Ever Found A Family Member's Porn Stash?

[↓R↑LYB]

I was talking to my cousin today and for whatever reason I thought about when we found his pop's porn stash. Funny thing is his dad was a super religious dude too. In our church he was EASILY the top deacon and next in line to be the preacher.

One day he sent us out to his work truck to pick up a few tools. The deed shouldn't have taken more than 3 minutes max. His instructions were to look behind the seat, pick up the tools, and bring them back. When we pushed the seat back we found 4 or 5 Juggs (or something like that) magazines. This was back in the mid 90's when porn mags were still viable. Uncle was into some weird ish too b/c these weren't the smooth in-shape PAWGS from like playboy. These were 45-60 year old wrinkly chicks with looooong chewed up titties and such.

I aint gonna lie, I still looked through all the pictures though . 'Twas my first time with full access to porn.

We came back to the house like 10 minutes later and he goes 'what took so long'. Me and my cousin both had that look like . I started laughing and he got that look on his face like I gotta keep these lil nigglets quiet.

He immediately goes into negotiation mode and starts trying to offer us food and other little stuff. Then I remembered that he had been stonewalling us on Wrestlemania 12. To us that ish was like the Super Bowl. Me and cuz had already talked about basically blackmailing him into buying it, but cuz froze up at the moment of truth.

Cuz tried to let him slide easy with some rented games, but I was like nah Unc. What you got on that Wrestlemania???? He paused for a second and then gave in.



That iron man match was piff too.

Let's keep it 100 Breh, that old man molested y'all lil nikkas and paid you off with a PPV package

 

[iamstr8fire]

Let's keep it 100 Breh, that old man molested y'all lil nikkas and paid you off with a PPV package

Good try though.

 

[LezJepzin]

found my pops 2 vhs tapes when i was 8...it was mixed in with the boxing stuff he recorded on vhs...i remember asking my mom what indiana joan was? i thought it was indiana jones but it was written wrong...she snapped at me and told me to put it back...so later on i snuck it out while my mother was sleeping and i put in the vhs in the basement TV...i was like ..didn't know what i watching or what they were doing but it was something special..by the way indiana joan was a horrific racially insensitive porn...white girl explorer getting fukked by african "natives" saying ooga booga and shyt like that

Googles

I remember stumbling across my dad's porn videos when I was 11. Came to find out, he had four other hideouts in the house . 80s porn, of course, but still fap worthy. I used to remember setting the VCR counter of where he left off at the tape so I can set it back there and put it back where I found it so he wouldn't know shyt. But he eventually caught on but didn't trip. I think he was just impressed I did all of that each time

Also, I remember when I was in middle school when me and my friends found one of our boy's dad's Playboy stash. About 20 years worth of mags We would take them to a van by my friend's grandparents house to read them in private. The van wasn't being used at the time but they soon got caught in there.I wasn't there when they got busted though

 

[Jasmine20]

you need to go to a hypnotherapist to have that memory buried

It was only on for two seconds before I turned it off but its a horrifying memory for me. My dad is so dumb. I asked him for my 5th grade prom tape (yes he taped my prom ) so I can use it for a school project. And he said "yes go get it from the bedroom. Its the one with no label on it." So I went in the room to get it but I see two tapes with no label on it. So I'm thinking let me see which one is my tape. So I put one of the tapes in the VCR and when I pressed play I saw them getting it in. He was giving her head . I screamed out ewwww so loud. I hurried up and turned it off. When I went back in the kitchen he asked "Did you find the tape?" I said " yes" with a disgusted look on my face. He asked "what's wrong Jazzy?" I said " nothing." I never said anything to them about it. And this happened in 2003 or 2004.

But its funny when my mom tries to act holier than thou and in my head I'm thinking "bish you have a sextape ."

Nah....son needs to buy a Delorean with a flux capacitor, go back in time 5 minutes before he finds the tape and destroy the evidence....

I'm a she. LOL

I see you have my quote in your sig.

 

[Banned Account12]

How you know that wasn't your dad's vibrator?

yo im dying laughing

 

[Kliq_Souf]

stayed at my aunt and uncles spot dolo when i was about 13. Since i was going to be there for several hours, I immediately went snooping around for the porn, cuz i aint have a pc there, and this was at the peak of my faphood
nikkas know what i mean, like around the first time you discover jerking, its ALL you think about, and you want to do it ALL the time.

I opened a drawer in their bedroom and voila, all the shyt was there... pornos, toys, manuals, all the wild shyt
found some big ass black anal beads, like billards ball size.. goddamn my aunt a freak

 

[Banned Account12]

i found my moms stash of porn when i was like 10 i sat and watched the videos for hours, then in my 20s my mom had some stuff in my storage closet and i was moving so i went thru the stuff it was all types of dildos and vibrators in there , i have never looked at my mom the same again ever

 

[Money Be Green]

One time when I went over my pops house I was in the guest room just snooping around. I look into a box a see a movie case. It said freaks of nature. The picture on the front had a bytch with 6 titties . I look on the back cover and it was more weird shyt . I was disgusted

 

[iamstr8fire]

I see you have my quote in your sig.

I recognize piff when I see it.

 

[AllHolosEve]

let me ask this question, who know bout this......

my house got raided, cop came out the basement where i let some people store some sh!t, dude got sh!t in his pockets smilin, we all cuffed wit guns on us snappin so we dont pay attention, once they leave its a pack of newports & some beers gone, my guy come to get his stuff the next day like "did you borrow my big booty black girls movie"... old white cop got the cigarette, liq & porn stash at once, walked out like we was all like....

 

[The Antagonist]

that's why you buy a desktop AND a laptop. guests can use the desktop, but the laptop is OFF LIMITS TO ANYONE BUT YOU

step ya internet porn game up homie....

How yall jerkin' on a laptop.

Pause

 

[↓R↑LYB]

How yall jerkin' on a laptop.

Pause

rookie

 

[PabloEscobar]

How yall jerkin' on a laptop.

Pause

sit that motherfukker on something and now its a desktop nikka

 

[The Antagonist]

sit that motherfukker on something and now its a desktop nikka

Lol, I didn't think that one through. I never really was a laptop guy though so it didn't occur to me.

 

[RealestSinceKumbaya]

One time when I was like 8 or 9, I was at a cousin's house and he was looking for a movie, think it was My Cousin Vinny or some shyt, and he stumbled across his pop's stash in a lil compartment behind all the other VHS. Mad 80's porn.
That finding gassed me to find my pops stash, and I found it, more 80's/early 90's porn.

A year after that me and all the other kids on my block found a big ass box full of Playboys and Hustlers, at least 100+ issues in the park across the street from us. It was a hot Summer that year.
Later on that same Summer, me and some friends were at another cousin's crib and we found a big ass box of porn VHS my uncle stashed there, we hit the gold mine, brehs.