Ever been caught Jacking off ?

[SmoothOperator88]

My pops told me years later he knew I was staying up beating off to Skinemax when I was like 12.

I've never been caught by my mom. My sister used to stay catching me though

 

[Pink Slime]

for sure, but the story isn't all that interesting

BUT this thread did bring up a memory i repressed of catching my younger sister with the laptop in bed , watching 2 tight young blondes scissoring...

Thank our Heavenly Father she didn't see me and wasn't flickin the bean as far as i could tell, but that shyt had my head spinnin for a couple days cause she's always had boyfriends...!

 

[Illuminatos]

That Goggle Incognito

 

[Methodical]

I caught a homeboy of mine. Not in the act but I was in his room and I was clowning him about a teddy bear on his bed. I picked it up and his facial expression changed to (red flag) so im tossing this bear around and start talking bout bball and all of a sudden I notice a hole in between this bears legs
Me (silence)
Him:
Me: are u fukking this bear??
Him: (silence)
Me:

 

[Illuminatos]

This happened a couple months ago. My cousin was staying over my aunt's house with us. When i beat my meat in the bathroom there's a long ass hallway so I can hear when a nikka start walking to the bathroom. I just hide everything when them footsteps come.

So this nikka comes walking down the hallway and stops right before he gets to the door. I drop everything and start to move my iphone behind the door. So the nikka leaves and goes back to his room.

I'm like and I get back to bussiness.

2 minutes later all of a sudden this nikka starts to double back.

I hear this nikkas footsteps coming down the hallway fast as fukk

I swear yo I couldn't react in time. That door swang open I tried to jump behind the door but I ain't make it

Cousin: Ohh I'm so sorry

Me: Dumb nikka u ain't see the lights on!! You never hear of knocking??

I stood there for a good 3 minutes vaseline all on my dikk drying up just staring at myself in the mirror like I'm a pathetic ass nikka.

I didn't leave my room for the rest of the night.

 

[A.V.]

I stood there for a good 3 minutes vaseline all on my dikk drying up just staring at myself in the mirror like

 

[GetSomeMoney]

This happened a couple months ago. My cousin was staying over my aunt's house with us. When i beat my meat in the bathroom there's a long ass hallway so I can hear when a nikka start walking to the bathroom. I just hide everything when them footsteps come.

So this nikka comes walking down the hallway and stops right before he gets to the door. I drop everything and start to move my iphone behind the door. So the nikka leaves and goes back to his room.

I'm like and I get back to bussiness.

2 minutes later all of a sudden this nikka starts to double back.

I hear this nikkas footsteps coming down the hallway fast as fukk

I swear yo I couldn't react in time. That door swang open I tried to jump behind the door but I ain't make it

Cousin: Ohh I'm so sorry

Me: Dumb nikka u ain't see the lights on!! You never hear of knocking??

I stood there for a good 3 minutes vaseline all on my dikk drying up just staring at myself in the mirror like I'm a pathetic ass nikka.

I didn't leave my room for the rest of the night.

 

[mcellas]

 

[2gunsup]

Never been caught but this reminds me of what I did to my brother one time. Back in the day we had the black cable box with the Spice channel,

Anyway, my parents weren't home and my brother decides to fall asleep in the living room. I turn on the TV and turn it onto the Spice channel and leave the scene. My parents get home and see my brother sleeping on the couch and the porn channel on,

Mom:

Bro:

Pops:

Bro:

Me:

 

[gangreen]

at this thread. some of Yall needed to know how to hit the power off button to avoid getting caught. Fuk Improper Shutdown....... I still have my dignity.





Never Got Caught Jacking It, Red Handed

But I almost got caught due to circumstantial evidence.


By the age of 11, I beat off for the first time . that first nut was like

Ever since then, I jacked it every day due to the opportunity presented. The family desktop was in the living room behind the couch.

The primetime to beat off was at 3:30- 4:30 when I got home and before Mom dukes came home from work.Older Sister was away in college and Pops didn't come home from dental school until 6:30.

For that 1 hour for the next three years, I became a porn aficionado. Specializing in bootytalk 1-45. Lucy Pearl, Charlie Angel, and Obsession were some of my favorites.

Well I digress.

What I used to do was start the jackin at approximately 3:40 and let the fireworks go off at around 4:20 before Moms came home. Didn't use a sock cause I wanted to see how far my stuff would shoot out. It sure did go far after 40 minutes of jacking

What I did after I was done with the deed, was to wipe my hand on this spot on the black carpet underneath the couch. Well I did this on the same spot on the carpet every day except weekends.

My DNA was all over that spot of the carpet, Nuts from the past 650 successful nuts were on that carpet. That spot was all crusty and moldy. Thinking back on it, I was a disgusting mofo

Well on a weekend, my mother asked me and my father to help her rearrange the couches.

Well when we got to the couch which covered evidence of my sinful deeds.

We moved the couch

My mother saw that shyt on the carpet and said what the fukk is that

I said oh, after school one day, I was eating some cream of wheat near the computer and it spilled it.

I thought I cleaned it all.



My pops was looking like

She said well clean that shyt and I did, dodged a bullet, Those nikkas couldn't connect the dots.

From that day on, I used a sock to withhold the contents of my escapades. That was a little too close.

 

[Whatsgood86]

I never had the fam really find shyt until I was 20 so it wasn't that big of a deal but I had to move back in with my parents and ended up leaving some nasty ass porn dvds behind...gaggin, cumswappin, creampies - the whole nine. When I went back a few months later to grab the last of my bags....the dvds were mysteriously the only things missing out of them...hmmmm Its all good though I stole their Max Hardcore jumpoff back when i was like 14/15!!!

 

[T-K-G]

I stood there for a good 3 minutes vaseline all on my dikk drying up just staring at myself in the mirror like I'm a pathetic ass nikka.

 

[Black White Sox Hat]

yeah by my grandma back in the day bytch aint knock,i give no fukks

 

[Billy Preston]

This happened a couple months ago. My cousin was staying over my aunt's house with us. When i beat my meat in the bathroom there's a long ass hallway so I can hear when a nikka start walking to the bathroom. I just hide everything when them footsteps come.

So this nikka comes walking down the hallway and stops right before he gets to the door. I drop everything and start to move my iphone behind the door. So the nikka leaves and goes back to his room.

I'm like and I get back to bussiness.

2 minutes later all of a sudden this nikka starts to double back.

I hear this nikkas footsteps coming down the hallway fast as fukk

I swear yo I couldn't react in time. That door swang open I tried to jump behind the door but I ain't make it

Cousin: Ohh I'm so sorry

Me: Dumb nikka u ain't see the lights on!! You never hear of knocking??

I stood there for a good 3 minutes vaseline all on my dikk drying up just staring at myself in the mirror like I'm a pathetic ass nikka.

I didn't leave my room for the rest of the night.

Breh I'm at work cryin....... Of course the moment I start laughing uncontrollably, an employee comes into the office needing me to set up a new associate.

 

[havoc]

I caught a homeboy of mine. Not in the act but I was in his room and I was clowning him about a teddy bear on his bed. I picked it up and his facial expression changed to (red flag) so im tossing this bear around and start talking bout bball and all of a sudden I notice a hole in between this bears legs
Me (silence)
Him:
Me: are u fukking this bear??
Him: (silence)
Me: