herself or even have postpartum depression, which, again, obviously isn’t something 1) the average person anticipates and 2) something that can be fixed overnight. I’m not even going to touch on how dikk looks to you immediately after you’ve just pushed a person out of your vagina. To some it looks delicious and may be welcome but that isn’t the case with every woman.

And everything I just described to you is just for the lady...I haven’t even touched on the points of actually taking care of the baby itself.

If she is taking responsibility to put the child first, then I would say she is doing the right thing.

As @BlackPearl The Empress suggested, it is kind of amazing that, even in this day and age with information abound, a man can get a woman pregnant but not care enough to learn about what the pregnancy ultimately means for their child, her as the mother, him as the father or even them as a couple. If he did, I think 9 times out of 10, he would be anticipating his life to change completely as not just a new father but as a partner to a new mother - and not acting like these changes are the shock of his life.

this is not about having sex for me(which we’ve probably about 5-6 times since my guy got here. I ain’t tripping, I’ll get my nut the old fashion way

this is about the moody, meanness, always attitude, nagging shyt. I’m not tripping on the sex right now, I don’t run the streets, I go to work and come home, we do a bunch of family stuff together and every day it’s still ugliness coming from her that I hate. shyt has you walking on egg shells in your own home cause you don’t which person you gonna get

 

[karim]

@ at the female juelzing in this thread

 

[Broad Street Bully]

bruuuuuuuh. is that the end goal

No it’s not. That’s not the end result for every ending relationship with kids. You too could amicably part ways, co parent and make everything y’all do be for the kid, just stay respectful to one another, COMMUNICATE (that’s big and I still have to learn that to an extent.) and just make an effort to NOT be an a$$hole. That’s how mine is going right now and I got two kids, 3 YO and 3 months. We’re co-parenting to the best of our abilities, trying to keep the bickering at a minimum and just do what we have to do for the sake of the kids. Child support ain’t ever creeping up over here as long as I’m doing what the fukk I gotta do.

But breh, that’s just how it is. It’s up to you if you wanna weather that storm and see if changes back to who she once was. Do you wanna salvage that relationship? If so, do that. If you feel as though you can’t fukk with the energy she got going on and it’s best for you to leave and for y’all to co-parent then do that. If you do do that, then set the boundaries right then and there. Best of luck my dog.

 

[LiveFromLondon]

Make sure she has time to go out and do the things she normally did

she gon come home with another nikka nut on her mouth and be kissing him and his seed

relationships are hard. Yall won't want to hear it but that's why it's best to have kids within a marriage

They aint hear you breh, too lost in the liberal progressive sauce

 

[JLova]

This sounds pretty normal. Having a child is a big deal and a woman’s body goes through a lot of changes. Sex is not happening for a while so better just get that out of your mind. Also, a child is so much work at the beginning especially. The mother does a shytload of work and is spending a lot of time nurturing the baby. This shyt is exhausting.

She may feel like you need to commit and out a ring on her finger. Do you do enough to help her with the baby? Does she get any alone time without the baby?

Think men should have more patience here. The relationship will take a back seat for a brief period.

People too willing to eject. The kid didn’t ask for this shyt. Be esponsible parents and put the kid first. You should be able to resolve your issues later if you’re both mature.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

type of jibberish.

This "child always comes first" mentality is how marriages fail. The child benefits the most from parents who put their relationship first and are happy with each other.

yall acting like dude is some sex fiend who been hounding her for pum pum since the day the baby was born. Breh stepped up as a man should and got a bigger place to live for his new family. He been holding shyt down like a real father ever since baby was born. After some considerable time breh simply expressed the desire for some intimacy to keep that bond with his lady and yall actin like he's an irresponsible bum with no job and no interest in taking care of his seed . He didn't even say shyt had to be freaky. He'd settle for some vanilla struggle sex

shyt it really aint the best idea to knock up a chick you don't see yourself marrying tho.


yea I would say a full year is fair. If after a full year you still won't even let breh touch you? You clearly not interested in maintaining the relationship or giving your child the opportunity to grow up in a household of 2 happily loving parents

You and I obviously read 2 separate posts but okay. Lol

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

You literally said men should 'research'. Apparently that doesn't include books now? I'd think the connection was obvious but I guess I'm not on your level of thought lol.

The biggest difference is the men of yesteryear you speak of were much more likely to be married to the woman they impregnated than today. That's a male AND female issue. Folks today split up easier, give up quicker, and are way more positive towards 'co-parenting' than before

Yeah you're right. It's all about books because the internet doesn't exist. Thank you for addressing that and just floating over my point so you can nitpick small things in my post instead of the actual topic. It's very helpful and constructive. Arguing with you about adjacent points is way better than talking about the topic. Oh and thank you for stating the obvious in the second paragraph. Again super super helpful.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

The way i read it was that she joked about freaky sex but is down with regular sex..just not as often as op would like. I dont think thats shes not touching him but i may be wrong

Right. Dudes trying to rewrite the post to have a talking point. Lol

 

[Kamikaze Revy]

Welcome to dad life mf
It’s not about u any more.
Not your freaky fantasies or your freedom or your playstation or the fellas
U can do what a lot of sucka niccas do and easily find 160 reasons to walk away from your new family. And ask advice from “other niccas in the same situation”
And pay that note every single 30 days for YEARS
And let @Another Man teach your son to play ball.

Or u can raise your son and fukk his mom.
Let her be emotionally unstable she just had a baby. Part of being the head of the household is eating these bs.

Thats all I got. I’ve had two sets of kids by two psycho broads that I left bc of this same situation. Trust your boy, it’s cheaper and better to keep her.

Sanity and sound, wholesome advice in the locker room?
I’ll allow it.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

this is not about having sex for me(which we’ve probably about 5-6 times since my guy got here. I ain’t tripping, I’ll get my nut the old fashion way

this is about the moody, meanness, always attitude, nagging shyt. I’m not tripping on the sex right now, I don’t run the streets, I go to work and come home, we do a bunch of family stuff together and every day it’s still ugliness coming from her that I hate. shyt has you walking on egg shells in your own home cause you don’t which person you gonna get

A big chunk of your post is about sex and how freaky the sex needs to be . Sounds like you have underlying issues in your relationship and she is frustrated. Seems like you have some work to do dad.